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wedding party family dillemna!

dananjeremydananjeremy
in Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
My family is a bit dysfunctional. I have three stepbrothers and one step sister. I'm incredibly close to my step sister and ONE of my step brothers. The other two and I get along just fine and I am blessed to have them in my life, but we aren't super close. My fiancé and I would like to ask my step sister and youngest step brother to be members of our wedding party. Is it okay to do this and not ask the other two step brothers? I honestly don't think they'll be offended or care, but it still worries me!
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Re: wedding party family dillemna!

  • s-aries8990s-aries8990 member
    Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Name Dropper
    Your wedding party should be your nearest and dearest, regardless of blood relations. If you don't think they'll get offended, then don't worry about it.

     Did you already chose who you would like to give a reading? That is an alternative.
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  • AddieCakeAddieCake member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    If you're not close to someone, you don't ask him or her to be in your WP.

     /bangs gavel
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    You are not required to ask all siblings, or any siblings, to be in your wedding party.
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  • gottahavashortigottahavashorti member
    2500 Comments Combo Breaker
    If they won't be offended, go ahead.  Technically you can ask whoever you want, but with family it can cause unnecessary drama in some cases when some but not all are included.
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    Planning/Married Biology
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  • allispainallispain member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    I think what you propose to do is just fine. I do like the idea of asking them to do a reading together or be ushers or something that acknowledges them at the ceremony.

    I have a male friend who is getting married this summer who has 5 brothers, and he asked all of them to be in his WP. One of the brothers is also getting married - he picked his "favorite" two brothers and some friends. The other brothers thought this was great - they don't have to get as dressed up or be in all the pictures. Male logic.
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  • kmmssgkmmssg mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    In Response to Re: wedding party family dillemna!:
    [QUOTE]I think what you propose to do is just fine. I do like the idea of asking them to do a reading together or be ushers or something that acknowledges them at the ceremony. I have a male friend who is getting married this summer who has 5 brothers, and he asked all of them to be in his WP. One of the brothers is also getting married - he picked his "favorite" two brothers and some friends. The other brothers thought this was great - they don't have to get as dressed up or be in all the pictures. Male logic.
    Posted by allispain[/QUOTE]

    Your post reminded me of when DH and I got married over 16 years ago.  He has 5 brothers.  We were talking about the wedding party and I asked him if he thought his brothers would want to do it.  He said "I had to put on a monkey suit for every one of them, they can do it for me."  His brothers all said yes, of course, but it was just kind of funny so see it from a guy's perspective.

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  • phira_22857389phira_22857389
    10 Comments
    My sister-in-law was closer to my sister than she was to me. Originally, neither of us was asked to be in the wedding party, but when my brother couldn't reduce his groomsmen any further, and my sister-in-law needed another bridesmaid, she asked my sister and not me.

    I was given a smaller role in the wedding. However, I felt like I wasn't really part of the family, and I'm in almost no pictures. It was incredibly hurtful and I'm still upset about it years later.
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  • [Deleted User][Deleted User] member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    No, I had one sister in my BP and the other wasn't. Also I had a few nieces/nephews (all in their 20's) help with some wedding day things (programs, usher, bubbles) but not all of them for different reasons.

    But it would be nice if you asked the siblings not include to participate in a few family photos so you can have some current family shots. I don't know about your family but with mine someone is usually missing from a family shot because someone has to take the photo.
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