this is the code for the render ad
Wedding Etiquette Forum

Did I screw up?

Hey guys,
My FI's cousin is getting married this weekend.  It is on the other side of the country and unfortunately we are unable to make it but I wanted to send them a gift.  I found their registry online, sent a gift with a "we are so sorry to have to miss the wedding but we wish you the best on your day!" type message.  After I sent it, it occurred to me that we never actually got an invitation.  We saw FI's aunt and uncle (parents of the groom) in June and they talked about how they wish we could come and they were excited to spend the time with family.  FI's parents received a print invitation.  The couple is quite young and the engagement and wedding all happened within a matter of several months so I'm thinking maybe FI and I were included on his parents invite (I never asked).  I know that is technically an etiquette breech but I'm not offended, as I don't think they would have realized that they were supposed to invite separately.  When they were first engaged, FI's uncle sent a message to the family announcing that the wedding would be in ___ state in ___ month.    Anyway, I guess my question is, was I wrong to assume we were invited and did I screw up by saying we were sad to miss the wedding?  I don't want them to feel embarrassed by the message!  

Re: Did I screw up?

  • Did you tell them you couldn't come when you spoke to the parents a few months back? Some people incorrectly think that you can skip sending invitations to people who tell you they can't make it in advance.
    At that point we were still trying to make it work so we told them we were hoping to be able to make it but we unsure.  
  • I don't think it's a big deal. Even if they weren't going to invite you, I don't think they would be embarrassed by the message, and I still think they would appreciate and enjoy your gift. 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    image
  • I'm like 99% sure they intended to invite us...I just didn't want my "wish we were there!" message to come off as "hey, wish you would have invited us!" because that is not how I meant it 
  • jss0302 said:

    My answer depends on if this wedding is taking place in a park.

    I also heard they the MOB subbed in NY Strip for filet so I mean...
    Do you think it would be bad if I asked why I wasn't invited? I mean, I've seen you post on TK and you know her, so I should totally be given an invite.
    especially because literally everyone else in the entire world was invited!  I mean, well...other people I know never got invitations...but seriously, everyone else ever was invited!  
  • You're overthinking this. Even if you weren't invited, you can't go anyway, and you'll never know one way or another if you were invited or not, so it's no big deal. 


    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards