Gratuity

emeejeeayen · August 2013

Is gratuity always given in cash? I'd like to tip my venue, but it will be a few thousand dollars, and I'm not sure I feel comfortable carrying around that much cash in addition to the money I'll tip the DJ, etc. Can I write a check or is that weird?

Thanks!

misssunshine17 · August 2013

I've only ever seen tips in cash. Could you maybe wait until the following Monday or something? I always think its weird to tip before since it's for a job well done.

SMarie89 · August 2013

emeejeeayen said:

Is gratuity always given in cash? I'd like to tip my venue, but it will be a few thousand dollars, and I'm not sure I feel comfortable carrying around that much cash in addition to the money I'll tip the DJ, etc. Can I write a check or is that weird?

Thanks!

I guess I'm confused. I don't think I've ever heard of tipping the venue... Wedding coordinator associated with the venue? Yes. Waiters/bartenders/venue staff? Yes. But the venue itself? If you're planning to tip the venue so that they will tip their staff, it should be in cash so it can easily be divided between the staff members.

Also, I would be sure that they actually will disburse the money appropriately before you actually tip them. If you give the money to the wrong person, it may never end up in the right hands (I've heard some really bad stories from some of my friends in the service industry). If the venue doesn't specifically express their tipping policy in regards to their employees, I would hand the tips out individually (or to the department head) at the actual wedding. For example, give the waiter/waitress/chef tips to the head chef or dining coordinator. Give the valet tips to the head valet. You know what I mean?

But if you are actually thinking about tipping the venue - unless it's like a mom & pop farm that you're renting - or some kind of really small venue where you've personally been working with the owner - I wouldn't tip the venue, itself. That would be odd.

ETA: Clarity

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

You don't need to tip the venue itself. If you had a coordinator who helped manage the event, you can just tip that individual person (I would do this in cash).

From what you're saying about how much money it is, I'm guessing your venue did your food, your cake, etc. Is that right? If so, take a look at your contract and see if gratuity is baked into the cost (I'd bet my username it is). If it's baked in, don't worry about tipping them.

If you had one or two people working for the venue who were particularly helpful, throw them a benji if you want, but it's not necessary.

itzMS · August 2013

We arranged to deliver gratuity (the required kind) and tips after the wedding.

For our limo, we arranged ahead of time to have it delivered it directly to the owner at a separate time (so they could keep it in a safe) of the company versus giving it to the driver the night of.

GlassButton · August 2013

emeejeeayen said:
Is gratuity always given in cash? I'd like to tip my venue, but it will be a few thousand dollars, and I'm not sure I feel comfortable carrying around that much cash in addition to the money I'll tip the DJ, etc. Can I write a check or is that weird?

Thanks!

I think tipping with a cheque may be awkward and make it a bit more difficult to divide the tips.

I agree with @SMarie89. Try and give the tips to the right hands. I always think it's best to give it directly to each person. I've worked as a server at a banquet hall and had my tips pretty much stolen (the head server wouldn't always, give them to me because I didn't need the money, long story).

If you're not comfortable carrying so much money is there anyways you can ask your planner or who ever is helping you help hold some of the tips? I think the best way around it is to only have the tip for the servers, and cooks/ chefs. At the end of the night give each one their tip. You can always contact the manager/ event coordinator later and give them their tip the following week, same as the DJ.

emeejeeayen · August 2013

Sorry - our venue is also the caterers, day-of coordinator, etc. I would give the money to our day-of coordinator directly and ask her to distribute amongst everyone involved since I've only dealt with her and I have no idea how many folks have been involved.

GlassButton · August 2013

emeejeeayen said:
Sorry - our venue is also the caterers, day-of coordinator, etc. I would give the money to our day-of coordinator directly and ask her to distribute amongst everyone involved since I've only dealt with her and I have no idea how many folks have been involved.

That sounds like a plan. On the day of ask a server or ask someone close to you ask a server (if you're too busy) if they actually receive the tips.

LindsayP101 · August 2013

Isn't gratuity part of the contract these days? I know for my venue there is a 15% gratuity already built into what I am paying (and is listed separately so I know that it's the "tip") so I am not planning on giving another gratuity on top of that - just in case - have a look at your contract to see if you are already paying gratuity anyways.

emeejeeayen · August 2013

LindsayP101 said:

Isn't gratuity part of the contract these days? I know for my venue there is a 15% gratuity already built into what I am paying (and is listed separately so I know that it's the "tip") so I am not planning on giving another gratuity on top of that - just in case - have a look at your contract to see if you are already paying gratuity anyways.

We're paying a 20% service fee, but that is not gratuity unfortunately.

misssunshine17 · August 2013

emeejeeayen said:

LindsayP101 said:

Isn't gratuity part of the contract these days? I know for my venue there is a 15% gratuity already built into what I am paying (and is listed separately so I know that it's the "tip") so I am not planning on giving another gratuity on top of that - just in case - have a look at your contract to see if you are already paying gratuity anyways.

We're paying a 20% service fee, but that is not gratuity unfortunately.

Uhg, I hate 'fees.' Like why not build it into the price of the meals/extras, whatever. I wouldn't tip 20% if there is such a large 'service fee.'

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

emeejeeayen said:

LindsayP101 said:

Isn't gratuity part of the contract these days? I know for my venue there is a 15% gratuity already built into what I am paying (and is listed separately so I know that it's the "tip") so I am not planning on giving another gratuity on top of that - just in case - have a look at your contract to see if you are already paying gratuity anyways.

We're paying a 20% service fee, but that is not gratuity unfortunately.

I think a 20% "service fee" IS the gratuity. It's just called a service fee. Otherwise, what's it for?

I would not tip outside of that. Let the venue figure out what to do with the "service fee". If your DOC does an awesome job, give her some cash. Outside of that, I wouldn't worry about it.

emeejeeayen · August 2013

southernbelle0915 said:

emeejeeayen said:

LindsayP101 said:

Isn't gratuity part of the contract these days? I know for my venue there is a 15% gratuity already built into what I am paying (and is listed separately so I know that it's the "tip") so I am not planning on giving another gratuity on top of that - just in case - have a look at your contract to see if you are already paying gratuity anyways.

We're paying a 20% service fee, but that is not gratuity unfortunately.

I think a 20% "service fee" IS the gratuity. It's just called a service fee. Otherwise, what's it for?

I would not tip outside of that. Let the venue figure out what to do with the "service fee". If your DOC does an awesome job, give her some cash. Outside of that, I wouldn't worry about it.

I mean, it's absolutely not gratuity - it's to pay the waitstaff.

MuppetFan · August 2013

That's interesting. If the waitstaff is being paid from the service fee, I don't understand the gratuity.

You tip in situations where service providers are compensated on their service or , when compensated differently, for gratitude of excellent service.

My venue factored gratuity into my per person costs already, so I got lucky there.

But all other places I looked at had cost of food and space, fixed gratuity %, and some had like a 5% service fee.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

emeejeeayen said:

southernbelle0915 said:

emeejeeayen said:

LindsayP101 said:

Isn't gratuity part of the contract these days? I know for my venue there is a 15% gratuity already built into what I am paying (and is listed separately so I know that it's the "tip") so I am not planning on giving another gratuity on top of that - just in case - have a look at your contract to see if you are already paying gratuity anyways.

We're paying a 20% service fee, but that is not gratuity unfortunately.

I think a 20% "service fee" IS the gratuity. It's just called a service fee. Otherwise, what's it for?

I would not tip outside of that. Let the venue figure out what to do with the "service fee". If your DOC does an awesome job, give her some cash. Outside of that, I wouldn't worry about it.

I mean, it's absolutely not gratuity - it's to pay the waitstaff.

I'm really surprised and have never seen that before. That sucks if that's the case. Go with MuppetFan's advice.

CheleLyn · August 2013

Our venue, which is owned by the caterer, figures a 10% gratuity into the final bill. I really wish it was just included in the per plate cost that is discussed so I wouldn't have to refigure everything myself based on the expected headcount.

Edited to correct the percentage

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

@knotporscha @knotjackie - flags

GlassButton · August 2013

@KnotPorscha

Why was I flagged?

misssunshine17 · August 2013

Seriously? My first flag and it's for no reason. Trolls, go away.

delujm0 · August 2013

From what I've been told by my planner, "Service Fee" generally covers the hourly wages of the staff (bartenders, chefs, waitstaff, etc). Is it NOT gratuity, and gratuity is generally still expected. This is why i refused to choose a venue that added a Service Fee. To me, it's just a money grab so they can be like "food starts at $100/person!" when actually it's $120/person due to the fees. Just for fun, I looked at the Ritz as a venue...they added 22% in service fees. Ridiculous.

I got a venue where i bring in an outside caterer...and my catering contract specifically lists out the number of staff that will be present and what their hourly charge is (all are well above minimum wage). I will tip on top of that, probably $25-$50 each for the waiters and kitchen assistants, $100-$150 each for the chef attendants and bartenders, and $200 for the on-site leader from the caterer. The Head Chef is the owner of the catering company, and I've been told that if the person owns the company you don't have to tip them (is that correct? Like my photographer and planner are the sole proprietors of their businesses, so don't expect to tip them).

misssunshine17 · August 2013

Trolls probably just want to create a headache for the KGs.

melbelleup · August 2013

mine price per plate includes service charge/gratuity and PA Sales Tax. Only tipping they tell me to do is the bar tenders, which for two, they recommend $60 a piece.

Jen4948 · August 2013

If you have a service charge for the wait staff, it seems to me that that's the equivalent of a gratuity. The only difference is that "service charge" is two words and "gratuity" is one.

If the service charge is not for the wait staff, I'd find out what it's for. But in any case, I'd write a check that covers the whole amount you want to pay-tip and all.

Gratuity

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