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Just Engaged and Proposals
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Dilemmas...

bride2b71614bride2b71614 member
500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
in Just Engaged and Proposals
Hi everyone!
I'm engaged and I couldn't be happier! I feel fortunate to have found such a wonderful partner. That being said, we have only told my immediate family, and a few close family members on his side (mother,father,sister). 

Recently there has been a lot of drama within his family. His immediate family expressed concerns about spreading the news due to the seriousness of the drama. One of his cousins wound up in the hospital due to a car accident (currently in a coma), another had a psychotic break, and his other cousin got engaged to a young woman that his family doesn't like. 

While I want to scream about my engagement from the rooftops I am worried that due to the circumstances its too risky at this time. Any advice on how to proceed? 
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Re: Dilemmas...

  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    Congratulations on your engagement. 

    I'm sorry his family is going through so many trials right now. That has to be hard on everyone. 

    If you've told his immediate family, do you really need to announce it to everyone else right away? When we got engaged, my fiance told his parents and brother and pretty soon everyone in his extended family knew without us doing a thing. Engagement news spreads like wildfire. 

    I don't think announcing your engagement would be "too risky," but I think calling up his aunts, uncles and cousins at such a hard time would be pretty insensitive. Just sit back and I'm sure his family will spread the news along their usual channels. 
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  • CLoGreenEyesCLoGreenEyes member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    Ditto the above, although I can't imagine anybody reacting badly to receiving some happy news in the family.

    Also, congratulations!
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  • NOLAbridealmostNOLAbridealmost member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary Name Dropper
    Don't worry about it!  If his immediate family already knows I don't see any reason not to proceed with your engagement as normal.   If his extended family finds out along the way, they'll likely be happy for you. 
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  • bride2b71614bride2b71614 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    Thank you so much! I never really thought of it that way. I am just glad that everyone is doing well as of now, and I actually received a congratulations from the cousin in a coma's father. He also said that he was happy that there was some good news for the family. I am glad that it all worked out in the end!  
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  • tiny specktiny speck member
    1000 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    Yeah I wouldn't worry about it. Let him and his family tell or not tell extended family as they see fit. Don't let this put a damper on your excitement. You can still share your news with all your friends and family (I don't see why you shouldn't). Congratulations! :)
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  • mmmiler346mmmiler346 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its
    I would go about the engagement as you please. It is your time so enjoyment. To much sneaking around and secrecy will take a toll no you two. Plus they will find out eventually and most likely be hurt you did not tell them.
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  • KellyVarellas26KellyVarellas26 member
    10 Comments
    Congratsss!!! I'm sorry to hear about the dilemma going on.
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  • suzyk723suzyk723 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its First Answer
    Maybe happy news is just what everyone needs to hear.
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