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RSVP Rant

GisellerinaGisellerina member
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in Wedding Woes
Saturday was the RSVP deadline.  Only received 50 out of 250.  I find it hard to believe that 180 people did not know their availability and could not respond.  (The other missing 20 called/emailed to tell me they were maybes and could they respond later - they don't know their work schedules yet - ER doctors and a police officer - totally legitimate to not be able to RSVP yet!!).  Just wanted to whine to others who might share my frustration.  Hopefully, a bunch of people mailed them on Saturday and my mother's mailbox will be overflowing with RSVPs this afternoon!!! 
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Re: RSVP Rant

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    hmonkeyhmonkey member
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    omg i cannot believe that other people have lives and things to do!
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    dmahadaydmahaday
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    No....that's a very low number of responses, out of 250, to still not have received after the deadline.  Have you moved?  Could there be any confusion?  That does seem odd.  I would be frustrated too.
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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @hmonkey I didn't complain that everyone has lives and things to do.  I complained that people who do know whether they are or are not attending have not responded.  It's not that hard to check accept or decline and indicate entree choices.  And then return a pre-stamped addressed card. 

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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @dmahaday.  No, we haven't moved.  And my mom said delivery has been by the regular mailman.  So I don't think there's postal issues.  Our date is really close to the 4th of July, so we are expecting a lot of no's.  We're hoping that maybe people saw June 1st and thought "mail on June 1st"!  My mom is definitely getting stressed though since the florist needs a count by Friday for ordering the flowers and vases for the centerpieces.  I'm glad I'm not the only one who finds the situation frustrating!  Thanks!

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    WzzWzz member
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    how much time do you have until you need to give an actual headcount?

     

    also, how early did you send out your invitations?

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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @Wzz Save The Dates went out in April.  Invitations went out a little over three weeks before the RSVP deadline. 

    We had originally been talking about an October 2014 wedding.  Due to a family member's ill health, we had to move the date up to this summer.  So, we did expect a lot of people to be unable or unwilling to come.  (Arizona desert in the middle of summer isn't a lot of people's idea of a fun time!)

    But, we didn't think it would be so hard to get a "yes" or a "no" from so many people.  Florist and Baker need numbers by the end of this week.  We still have some time for the Caterer, Mixologist, and Venue.

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    hmonkeyhmonkey member
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    @gisellerina if you already know that people know whether or not they are attending ... that presumes you know as well.  what's with the card?

    get on the phone and start making calls.
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    6fsn6fsn member
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    It's been a day.  Give people some time.
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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @hmonkey, I don't know that they know.  I just find it hard to believe that 180 people did not know by the RSVP date and could not return the RSVP card. 

     

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    WzzWzz member
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    edited June 2013

    i don't understand the answers to my questions. what is the date you need to give a headcount to the venue?

     

    what is your actual wedding date?

     

    these are important. most people, if given too much time, willslack off and forget to send back the RSVP, even though you put a stamp conveniently on it. also, some will send them, and they will get  lost. some will send them late. so if you sent it out with time to spare before you need to give a headcount, then no need to worry. give it a week and start making calls.

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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @6fsn - I agree that it's not that far past the deadline.  Which is why we're not going to start calling people until Wednesday after the mail has come.  It wouldn't be so stressful if we didn't have a Friday deadline with some vendors. :(

     

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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @Wzz.  The venue doesn't need a headcount until the week of.  Same with caterer.  Same with mixologist. Florist needs to know the count for table centerpieces and individual place settings this Friday.  Cake baker needs to know headcount this Friday.  So, two vendors need a count this week.  Three vendors don't need a count for two more weeks. 

    I wish we had more time to spare!  Rush wedding planning hasn't given me much wiggle room!!! 

     

     

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    hmonkeyhmonkey member
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    ... mixologist?
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    WzzWzz member
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    that's the new fancy word for bartender,@hmonkey.
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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    edited June 2013

    @hmonkey Yes, mixologist.  He's created several cocktail and mocktail recipes for us.  (Cocktail tasting has been my favorite tasting by far!!)  Because the majority of my family is opposed to alcohol for religious reasons, I wanted to make sure they had signature drinks to enjoy too.  So, we need to estimate our drinkers/non-drinkers for beverages, just like giving entree counts to the caterers.  That one I'm not too worried about, since it's not due until later.  But I am super worried about the florist.  I hate to have to guess how many centerpieces and place settings I need!

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    WzzWzz member
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    @hmonkey, these people are crazy. they have video resumes.

     

    http://mixologicalmagic.blogspot.com/

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    hmonkeyhmonkey member
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    mocktail = juice blend

    i accept paypal, thank you!
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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @hmonkey.  Mocktail = Cocktail with no alcohol.  May be juice based, soda based, lemonade based, etc.  Muddled fruit, no muddled fruit.  Spices.  Herbs.  Garnishes. 

     

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    hmonkeyhmonkey member
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    image
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    dmaloofdmaloof
    First Anniversary First Comment
    With my RSVPs we had the majority of them come in on time. BUT we wee anticipating that people would see the date for the RSVP and think that they can mail it on that date. I would give it at the maximum a week and then start calling. That's what my fiancé and I did. Good luck!
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    GBCKGBCK member
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    So, that's a juice blend.

    Gisellerina said:

    @hmonkey.  Mocktail = Cocktail with no alcohol.  May be juice based, soda based, lemonade based, etc.  Muddled fruit, no muddled fruit.  Spices.  Herbs.  Garnishes. 

     


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    NOLABridesmaidNOLABridesmaid member
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    All I got from this post is that I would love a Mocktail right about now.

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    MissMollyMissMolly member
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    Gisellerina said:

    @hmonkey I didn't complain that everyone has lives and things to do.  I complained that people who do know whether they are or are not attending have not responded.  It's not that hard to check accept or decline and indicate entree choices.  And then return a pre-stamped addressed card. 

    I 100% agree with this. How damn hard is it to check a box and drop it in a mailbox? Add to that, that they don't even have to pay for postage. Hopefully you hear back from gobs of them very soon!
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    VarunaTTVarunaTT member
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    edited June 2013

    To be fair, the reason "mixologist" was born was b/c the recipes they create are as complicated and require knowledge about food and liquor chemistry (why you might want to add an egg white to your cocktail) and pairings that isn't what your average bartender is slinging in the majority of bars.  BFF begrudgingly starting calling himself this, after becoming a professional competitor in creating drinks, being able to make any one of 100+ drinks on demand correctly and know their history and the history of the liquor (regions of scotch, 3 herbals used in gin, tequila specialty knowledge, etc) and creating drinks with specialty (usually made by the actual restaurant) liquors that were paired with food in a high end restaurant.

    This isn't the bartender that overpours your [insert liquor] and coke.

    �
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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @dmaloof - Thanks for sharing - that means there is hope for me that the RSVPs will get here soon.  The florist just called me to "remind" me of the Friday deadline.  Eek!

    @GBCK - Yes, most mocktails (but not all) have a base that is a juice blend. 

    @NOLABridesmaid - Your comment made me giggle (and love it - hmph for anonymous love its).

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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    Thanks @Alesha1978! 

    @VarunaTT - you are completely correct; thank you for being able to better define mixologist and explain what they do. 

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    EPalmer2013EPalmer2013 member
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    Or maybe they thought July 1st!  Be prepared for them to keep coming.  I will never understand the RSVP delay.  You address it, stamp it.  Just check yes or no and throw it in the mail.

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    GisellerinaGisellerina member
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    @EPalmer2013 - the wedding is June 29th!  So, I would hope none of my invitees thought the deadline was July 1st!  Luckily we got some more in last week, and the florist extended my reply deadline to today.  My mom spent all weekend calling and emailing people, so we have a better idea of numbers now, but still a lot of unknowns.  It's super frustrating though.
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    EPalmer2013EPalmer2013 member
    First Comment
    Oh...wow.  You are definitley feeling some stress.  I have my own invite/rsvp issues right now but I'm 2 months out.  Good luck to you!
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