Wedding Rituals

southernbelle0915 · June 2013

Our officiant gave us a list of wedding rituals (the sand, the tying of the hands, warming of the rings, etc.) in case we wanted to include one. We both really liked the one where you write each other a letter, put it in a box and then open it either on your first anniversary, your fifth, whatever. So the officiant explains it in the context of this being symbolic of reminding each other why you made the decision to get married and your love for each other. I thought the idea was cool and I want to do it, but my question to you all is have you ever seen this done? I never have. What are your thoughts?

tiny speck · June 2013

I haven't seen it either. If it's something you want to do, go for it, but I am honestly not a fan of these kinds of extra things added to the ceremony. And I wouldn't call them rituals either (I think of deeply significant and traditional religious aspects of weddings when I think of "rituals").

ghettolobster · June 2013

I've never heard of it, but it sounds sweet.

tiny speck · June 2013

StageManager14 said:

I haven't seen it either. If it's something you want to do, go for it, but I am honestly not a fan of these kinds of extra things added to the ceremony. And I wouldn't call them rituals either (I think of deeply significant and traditional religious aspects of weddings when I think of "rituals").
For some couples, many of the things listed as "unity ceremonies" ARE rituals by your definition. Just because they don't fit into your idea of ritual based on your beliefs doesn't mean they aren't deeply significant religious or spiritual aspects for those who perform them.

Ok, that's definitely a fair point! I see now that I didn't word that in a way that was sensitive to others. I guess what I actually mean is that I associate "rituals" with "religion," which obviously not everyone else does. Sorry if I offended anyone, that was not my intention

easilyunamused · June 2013

We are doing this with a wine box. Honestly, when we decided to do it, it wasn't a "trend". But we are writing love letters and locking the box during the ceremony and our officiant will explain it. We also are keeping a copy of our vows on there as well.

DiamondMinx · June 2013

I think it sounds sweet. Personally, we're doing the ritual of the 6 cords and jumping the broom - we're both of irish descent, and I love the sentiment of the 6 cord ritual, which is much more blunt about the fact that marriage takes work than "better or for worse".

LDubHawksFan · June 2013

Bmarie1316 said:
We are doing this with a wine box. Honestly, when we decided to do it, it wasn't a "trend". But we are writing love letters and locking the box during the ceremony and our officiant will explain it. We also are keeping a copy of our vows on there as well.

Same here. We did it and I loved it but it meant something really special to me and wasn't a sort of filler part of the ceremony. My family has a lot of divorce so if we ever fall on hard times together where we are questioning whether we can make it, we will open the box and remember exactly why we committed to one another. We aren't opening it until our 10 year because we wanted to make it a milestone Ann. (Yes, we got a wine that SHOULD age well and not be vinegar by then). Including the vows would have been a nice touch; maybe we will add them to the box in 9+ years!

Wedding Rituals

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