Tuxes, Suits, or Sport Jackets?

daniellebisson · June 2013

My fiance and I are going to have a outdoor fall wedding in New England. We want it to be nice, and we want it to be somewhat formal, but we're trying to veer away from the more decadent and traditional weddings that his family in NJ has done. We've been trying to plan for a more rustic and outdoorsy feel. One of our major tasks for right now is to pick out what our wedding party will be wearing. For the guys, we've been thinking about doing a brown/tan tux or suit, and we've also kicked about the idea of doing a sport jacket with a little more texture to it - maybe something tweed.

Having said that, it looks like it's not easy to rent sport jackets, and my fiance is a little concerned that they might be a little too casual. Does anybody have input on this? We'd likely be trying to rent out of northern NJ, where his family lives.

itzMS · June 2013

I've also seen grey suits done at outdoor weddings, and it looks quite nice. I'd skip the brown or tan.

satinwinter0308 · June 2013

Tuxedos can be worn any time of the day at any time of the year. There are new grey styles out that are less formal - with less satin, which give more of a really nice suit look. There are also some really great tan and brown rentals.

You probably won't be able to find tweed jackets to rent...what are your girls wearing? The pattern in tweed might distract from everything else in pictures....however you can just rent navy or black jackets.

Check out these two rental websites:
http://www.sarnoandson.com/default.aspx?
http://www.jimsformalwear.com/default.htm

Most tuxedo & suit rental stores get thier stock from these two wholesalers. You can even search for a store in your area. Tux shops are not like dress shops, there shouldn't be any pressure and you should be able to ask them to order in a sample.

STARMOON44 · June 2013

I think a nice gray suit would be perfect.

Dincognito · June 2013

The tweed sport coat historically came from country attire, and were not typically worn in the city. Though they've gained widespread acceptance over the years, I don't think their level of formality has increased to match the gravity of the occasion. That said, I love tweed, and if you want a very casual/rustic wedding, I actually love the idea.

Liatris is absolutely correct about tuxedos (see the Black Tie Guide website), but midnight blue is an accepted alternative to black, and contrasts slightly less starkly (is that a word?). See the one worn in the movie Skyfall for reference.

Another option that falls somewhere between suit and tuxedo is the dinner jacket, which is admittedly more casual (yet formal LOL).

A grey or navy suit is also a great option, which frees you from the rules of formal wear to a degree. If purchasing is an option, a well tailored suit will always look better than an ill fitting rental, and that should be a grave concern based on 99% of the wedding pictures I've seen in my lifetime LOL

premv2014 · June 2013

It's like "What kind of wine goes with a certain kind of food?" It's whatever suits YOUR taste.

So it is with tuxedos. The difference between a tux and a suit is miniscule and that difference is in the way that it is accessorized (bowties vs. long ties).

Go with what you like. Enjoy the special day. Don't worry about the snobs and just have fun!

KatWAG · June 2013

kmasliuk said:

Tuxedos can be worn any time of the day at any time of the year. There are new grey styles out that are less formal - with less satin, which give more of a really nice suit look. There are also some really great tan and brown rentals.

You probably won't be able to find tweed jackets to rent...what are your girls wearing? The pattern in tweed might distract from everything else in pictures....however you can just rent navy or black jackets.

Check out these two rental websites:
http://www.sarnoandson.com/default.aspx?
http://www.jimsformalwear.com/default.htm

Most tuxedo & suit rental stores get thier stock from these two wholesalers. You can even search for a store in your area. Tux shops are not like dress shops, there shouldn't be any pressure and you should be able to ask them to order in a sample.

There is so much wrong with the bolded statement.

A little help, @CMGr?

itzMS · June 2013

premv2014 said:

It's like "What kind of wine goes with a certain kind of food?" It's whatever suits YOUR taste.

So it is with tuxedos. The difference between a tux and a suit is miniscule and that difference is in the way that it is accessorized (bowties vs. long ties).

Go with what you like. Enjoy the special day. Don't worry about the snobs and just have fun!

I do agree with your post to extent that the world definitely won't end if someone wears a tuxedo to an event before 6:00 in the evening.

But @premv2014, you should make sure you're providing proper information before making statements like the bolded.

The difference between a tuxedo and a suit is certainly not in the tie choice.

A tuxedo has satin accents (lapels, buttons, stripe on leg of pants), whereas a suit does not.

Men can wear bowties or long ties with tuxedos or suits.

ashleyep · June 2013

Liatris2010 said:

kmasliuk said:

Tuxedos can be worn any time of the day at any time of the year. There are new grey styles out that are less formal - with less satin, which give more of a really nice suit look. There are also some really great tan and brown rentals.

You probably won't be able to find tweed jackets to rent...what are your girls wearing? The pattern in tweed might distract from everything else in pictures....however you can just rent navy or black jackets.

Check out these two rental websites:
http://www.sarnoandson.com/default.aspx?
http://www.jimsformalwear.com/default.htm

Most tuxedo & suit rental stores get thier stock from these two wholesalers. You can even search for a store in your area. Tux shops are not like dress shops, there shouldn't be any pressure and you should be able to ask them to order in a sample.

No, no, no!

Tuxes are formal evening attire and should always be black. Remember your parents' wedding photo? I remember mine, and my father is wearing a power-blue tux. It looks terrible. Grey tuxedos will be the powder blue tuxedos of our generation. Don't do it.

So this is a no-go then? I like the idea of grey suits (and my FI does too) but I'd feel bad asking his groomsmen to buy a suit. I think this is a men's warehouse Tux, but it's the closest I can find to a suit rental. Maybe just ditch the vest? No?

My dad got married in a grey tux in the 80s, but I've always thought it was tail and cut that made it look dated, not the color.

itzMS · June 2013

@ashleyep, In my area, most tuxedo rentals cost $150+...and an excellent quality suit (think Calvin Klein, etc) that can be used again will be $150-$200 if you buy on sale.

In your case, the guys could even buy one online from Target for under $100, which is cheaper than a tux rental!

http://www.target.com/p/merona-men-s-suit-separates-grey/-/A-12169606#prodSlot=large_1_9

ashleyep · June 2013

itzMS said:

@ashleyep, In my area, most tuxedo rentals cost $150+...and an excellent quality suit (think Calvin Klein, etc) that can be used again will be $150-$200 if you buy on sale.

In your case, the guys could even buy one online from Target for under $100, which is cheaper than a tux rental!

http://www.target.com/p/merona-men-s-suit-separates-grey/-/A-12169606#prodSlot=large_1_9

Thanks! I didn't realize rentals were quite that much. I'm looking for a lighter grey, but I can keep my eyes out for a deal. We have plenty of time still.

Doing a quick search, Macy's has this CC one on sale for about $160!

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/calvin-klein-greystone-blazer-and-pants-suit-seperates?ID=781760&CategoryID=28171#fn=sp%3D1%26spc%3D29%26ruleId%3D5%26slotId%3D5

itzMS · June 2013

ashleyep said:

itzMS said:

@ashleyep, In my area, most tuxedo rentals cost $150+...and an excellent quality suit (think Calvin Klein, etc) that can be used again will be $150-$200 if you buy on sale.

In your case, the guys could even buy one online from Target for under $100, which is cheaper than a tux rental!

http://www.target.com/p/merona-men-s-suit-separates-grey/-/A-12169606#prodSlot=large_1_9

Thanks! I didn't realize rentals were quite that much. I'm looking for a lighter grey, but I can keep my eyes out for a deal. We have plenty of time still.

Doing a quick search, Macy's has this CC one on sale for about $160!

http://www1.macys.com/shop/product/calvin-klein-greystone-blazer-and-pants-suit-seperates?ID=781760&CategoryID=28171#fn=sp%3D1%26spc%3D29%26ruleId%3D5%26slotId%3D5

Just keep in mind if you're going to be terribly specific about the shade of grey, you and FI should consider purchasing the suits. Most guys can find "any grey suit" or "any black suit" in a pricepoint and style they like and would use again if they don't already own one. It will be much more challenging if you specify how light or dark it should be.

For example, my DH already owns a grey suit...but it isn't as light as the one in the picture you posted...so for him, buying a second, separate grey suit would be silly.

ashleyep · June 2013

Liatris2010 said:

That satin on the lapel is what makes it a no-go for me, not the vest.

We had our GM in grey suits of their own choosing. Some already owned grey suits, the rest bought new ones. Men's Warehouse has buy one, get one 50% off sales, and I know some of the guys went in together to get the deal. H got his suit from Dillards. It was 3 piece, on sale, and we had a coupon. It was not at all expensive, and he's worn it to two weddings since.

Thanks to both of you, that's what I figured.

Dincognito · June 2013

CMGr said:

Tuxedos should be black, and ONLY worn at formal occasions after 6:00 PM. They are only worn by adults. This rule has not changed. If a man wears a tuxedo in the daytime, he looks ignorant and foolish.
Suits are fine at any wedding, any time of day. They can be worn with a matching vest, or without one. They are never worn with colored satin vests.
Sports jackets can be navy, black or tweed. They are fine for less formal weddings, and can be purchased inexpensively at Kohl's, Penney's etc.
Vests should never be worn alone without a jacket. This makes a man look like a waiter in a pizza parlor! Shirtsleeves are also not appropriate during the ceremony, although it is fine for the men to take off their jackets and party at the reception.
Sorry for the delay. I have been visiting relatives

I like you.

(please forgive my formatting gaffe)

premv2014 · June 2013

Men's Wearhouse has an advertisement out now that shows gentlemen in a wedding wearing light grey tuxes. There are two possibilities. 1) Men's Wearhouse is "ignorant and foolish" or 2) There is a new paradigm that allows different colored tuxedos to be worn during the daytime, with or without vests. Which is it?

I'd think that chain store which invested tens of millions of dollars into the inventory and ad campaign did sufficient research to determine the present social acceptability of the advertised grey tuxedo (for example). And likely they know more about the issue than self-nominated fashion gurus on wedding message boards who seem to be entrenched in a bigoted opinion about styles and norms based on a bygone era.

manateehugger · June 2013

@CMGr thread-jacking a little bit here. What do you think about tuxes for a 4:00pm ceremony followed by a 5:30 cocktail hour and 6:30 dinner service start time?

My FI is dead-set on a tux (which is fine formality-wise for our wedding), but it makes me a little uneasy since our church ceremony is still technically afternoon.

MayaM85 · June 2013

The good thing about a grey suit is that the groomsmen can wear it again at another formal event or work event ( depending on the style) so you don't have to feel to bad with them buying a suit . I wouldn't go with the vest but the suit should be fitted and properly tailored with a crisp fitted whit shirt and a thin tie to give it that classic look

Dincognito · June 2013

premv2014 said:

Men's Wearhouse has an advertisement out now that shows gentlemen in a wedding wearing light grey tuxes. There are two possibilities. 1) Men's Wearhouse is "ignorant and foolish" or 2) There is a new paradigm that allows different colored tuxedos to be worn during the daytime, with or without vests. Which is it?
I'd think that chain store which invested tens of millions of dollars into the inventory and ad campaign did sufficient research to determine the present social acceptability of the advertised grey tuxedo (for example). And likely they know more about the issue than self-nominated fashion gurus on wedding message boards who seem to be entrenched in a bigoted opinion about styles and norms based on a bygone era.

If you Google how Men's Wearhouse is regarded on any gentlemen's forum you will find your answer. I think that "Dressing the Man" by Flusser is probably considered the best current resource and final word on the topic.

STARMOON44 · June 2013

Men's Warehouse: ignorant and foolish.

If he wants to wear grey in the daytime: awesome! It's called a suit. It shouldn't look like a tux in grey.

manateehugger · June 2013

Liatris2010 said:

@PDKH said:

@CMGr thread-jacking a little bit here. What do you think about tuxes for a 4:00pm ceremony followed by a 5:30 cocktail hour and 6:30 dinner service start time?

My FI is dead-set on a tux (which is fine formality-wise for our wedding), but it makes me a little uneasy since our church ceremony is still technically afternoon.

I'm not CMGr, but I'll answer. I am fine with this because the reception is in the evening. Yes technically the tux at 4 is inappropriate but since you don't have gap for him to go change (I'm assuming hour ceremony, then travel time to reception), and the tux he wants will be appropriate for the majority of the event, I think it is okay. This is an etiquette thing that has zero effect on the guests, so I think it is okay to bend the rules a bit. Just so long as his tux isn't grey, because I'm a big snob.

@Liatris2010 yay! That's what I kind of figured too, but I didn't know if my opinion was singular.

Silly FI just thinks you can't get married in anything but a "James Bond Tux."

Thanks for the input!

masdumas · June 2013

As one of the few men on this board, and a former aide-de-camp who indeed knows this protocol I will add my 2 cents. If your wedding is ultra formal - starting after 6, then PROPER dress isnt a dinner jacket, it's White or Black Tie and Tails. For Formal, event somewhere in the mid to late afternoon, but with dinner service for the reception, then Dinner Jacket, Black pants with side stripe, cummerbund or vest, and tie. The Jacket should have lapels that match the stripe and also your tie (be it grosgrain, silk or satin) Your jacket can come in Black or, in warmer weather, Cream (don't get white, it looks too severe)
Another option, but not one you can rent, is Midnight Blue - Under flouresencent light, that blue looks black, while Black has an odd greenish tint.
Grey is not a tuxedo option, unless you are special and have mastered the first 3 - it should not be rented as someone said it will be the powder blue of this generation.
If you are having a daytime wedding, you have a couple of options - for ultraformal , get morning clothes (see pictures of William,Prince or Harry, Prince); other wise get sharp suits -
as for your wedding - its ok to have differing shades of grey suits for the wedding - it actually looks better than super matchy - if you must have them match, get coordinating ties, pocket squares and socks -

Hope this helps

premv2014 · June 2013

I'll stipulate that Men's Wearhouse has no interest in the wedding as a special event and is in it only to grow their market share. I've said before that it's a terrible place to go to rent a tux. We went there and got lied to. That told me all that I needed to know about them.

MasDumas, just FYI - The tux place that we found (google-search) in Kennesaw, GA has a midnight blue tuxedo. And you're right - It looks black under flourescent light! The tux guy there showed it to us while explaining the different styles.

I'm not defending grey as a choice for a tux, only the right of the bride and groom on their most special day to make their decision based on how THEY want everything to look. And I think that it's harsh to call people who have ALREADY decided on light grey, "ignorant and foolish" (not us, by the way - we're going with evening tuxes in black with color-coordinating ties). Brides have enough to worry about without the added pressure of being snubbed because of their tux/suit choice.

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