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groomsmen and fathers

kristingregweddingkristingregwedding member
5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
in Attire & Accessories Forum
We picked out the tuxes that our groomsmen will be wearing for the wedding and also that our dads will be wearing.  Our groomsmen will have gray vests. We decided on black vests and ties for our dads.  Should our dads be in the same color as the groomsmen? 
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Re: groomsmen and fathers

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    bunni727bunni727 member
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    What do your dads want to wear? Are they in the wedding party?

    Our dads weren't part of the wedding party, so we didn't pick out their clothes or think they needed to match the GMs. My dad wore a gray suit he owned, FIL wore black slacks and a polo shirt, and the groomsmen wore tuxes. 
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    kristingregweddingkristingregwedding member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    They told us to pick out something for them to wear, so we went with the same tux as the GM. 
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    bunni727bunni727 member
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    What you have planned sounds fine to me. 
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    kristingregweddingkristingregwedding member
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    Thanks Bunni!
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    misssunshine17misssunshine17 member
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    If they asked, it's fine. It's when you require it, it's rude. My dad wants to wear the same thing as the BP, so he'll match my brother, so cool. 
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    mlg78mlg78 member
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    Our dads are in the same tuxes but charcoal vests instead of purple like the GM.
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    DincognitoDincognito member
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    Black is correct, but you may wish to consider cummerbunds to further differentiate them from the wedding party. 
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    kristingregweddingkristingregwedding member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    Why do the groomsmen have to be in black vests? I've never heard of that and only been to one wedding where the groomsmen were in black vests and that was because the wedding colors were black and pink.  Is this a rule that I am breaking? ( not that I am going to change the color but I am honestly curious because I have never heard of it!)  Hope that doesn't sound rude!!
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    DincognitoDincognito member
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    edited June 2013
    No, as I said, black cummerbunds are equally acceptable, though arguably more suited to shawl collars than to peak lapels. That said, I'd say that only a small percentage of weddings I've seen recently adhere to these rules. It's a slippery slope though.
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    kristingregweddingkristingregwedding member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    Oops, Dincognito, I was refering to Liatris who had mentioned that the vests should be the same color at the tuxes!! We are skipping cumberbunds because they had all said they would rather not wear them, and we don't want to force something that I know my fiance wouldn't want to wear haha!
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    bunni727bunni727 member
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    Just to be a proper tux, the vests should match.

    Some say colored vests look too prom-ish.

    It's not at all uncommon to have vests that coordinate with the wedding colors (our gms wore blue vests and ties), and since it's an aesthetic thing that doesn't affect anyone's comfort, it's not a rule that I care about. My H picked his and the groomsmen attire, and they wore blue vests with black tuxes. They also wore tuxes at 4pm while I wore a tea-length dress, so we're going to tux hell anyway. 
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    erinlin25erinlin25 member
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    our wedding party wore the charcoal tux from Men's Warehouse Vera Wang collection-- my husband wore the charcoal vest-- his groomsman wanted to wear the purple vest, so that is what they did.  My dad wanted to match the groomsman so he did.  They all looked great and the plum dresses my bridesmaids wore looked fabulous with the charcoal. 

    The whole the tux should be black thing is one of those traditional etiquette stipulations that are hit or miss and quite frankly forgiven IMO-- are you hurting anyone by wearing a charcoal tuxedo?  Call it a suit if its that big of a deal, but unless you are hosting a black tie wedding I see no issue in wearing the charcoal tuxedo.  Our wedding party looked awesome in their tuxedo's and received so many compliments.  Our guests were hosted very well and no one as offended the guys wore charcoal instead of black. 
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    kristingregweddingkristingregwedding member
    5 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary First Comment
    We have very dark gray vests so I think it won't be promish.. but I totally get what you are saying!
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