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Paying for Out of Town Guests?

CoeurCoeur member
10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I'll be getting married in a different state than we live.  Regardless of where we would've chosen to be married, many of my guests would've been traveling from out of town.  Someone at work told me today that, traditionally, the bride's family pays for accommodations of anyone coming from out of town.  I've never heard of this... is this real life?
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Re: Paying for Out of Town Guests?

  • Summer2011BrideSummer2011Bride member
    5000 Comments Third Anniversary 25 Love Its Combo Breaker
    They are incorrect. It is not your responsibility to pay for guests' travel arrangements.


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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
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    No.  While the bride, groom, and/or their families might arrange for blocks of hotel rooms to be available at discounted rates, anyone coming in from out of town is responsible for the costs of their own accommodations and transportation.
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  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary

    This isn't common at all.

    I do know it was somewhat of a tradition in super wealthy families in the past (might still be, I don't know.

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  • CoeurCoeur member
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    Oh thank goodness.  That was about to get very interesting, budget-wise.
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  • RedJacks25RedJacks25 member
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    We've decided that we'll be paying for accommodations for our out-of-town guests, which should only be FI's father, grandmother, and a couple of dear friends of ours. If it were going to be more people, we wouldn't be able to manage doing it, but as it stands we want to.
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  • hockey20hockey20 member
    10 Comments First Anniversary 5 Love Its

    We've got several out of town guests coming to our wedding, but we're strictly paying a night at the hotel from the groomsman and his family and my bridesmaid and her family. We look at is as a thank you to them for being part of our day, especially as the groomsman and family are coming from the Ottawa area (we're in Alberta)

    My mom is one of the OOT guests, and we just cannot afford to pay for her or anyone else to stay in a hotel/motel, while I love everyone who's coming, the funding isn't there for that.

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  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
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    Definitely not correct. No one is going to side-eye you for not picking up their hotel tab.
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  • CoeurCoeur member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Well, except for my one co-worker I guess.  Haha
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  • daria24daria24 member
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    I've only heard of this in a few other countries. I know one of the girls on my month board was battling her MIL from Taiwan about the same issue.

    But it's definitely not a rule in the US.
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  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
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    Coeur said:
    Well, except for my one co-worker I guess.  Haha
    hahah yes - except for him/her. Oh well! :)
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  • winelover123winelover123 member
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    Nope - if you have the budget to pay for people, that's nice but definitely not expected.
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  • harper0813harper0813 member
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    Is this particular coworker invited? Sounds like he/she was trying to get a free hotel room!
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  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
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    Your coworker is silly. I never expect the couple to pay for my travel expenses. 
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  • CoeurCoeur member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Well this is a big relief.  I've been realizing there's a lot of specific wedding etiquette I didn't know about, and I've been trying to keep things just right... not easy to do!
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  • smith5jmsmith5jm member
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    daria24 said:
    I've only heard of this in a few other countries. I know one of the girls on my month board was battling her MIL from Taiwan about the same issue. But it's definitely not a rule in the US.

    This is true- my fiancé is Indian and his parents are paying for the arrangements for all of their OOT guests. They were very confused when I created an insert for the invites with the hotel room block info for my OOT guests lol.
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