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Guest List

KCLindgrenKCLindgren member
100 Comments First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
in Connecticut
Hello!!!  Married girls--how many guests did you allow your parents and his parents to invite?  Engaged girls--are you giving your parents a set number (say, inviting 20 of their friends)? 

My parents are really going overboard with who they want to invite to the wedding.  FI and I want to keep the guest list small.  We originally wanted a smaller venue with 65-75 guests (he and I have small extended families, so we were able to include everyone plus a few of our friends).  My parents doubled the guest list (no joke!  It's now at 130 people!).  All friends of theirs.  They justify it by saying "It's just a courtesy invite. Most of them won't actually come to the wedding."  This is really stressing me out! 

If it helps, my parents are not contributing to the cost of the wedding.

Advice?  Thanks.
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Re: Guest List

  • SB1512SB1512 member
    500 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    edited July 2013
    Since neither set of parents are contributing you and your FI have total control over the guest list.  I would sit down with FI and make a list of the people that must be there (friends and family).  See how many people that is.  Then, decide on X number to give your parents to invite.  Since you are paying, it can be as small as 10 people for each set of parents, or larger, it's really up to you.  It sounds like you do not want a large wedding, so I would stand firm on this number (in some cases posters are told that if they don't care about the number of people, but rather the cost than to explain to mom and dad that for every person over the allotted number they must pay X dollar amount if they want those extra guests there).  In my case, our parents paid for our wedding, so FI (now husband) and I had no real say in the guest list.  We invited close to 200 people, and our final guest count was around 112.

    edit: husbands parents guest list was a large chunk of courtesy invites that declined, thankfully (we wanted a smaller wedding).  However, you can't count on the oh they won't come phrase......some people crawl out of the woodwork for weddings!
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