i already rsvp'd but i cant go.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

So I'm invited to a quince and I will be an OOT guest. We've been having financial struggles all year and things are getting worse each month. Last month I RSVP yes because we were almost out of a financial whole. Well June and July have been really bad for business. We might not be able to go but we are still trying to make the money to go. How should I let my possible future matron of honor I might not be able to.go?

MayDay513 · July 2013

GypsyBridetobe said:

So I'm invited to a quince and I will be an OOT guest. We've been having financial struggles all year and things are getting worse each month. Last month I RSVP yes because we were almost out of a financial whole. Well June and July have been really bad for business. We might not be able to go but we are still trying to make the money to go. How should I let my possible future matron of honor I might not be able to.go?

Just call her and tell her.

AddieCake · July 2013

By calling and saying you may not be able to go after all.

manateehugger · July 2013

If you don't have the money, you call her up ASAP and tell her you can't go. Explain the situation.

Don't tell her "Oh I may or may not show up" - that's rude.

QueerFemme · July 2013

Call her now and tell her. She may not have turned in her final headcount to the caterer yet and might be able to remove you.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

OK so call now. Got it. One more question. If I end up making money and can go,should I call her to let her know?

QueerFemme · July 2013

GypsyBridetobe said:

OK so call now. Got it. One more question. If I end making money and can go should I call her to let her know?

I mean, I am assuming since this is your MOH, you talk regularly and can be honest with each other. Explain the situation and have her put you down as a "no" for now. And you can check in with her again before th quince to find out if there is space for you.

In my experience with quinces... they are pretty much a free for all, and she will likely have space for you.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

Lol you would think I do but we don't. I'm not as close as I'd like to be. We don't know each other that well. Mostly because I live so far away. But her house is the first place we go when were in town. She's the bestmans wife.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

I just called her a left a message to call me. I received the invite on the 10th on the fb page it says respond by the 15. I sent the RSVP on the 11th.

Blue & White · July 2013

You know you can pick your own maid of honor, right? I would be downright confused if someone who admittedly didnt know me that well asked me to be their maid of honor.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

She's the closest friend I have.

manateehugger · July 2013

You don't have to have bridesmaids or a maid of honor.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

So only a best man and grooms man? Why not have their wives in the wp too? I like them I consider them my sister in laws and the boys are like my brother in laws. We just don't get together more than once a year because we live far from them.

manateehugger · July 2013

GypsyBridetobe said:

So only a best man and grooms man? Why not have their wives in the wp too? I like them I consider them my sister in laws and the boys are like my brother in laws. We just don't get together more than once a year because we live far from them.

Yes, only a best man and a groomsman. I would also find it odd to be asked to be a bridesmaid for a woman I wasn't close to. I would find it even more odd to be asked to be a bridesmaid because my fiance was a groomsman.

QueerFemme · July 2013

if you aren't close with them, that is really weird to have them in the wedding party.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

This is making me feel awful. I need to make friends. Not because of the WP but because i m not close enough to Anyone . I don't even know how to go about fixing this.

[Deleted User] · July 2013

I'm not sure where you live, but I'd look for events or clubs meeting in your area? I have friends, but I spend most days/nights with just FI. I feel you. It's very difficult to make friends once you're out of school. I don't think I've made a new friend on my own since I graduated law school - just some acquaintances I met through FI/friends of FI.

manateehugger · July 2013

Join a club, a volunteer organization, a workout class.

QueerFemme · July 2013

GypsyBridetobe said:

This is making me feel awful. I need to make friends. Not because of the WP but because i m not close enough to Anyone . I don't even know how to go about fixing this.

Another vote for joining clubs, walking groups, book clubs, sewing classes, political groups, etc. Whatever you are interested in. I realize you are in a community of like-minded folks, but even with that, start making an effort to get to know people in your community better. Invite them over for a bbq. Go shopping, go sit and have coffee somewhere. talk to people.

[Deleted User] · July 2013

An exercise class is a super good idea!

manateehugger · July 2013

LMc0322 said:

An exercise class is a super good idea!

I have random "work out friends" from my old kickboxing class. There was a group of us who would go out for drinks or ice cream after class. It's a good way to make acquaintances if nothing else - and it's good for your personal well-being too.

BMoreBride6 · July 2013

Some of my closest friends are people I met from a running group years ago

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

I can't wait to get my savings back up so I can get my butt back in the gym. I'll try zumba.

GypsyWife_ · July 2013

Its so much easier to meet friends on the internet for me.

mlg78 · July 2013

Try meetup.com and see if there are events near you. When I was new to Ohio and out of school I struggled to meet people and a ton of my current friends (including two BMs!) are women I met through Meetups.

AddieCake · July 2013

I am seriously considered joining a couple groups from meetup so I can meet people here.

LakeR2014 · July 2013

@gypsybridetobe join meetup.com and look for an organization you have some interest in. A couple years ago, I joined it and joined a group for 20s-30s something ladies in my area. IT WAS AMAZING!!!! The ladies were great, we did dinners, group outings, and even danced and did happy hours sometimes. The group consisted of singles, married, w/ children, w/o children and was super fantastic. We've become a great group of friends and some will be in my WP, the rest will most definitely be at my wedding. But that's how I found my group of friends - you have to venture out. Good luck!

krizzo17 · July 2013

Meetup is seriously the only reason I have friends where I live now. I'm perfectly comfortable not really having any close friends (I didn't have a wp for this reason), but I do like having acquaintances and events to go to. You'll find after a while, you start setting up plans with certain people outside of the organized meetups, too. I'm definitely a fan.

i already rsvp'd but i cant go.

Re: i already rsvp'd but i cant go.

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