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When to send what?

mrsjclmaxwellmrsjclmaxwell member
First Comment First Anniversary
in Wedding Invitations & Paper

Hi everyone! New bride here.

The wedding is on June 1st, 2014. I wanted the couples shower after christmas so it is on March 8th, 2014. So i have a lot of things to put in the mail lol.

When should i mail the STDates? I thought it was 6 months? And Im not sure on when to send anything else. Invites for shower, invites for wedding, when the RSVP date should be. Any etiquette is appreciated!

Thanks in advance!

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Re: When to send what?

  • MoxieMickieMoxieMickie member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    Normally you wouldn't mention the shower in STDs. The person who is hosting it (who will not be you or your FI) would send invitations several weeks in advance, based on the norms of your group.
    I think the norm for STDs is 6-9 months. Keep in mind everyone who receives an STD must receive an invitation even if your budget is decimated and you no longer socialize with them. Many do STDs only for out of owners or VIPs. You don't ask for RSVPs until the invitations. Your RSVP date is usually the date your vendors need final numbers plus a week or week and a half or so to track down stragglers.
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  • JoanE2012JoanE2012 member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    mrsjclmaxwell said:

    Hi everyone! New bride here.

    The wedding is on June 1st, 2014. I wanted the couples shower after christmas so it is on March 8th, 2014. So i have a lot of things to put in the mail lol.

    When should i mail the STDates? I thought it was 6 months? And Im not sure on when to send anything else. Invites for shower, invites for wedding, when the RSVP date should be. Any etiquette is appreciated!

    Thanks in advance!

    You don't mail invites for the couples shower.  Whoever is hosting takes care of that.  Please don't host your own shower.  

    We sent our STDs at 9 months before and invites 9 weeks before.  The RSVP date should be whatever date the venue needs final numbers + 1 extra week so you can call anyone that didn't respond.
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  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Hi there! My FI and I are getting married just a few weeks after you on the 28th.

    Ditto PP's - you can't host your own shower, so don't worry about those invitations. That's your host/hostess' job. 

    STD's can go out up to a year in advance, but usually go out 6-9 months. We are planning to send ours out mid-October. 

    Invites go out 6-8 weeks in advance usually. Try not to have your RSVP earlier than May 1st; see when your venue/caterer needs the final count. 

    Be sure you don't include ANY registry information in your STD or in your invitation. 

    image
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  • mrsjclmaxwellmrsjclmaxwell member
    First Comment First Anniversary

    Thanks everyone! I guess I could if specified a little more. My mother is hosting the couples shower and she didnt know when to send them. (this is a first for her as well) When she asked me, I had no clue so I posted.

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  • manateehuggermanateehugger member
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Gotcha. In that case, for shower invites, I believe the standard is four weeks.
    image
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