need career advice/to rant...

Re: need career advice/to rant...

• cwaggoner07 member

  

  June 2013

  First I just want to say: Do NOT be discouraged by your career path at your age. My mom graduated college at 32 and became a CPA, all while raising 3 kids. My H and I met working at a tax firm, and then he got accepted to film school in California (we're in TX) at 28 and lived there for 2 years, and now works in the film industry on set. He has never been happier - I can't believe he used to work in a cube.

  
  

  Don't get discouraged where you are, and I agree that it's not a great idea to start a career you can't see yourself in. H did that working in taxes, and he got way too comfortable, even though he HATED it.

  
  

  I think the most important thing is to really focus on where you want to be, all while being mindful that it could change throughout the years - and that's ok! Once you decide a direction, you will be able to more clearly see your options.
  

  
  

  Good luck! 

  It was a fairytale.

  Report1 Reply
• SapphireCounselor member

  

  June 2013

  Wow, this is a lot. I can definately hear that you are frustrated with where you are in your career at this point. I can also hear pride in that you know you do what you do very well - to the best of your ability regardless of whether you like it or not. You also aren't scared of hard work, but value your own time enough not to transfer to another career that you don't really want. You have self-confidence and self-efficacy. Those are very positive attributes that you shouldn't dismiss.

  It definately sounds like what you are craving right now is some kind of plan that will lead you to the pot at the end of the rainbow so to speak, even if you don't know exactly what that looks like at this time. (That's okay.) It sounds like your are somewhat interested in art, and if you had your way would be something in that realm but are having a very difficult time making that happen because you didn't have the opportunity to intern as other, more priviledged, students did. It also sounds like your grades may be holding you back. I would caution you about letting that stand in your way too much though, because at some point the work experience matters more than the GPA...especially since you have been working very hard, just not in your desired field. You do have the degree, after all.

  My suggestion would be to visit a career counselor. These are exactly the kind of dilemmas that they can help you make sense of. Have you ever done any career testing, for example? This can be a great place to start if you truly have no idea what you would like to be doing. You could also start small - volunteering for a local art museum, etc, on the weekends for a few hours just to see how you like it. Even those kinds of experience can build until they are something that might help get you foot in the door.

  Good luck!

  

  Report1 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013 edited June 2013

  cwaggoner- Thanks so much, its good to hear that I shouldn't be discouraged.   I'm glad things have all worked out well for you and yours, I hope they do for me as well. It definitely helps put things in perspective.   

  Report0 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  You make good points.  I did the whole career advising thing while in college and right after graduation with my schools career office, but they weren't very helpful.  They only seemed helpful to people that already had a good start/idea where they were going.  I felt somewhat blown off by them, mainly because of my grades and the fact that I didn't have 10 internships under my belt (I went to a highly respected college full of overachievers, while my professors were all amazing, inspiring, and helpful in their own ways, advising definitely seemed to overlook those who weren't the best and brightest representations of the school, sadly) The placement test I took basically pointed towards social work...which while it makes sense given my personality, being a social worker specifically I just don't feel is right.  An acquaintance is in that field and while I admire him for it, I find it terribly depressing... but it does tell me that I belong somewhere where I feel I'm contributing something positive to people's lives, so there's that.  I think you're right though, I probably should give career advisement another try, from another source. Thanks for the advice, and your thorough understanding.

  Report0 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  Birdie, I'm sorry to hear you're facing a similar conundrum but, it is comforting and inspiring  to know that I'm not alone and that even though you're in that position you're still hopeful and upbeat about it. It must suck so much to hear that you're over-educated yet not qualified.  It sounds like you are on the right path though, good luck to you too! 

  
  

  All this really makes me think that higher education should involve a lot more career exploration over the first year as part of standard curriculum rather than just being loaded down with pre-req courses.  It sounds like more people could benefit from having extra time to acquire in-depth info pertaining to what is involved and required of any given career path.  It's hard to do it on your own over the course of 4 years of rigorous study. Especially since its pretty much required that you pick a major by the 2nd year, it's easy to get nailed down into something that may not be the best fit.  Or miss out on some of the things one ought to be doing to help their chances upon graduation.   

  Report0 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  Yeah I get that I need to pick something and go for it.  The problem is knowing which thing to pick, as far as being suitable for me, and me for it, or which is the most possible at this point.  While being able to just pick up and go back to school would help a whole lot, financially it just wouldn't be a good plan right now, or anytime in the near future.  I'm really hesitant to add on to my education debt for something that will likely not amount to the kind of pay that would help us get out of the hole in a timely manner.  Preschool teachers don't exactly make bank.  You're totally right about pursuing whatever I pick full force though.  I just find it extremely intimidating.     

  Report0 Reply
• staar987 member

  

  June 2013

  I don't have a ton of advice but I just want to say that it is kind of scary to pick a career. I understand. I went to school to be an x-ray technician and did that for 6 years. I loved the job. Then I realized that I didn't want to do it forever and wouldn't be able to due to the field changing so much. I didn't really want to get involved with how it was changing. So I picked something that I have an interest in right now. I am lucky enough that H is able to pay the bills while I go back to school again. Sometimes it scares me. Will I be good at this? Is this right for me? Will I enjoy doing it? What if in 10 to 20 years it may not be what I want to do anymore? The good news is I'm not tied to the career forever.

  I'm with @tarradesign on picking something related to a field and trying to get a job there. You want to be a preschool teacher? Get a job in a school office. It will give you an idea if this is something you want to do. If it isn't, fine. Try one of the other paths you are looking at.

  Personal story: I was in community college after I graduated high school. I had no idea what I wanted to do. I was just taking general classes and hoping something would spark my interest. I had connections to a medical office. They needed some temporary help doing some stupid menial project. I went for it. I realized I liked the medical field while at the temp job and got promoted to x-ray darkroom assistant. That is when I found out I loved x-ray. So I went to school to be an x-ray tech. I worked at that place for 8 years. That temp job helped me find a passion for something.

   

  Report1 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  Thanks ladies, you're giving me the push I need.  It helps just to know people understand and have been down this road and ended up doing just fine.

  Report0 Reply
• swimmy1988 member

  

  June 2013

  I'm in a similar situation. I just graduated with my Master's in Nutrition. To be a registered dietitian, they require you to have an internship under your belt. After my undergrad, I took a year off to figure out what I wanted to do, then I went back for my Master's. I didn't get into an internship.
  
  So now I'm struggling with finding a job in that field, it seems like I'm over-educated but under-qualified as well. And it's frustrating.
  I hope someday a company will let me work up to being a Nutrition professional. I just have to find that "in" somewhere
  

  
  

  Married as of June 22, 2013!!!
  

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• MoonlightSilver member

  

  June 2013

  Oh sweetie, I am RIGHT THERE with you. I have a Managerial Economics degree and I'm trying to get into women's non-profits and social media / communications. I waitressed in college because I needed money and only had one tiny internship. I'm right there with you regretting my college choices. I'm working in retail and have been treading water trying to figure out how to get my foot in the door of what I think I want to do.

  
  

  My suggestion is to look at your finances. Are you able to cut back hours at work a bit to give yourself some time to do non-paid things? Can you spend the summer saving up and then cut back expenses and do some exploring? Get that in order first.

  
  

  Then, hunt down the volunteering opportunities in areas you think you could be interested in. Art and working with children seems to be your two big areas of interest, yes? I'd look for blogging opportunities related to art, volunteering at local galleries (this is where you change your paid hours to accommodate your unpaid career experience), working or volunteering at after school programs, things like that. Is there any place near you that teaches art or music to children? Could you get a job or volunteer there?  

  
  

  It sucks financially, but unpaid work in your career field will buff up your resume. And really, experience is what people want- they don't care about your grades. As long as you can manage to return phone calls and write with limited grammar / spelling errors, they really don't care. I've been blogging and running a facebook page- all for free- in order to make my resume look better (and because I enjoy it, it's what I want to be paid to do!). 

  
  

  I've been out of school a year and a half now, and I just started an unpaid internship in my career field this summer. It's really tough to be in this position, when I wish I was in a full time paid job, but I'm doing what I have to in order to work my way up there. You'll find your way too, it just might take longer than your parents think it should.

  Married Bio - Now w/ Pro Pics
  
  June 2012 Bride!

  Report2 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013 edited June 2013

  I tried to volunteer with the major art museum here, specifically with their children's program. It took them a year to finally accept me to come in for orientation.  However, the hours required were on a specific day and time of the week, every week and by that point I no longer had those hours free.  Now that I'm going to be looking for a new job, I can try to work it so that I'll have those specific hours free, however I have to go through the reapplication process all over again and there may not be an open volunteer slot again.  Alternatively I could do misc volunteer work with them, and the scheduling is much more flexible, but again apparently volunteer spaces are quickly filled. I'll just have to keep trying.  I also tried getting in touch about volunteering with several small local galleries, however the response I got was overwhelmingly that they are being flooded with volunteers in the form of current art students who weren't accepted for the highly competitive internship positions. I never thought it would be so difficult to get someone to take free work, but I guess supply exceeds demand at the moment.  

  
  

  I have been researching some local preschools and found a couple that have a huge emphasis on art education, which seems right up my alley, plus they have open teaching assistant positions that don't necessarily require certification if there is relevant experience.  I think having an art background plus 10 years working with children gives me a pretty good shot.  I think my next step would be to apply for these positions, as well as any others that come up over the summer.  If I'm not hired, I'll just keep nannying and keep looking into volunteer.  Who knows, maybe even some of the schools might need volunteers. 

  
  

  I think you guys are right about trying to just get my foot in the door somewhere doing volunteer work or with whatever related entry-level that arises.  Unfortunately financially we can't afford for me to cut back on my hours without an increase in pay, but the free time to volunteer  is there if I find a spot that works around my job schedule.  I just need to keep looking.  Also, I can continue working in the restaurant a few days a week like I've been doing and maybe start training to tend bar.  If I'm going to be working there anyway, I may as well be building my skill set. Plus, even if I don't decide to go into the industry for good, I can make a hell of a lot more money bartending until I do move on to whatever else.  It's also a great job to have on the side if say, a good opportunity like assistant teaching arises, but doesn't necessarily pay adequately or enough hours.  The more I think about it, I think the next year will provide a good opportunity to feel out my different options.  Then I can start narrowing down my focus depending on what seems to be working out well.  I just have to make myself stick some fingers in pies.  My heart isn't set on any one thing just yet, and after hearing from all of you I feel a lot less pressure to pick one thing, as long as I am doing more to actively pursue any of these things.  Time isn't weighing so heavily on me now... so thank you all for that.  

  Report0 Reply
• winelover123 member

  

  June 2013

  I understand. I'm right where you're at right now. I've been searching high and low for any job in my field that I'm even partly qualified for - they are impossible to find. Don't get discouraged! I agree with stage manager that a job in sales is going to look better on your resume than a nannying job. 

  Report0 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  I'm being so long winded, sorry about that. It is just really nice to be able to voice my thoughts to people that are understanding and helpful.  On that note, anyone have any really stellar interview/resume  advice? Like I said, I have a hard time voicing what I feel are my selling points without feeling like I'm being too cliche and trite.  Also, the standard interview questions that most employers ask feel a lot to me like standardized testing, which I'm horrible at; you are just trying to give them the answers they are looking for.  How can one stand out when you're just answering a load of standard questions that everyone has the same "right" answer for. "der...my negative traits..I'm TOO much of a perfectionist, bler, bler, bler"  I would rather skip the bullshit questions and just be allowed to speak frankly about why I want the job and would be good for it. By the time we've gotten there in the interviews I have had, I feel like my awkwardness with questions like "What is the most positive work experience you've had?" has thrown me off my game.  And this is WITH practicing and considering answer to possible questions before hand.  I hate interviews so much, I'm way too introverted for this shit.  I wish I could interview via email, then just meet up with them for coffee or something.  I'm so bad at talking to people when it comes to trying to make myself look good.  This is why I'm so glad to be done with dating, well, plus having lucked out finding my dream fella.  

  Report0 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  Moonlight BTW, I LOVE that you were able to get married at an aquarium.  What an awesome pic. 

  Report1 Reply
• SapphireCounselor member

  

  June 2013

  Glad you are feeling more confident about the opportunities out there! I think art education is an amazing avenue to get into. I still remember my school art teacher. She was my favorite teacher when I was a kid. In terms of advice regarding interviews, the trick is to use the standard questions to your advantage. This may sound odd, but if you can brainstorm talking points that you want to make sure the hiring committee knows, then you can simply work them into your responses to those stock questions. These should include your own strengths as you see them, but also things you love about the company itself, i.e. why you'd like to work there and what you want to get out of it. That's an approach that may not work for everyone, but I know it works for me. And it helps to organize your own thoughts so that you don't simply draw a blank when you're nervous during the actual interview. Just remember to own the fact that you have worked very hard over the last few years! Think about all the transferable skills you already have and sell those. Also make sure to have a resume and cover letter you feel really good about.
  

  

  Report0 Reply
• wittykitty14 member

  

  June 2013

  I'm not sure anything I can say will be of use to you, but I hope this helps in some way!

  I understand your struggles.  My major in college was music performance, which, at the bachelors level doesn't qualify me to do much of anything.  What am I qualified to do?  I can, you know, sing you a song.  Because my college was so shitty, I didn't get the necessary training required to actually teach private voice lessons, although I could get away with it.  I've always known that my degree is nothing but a door to grad school, which is what I'll be starting in the fall.  But this time, I'm studying music therapy, which has been my ultimate goal for a while.  I completely understand what it's like to feel like you have a useless degree.

  My parents got married young-my mom was just 17.  They struggled A LOT.  My mom took some college classes here and there, but stopped once she started a family, when she was about 21-22.  My dad had a steady job, and she did everything she could to work in her desired field.  She knew since she was little that she wanted to be a nurse more than anything.  She had a lot of shitty jobs, but by the time I was little, she was working as a receptionist at the hospital and also worked on the rescue squad as an EMT.  I'm the youngest, and she had me at 29.  Once I was in school, she was finally able to do what she wanted to.  She was able to go to school, and became an RN was she was about 35 or 36.  I can tell she's much happier.  It took her a long time, but she stuck with it, and eventually got where she wanted to be.  It was worth the wait.

  I don't know what else to say besides figure out what you want to do.  Where do you want to end up?  What can you see yourself doing and enjoying?  Is this an attainable goal?  Once you can get a clear idea of where you want to end up, then you can figure out the steps to make that happen.  If you need to go back to school, be absolutely certain of what you want to do.  Don't make the same mistakes that my FI did.  He was going after 3 degrees, and they were hard degrees to go after.  He couldn't fully decide what to do.  He also didn't want to drop a degree once he started working on it, even if he knew it wasn't relevant to his goals anymore.  He now regrets this.  5 years of college later, the government refused to give him any more money (they changed a law about it, and no one told him before it was too late).  He couldn't afford college anymore, and had to drop out after 5 years, and has absolutely nothing to show for it.  He was relatively close to finishing all these degrees, but now he has nothing.  We're paying student loans out the ass, for nothing.  It's awful.

  So, I've told you a few stories.  I hope that in some way they'll be helpful!  I wish you the best of luck, OP!

  Report0 Reply
• BostonGIrl4732 member

  

  June 2013

  One thing that I got from the post is that you feel pressure to figure things out.  I view careers like I view men.  I don't think there is ONE man, or ONE career that's absolutely perfect for you.  There are men/careers that are good fits, and some that are horrible fits.  But just like there are many fish in the sea, there are also many careers.

  
  

  It's not about picking the best career for you.  It's about picking something that's right for you.  And there could be several.  I have yet to meet a single person who loves every single aspect of their job.  There are always going to be hard days, or things about your job that isn't perfect.  I think as long as you generally enjoy what you're doing, it makes it easier to get through the hard days and go back to having good days.

  
  

  So do what you think you're going to love, but understand you may love something else too.  It's just a choice you have to make.  I like my job.  Is it what would make me happiest?  Probably not.  I can think of a bunch of things I'd love to do with my life.  Will I pursue those things?  Maybe, maybe not.  Right now, I'm happy where I am.  You'll get there :-)

  Report2 Reply
• StarkKitten member

  

  June 2013 edited June 2013

  If you don't interview well, try the career center at your college!  They have staff that are there to help you gain interview skills, no matter your age or your graduation date!

  
  

  Also, getting a job in a certain career field may be harder based on where you are.  I have a lot of engineering/technical work around me, but there's only one big art museum in the area.  All other art-based things are privately owned or rented spaces.  Getting an administrative role with a company that does work you're interested in could allow you opportunity to learn about the field on-the-job and management might be willing to cross-train you to make a lateral move from admin to what you want to do.  GL!

  

  Report0 Reply
• HopefulKitten member

  

  June 2013

  One piece of advice for interviews that I've heard and used is when they ask what your greatest weakness is, also throw in a sentence about how you are working to improve it. For example, my weakness is I tend to nit-pick details on projects. It's important with my job to be detailed oriented, but there is a line between being detailed oriented and nit-picking. Throughout my time at my company, I've learned that it takes far less of the company's time, and mine, to simply ask my manager if this detail is important or if I should just move on.
  

  

  Report0 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  Thanks, you all make such good points.  I'm feeling much better about things, even if I still feel somewhat clueless as to where I will actually be in a year from now.  I'm definitely considering everything you've all said, and it is so helpful.  I really appreciate you all!

  
  

  And some good news! I stopped by a local preschool today to see about their openings for next year.  I was able to talk to one of the directors briefly to find out about their needs and application process.  She asked a little about my background and after giving her a brief run down of my time spent working with kids, she encouraged me to apply, especially because I studied art in school.  Apparently they are really looking for someone with a solid art background as they want to build that aspect of their program beyond finger painting and macaroni necklaces.  So it sounds really promising!  The only thing is that this specific position isn't technically available yet, as it is a new one that is still waiting for budget approval...but she seemed confident it would be.  They have a general teachers assistant position that will be opening up as well though. Getting started on my resume ASAP. yay!

  Report0 Reply
• laylasaurus member

  

  June 2013

  Also, I've got to commend FI.  He asked me what I've been spending so much time on TK about, so I explained I was trying to get advice about all this and how I've been really concerned and upset about it lately.  I also admitted to feeling like I wasn't keeping up with him or bringing as much to the table, as he is so talented, passionate, and gaining success at what he does, on top of just loving his job in general. His response was so perfect... "Sweetness, you are crazy intelligent, the nicest woman I've ever met, endlessly entertaining, and you've never once shied away from a hard day's work. I'm the fucking lucky one here. You are going to be amazing at whatever you decide to do.  I don't care what it is, all I care about is that you do what makes you happy.  I don't care if how long it takes you to figure it out, you know I've got your back."  

  
  

  I melted into tears and gave him a long, wet, snotty kiss.  and to think, not 30 minutes prior to this I was yelling at him "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?"  (he walked/danced backwards into an end table, and crashed ass first through the glass top...I don't even...I'm just glad he wasn't injured) 

  Report0 Reply