What traditional things are you skipping (or did you skip)?

AJuliaNJ · May 2013

Piggybacking on my last thread, I am skipping the bouquet toss. I had that planned before any other thing. I was 29 when I met FI so I had plenty of time to develop a hatred of this tradition.

I'm also skipping the table of gross lemony Italian desserts. I can't for the life of me remember what it's called but it's at many weddings and it's never very good. My mom was really pushing for it at first.

Jells2dot0 · May 2013

I did not do a garter toss or bouquet toss at my first wedding. I did not see the need. I may have skipped a few other things, but can't remember since it's been so long.

JoanE2012 · May 2013

We skipped the bouquet and garter toss. We didn't have a head table either.

AJuliaNJ · May 2013

Everyone's welcome here! We've thought about skipping the announcement, too. We were at a wedding where the bride and groom just walked in. I liked the more low key entrance. Everyone will notice that a woman in a big white dress has entered the room either way.

KatWAG · May 2013

Sleeper2013 said:

I will say that the one problem we had with no grand entrance or special seating was that we had a server who was supposed to be assigned to solely assist us. While he brought me plates of food and drinks all night, H didn't get that, apparently because he was hard to pick out among all the other suits. I ate a ton and got to try everything. There was some good stuff he missed out on though.

We had the same situation. H was hard to find a a sea of tuxes.

I skipped the garter and bouquet tosses. I also had a pretty extensive list of music not to be played at the wedding. No "shout" or the electric slide here!

lyndausvi · May 2013

We didn't have a bouquet or garter toss. I didn't even have a garter now that I think about it. We didn't have a head table per se either. The WP sat among the other tables with people they would have sat with if they were not in the wedding.

elizabetheleven · May 2013

We're not doing anything traditionally.
The guests are taking a boat to the island where the ceremony is taking place. So the boat has to come back to get my dad and I and instead of walking me down the aisle we will 'float' down lol
Afterwards we will all sip champagne and watch the sunset then take the boat to an awesome restaurant and have a kick ass dinner. No music at dinner, no dancing, no cake cutting. Just celebrating with family.

tammym1001 · May 2013

We aren't having either toss. We are also skipping the spotlight dances and head table. We're going back and forth on being announced. We are having a small wedding so everyone will know us. LOL

Jells2dot0 · May 2013

After reading the responses, it's jogged my memory. I also did not have any special announcement/entrance.

OjitosVerdes · June 2013

We're also skipping the garter/bouquet tosses and the head table. I'd prefer to not be announced, but FI, my bridesmaids and the groomsmen are all into it so I suppose I'll go along with it. I'd also prefer to skip the spotlight dances, but I think my dad and FI's mom would be hurt. Basically, I'd love to cut out anything that seems like it's some kind of production, but to keep the peace (my mother claims I'm "throwing all tradition out the window" :-S ) I'll probably compromise on a few things.

Gisellerina · June 2013

We are not having most of the traditional things - no announced entrance (I'm assuming I'll be the only person in a bridal gown, so it should be easy for everyone to figure out who we are), no spotlight dances, no speeches, no bouquet/garter toss. I really just want it to be a big dinner party with not too many "look at me" moments (great for others, but not for me).

We will have a toast and cake-cutting though. We are planning on a receiving line, mostly because I want to make sure my step-father has an opportunity to meet everyone. He's confined to a wheelchair, so he often ends up stuck in corners at parties.

thisismynickname2 · June 2013

Incidentally, this is my first marriage but my fiance's second. Apparently he had a very traditional first wedding because in the very beginning of planning, he'd ask things like, "well what about the head table? the grand entrance?" My response was basically < crickets >.

No bouquet toss: I'm 30 and among the last [of everyone that will be there] to marry; who would I toss it to? (Not to mention the frenzy of catching a bouquet feels very 1950's, like there's no greater achievement in life than to get married.)

No garter toss: I hate the idea of my husband going up my skirt in front of family and friends. I get where the tradition came from but nowadays it's done in a lewd and totally inappropriate manner.

No head table: those seated at the head table can really only talk to those directly on their left and right; plus, with couples, why split up the couples? I feel bad when a bridesmaid is separated from her husband, especially when husband barely knows any other guests and is stuck fending for himself for hours.

Grand entrance: debatable. It just seems too hard to coordinate. We're having ceremony and reception in one spot, and "hiding" until the grand entrance isn't really possible. I plan to work with the DJ to figure out some other way to introduce us and the bridal party.

Spotlight dances: it'll be our first dance, a dance with our parents, and that's it. I don't like it when there are special dances for "just the groomsman," "just the bridesmaids," "the whole bridal party!" and "all married couples!" because it feels so exclusionary. When guests don't fall into those categories, it's very awkward for them to stand on the sidelines.

Basically I want to get married, then eat, drink and be merry!

southernbelle0915 · June 2013

Definitely not doing the bouquet or garter toss.
We're also skipping MOH/BM toasts. My dad will be thanking everyone for coming and giving a very brief toast to get the party going.
We are not having assigned seating and are doing a strolling dinner.
We will not have a wedding cake - we hired a chocolatier to do a dessert bar.
We are closing down a bridge (rented from the city) for our ceremony - that's more offbeat than untraditional, I guess.
Not being announced - we feel like we will have already had this with the pronouncement after the vows/exchange of rings (we are NOT doing "man and wife")
Not doing favors

eas1223 · June 2013

We will have no garter/bouquet tosses, wedding party (yep, no bridesmaids/groomsmen), announcement for us at the reception, speeches, tiered cake (therefore also, no cake cutting), receiving line, poems/songs/readings during the ceremony, favors or programs.

GetThePointe77 · July 2013

i REALLY want to skip all this stuff but I feel like im getting a lot of pushback/disappointment from the families, especially the FIs...I am having a Wedding party, but I'd gladly skip the garter/bouquet tosses, the announcement at the reception, speeches, receiving line, favors, programs...anything that puts me at the center of attention really...

harper0813 · July 2013

We're skipping the tosses, dollar dance (tradition in my family, unfortunately), head table (doing a captain's table), Catholic ceremony, ushers, any symbolic "ceremonies" during the ceremony.

alm&mdm · July 2013

We are doing cocktail hour before the ceremony which isn't traditional. No formal announcements. No speeches, we're just going to briefly thank everyone and start dinner. No family dances. No tosses. No receiving line.

BulgariHeart · July 2013

We skipped having BMs/Groomsmen, speeches, getaway car, pre-wedding parties, sand/candle ceremony and receiving line. We did do the tosses (though they were staged/choreographed), dances, toasts, readings, speeches and all the things that kept us in the spotlight. We like being the center of attention

What traditional things are you skipping (or did you skip)?

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