Rehearsal Dinner Ettiquette

Re: Rehearsal Dinner Ettiquette

• Maggie0829 member

  

  May 2013

  Anyone who has some involvement in the wedding itself should be invited along with any of their SOs.  You can of course include others as well like any OOT guests or other family members if your ILs wish but those are not necessary.
  
  Just make sure that whoever is invited, their SO is invited as well.  To do otherwise is rude.

  
  

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• AddieCake member

  

  May 2013

  Anyone participating in the wedding, as well as their SOs, should be invited. Many people also invite immediate family. 

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• athomfor member

  

  May 2013

  Anyone who needs to attend the actual rehearsing of the ceremony. So wedding party, readers, officiants, grandparents (if you choose). We're inviting our ushers and greeters as well as all of our out of town guests, but that is not manditory.
  
  All SO must be invited.

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• Bubblegum5586 member

  

  May 2013

  Thanks, pretty much what I thought, but wanted to confirm.
  
  One more thing actually. We have alot of OOT guests so we wont be able to invite them all because now thats half the wedding! The officiate is my Uncle, so of course my Aunt is invited as well (they are REALLY OOT - traveling from New Mexico to Massachusetts!) Their kids are in their 20's am I expected to invite them too?

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

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• kmcclelland7 member

  

  May 2013

  If you have a lot of OOT guests, maybe after the rehearsal dinner you could meet at a bar/casual restaurant to greet them.  This of course would not be in place of a RD.  I have a large number of my guests that will be traveling from OOT and there is a restaurant across the parking lot from the hotel so after dinner we will go there to just visit with people that are taking the time to travel long distances to share in our celebration.  That way you don't have to invite a bunch of family (doesn't sound like you are) to the RD, but can still visit a little before the wedding.  

  
  

  As everyone has stated, anyone involved in the rehearsal needs to be invited to the RD along with their SO or parents if you have any children.  As far as your cousins in their 20's, I think it would be a nice gesture since you are inviting their parents and they will be a long way from home, however not entirely necessary since they are adults themselves and not involved in the WP (I'm assuming?).  I could be wrong on that, so other posters can correct if I'm wrong.

  

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• athomfor member

  

  May 2013

  In Response to Re: Rehearsal Dinner Ettiquette:
  [QUOTE]Thanks, pretty much what I thought, but wanted to confirm. One more thing actually. We have alot of OOT guests so we wont be able to invite them all because now thats half the wedding! The officiate is my Uncle, so of course my Aunt is invited as well (they are REALLY OOT - traveling from New Mexico to Massachusetts!) Their kids are in their 20's am I expected to invite them too?
  Posted by bubblegum1309[/QUOTE]
  
  IMO, no. Well probably not. I would say they do not need to be invited if the grown children are making the own travel arrangements, self sufficent, etc. If it's a 21 year old who is flying with mom and dad then maybe.

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• Bubblegum5586 member

  

  May 2013

  Thanks everyone! I have a much better feel on this now, and have a proper number of guests to look into a venue for the rehearsal dinner
  
  Yes my 2 cousins no longer live in NM with their parents and have lived on their own for 5+ years in NY or DC (so not as far to travel for them!)
  
  I agree with the idea of getting toegther after the rehearsal! It will be great to see everyone in a small setting before the wedding. Actually on my mom side of the family since all the cousins and aunts live in several states so we can never attend eachother showers... we do a "linagerie party' the night before the wedding. So after some drinks with everyone at the hotel bar I believe the men are going across the street to a cigar bar to smoke stogies and the women are going to a hotel room for our linagerie party.
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

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• VadersValkyrie member

  

  July 2013

  Sorry to revive an old thread, but I didn't want to start a new one with almost an identical idea:
  
  I started putting together the list for the rehearsal dinner and it's at 42 people...that's half my wedding guest list!  My problem is that, when my brother and his wife got married last year, they invited grandparents, aunts/uncles/etc to their rehearsal dinner.  As we are having a bigger bridal party (5 for each us, as opposed to 3) that gives us a ton of extra guests.  So...is it okay to not invite my cousins/aunts/uncles, unless they're directly involved in the wedding?  (EX: one of my cousins will be playing music during the ceremony, as he did at my brother's wedding).
  
  Thanks ladies!

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• ashleyep member

  

  July 2013

  VadersValkyrie said:

  Sorry to revive an old thread, but I didn't want to start a new one with almost an identical idea:
  
  I started putting together the list for the rehearsal dinner and it's at 42 people...that's half my wedding guest list!  My problem is that, when my brother and his wife got married last year, they invited grandparents, aunts/uncles/etc to their rehearsal dinner.  As we are having a bigger bridal party (5 for each us, as opposed to 3) that gives us a ton of extra guests.  So...is it okay to not invite my cousins/aunts/uncles, unless they're directly involved in the wedding?  (EX: one of my cousins will be playing music during the ceremony, as he did at my brother's wedding).
  
  Thanks ladies!

  Yes, it's okay. I'm not inviting any of my cousins or aunts or uncles.

  

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• loca4pook member

  

  July 2013

  1) Readers, yes

   

  2) all with dates, yet

  3) possibly out of town guests, if possible

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