what do the mothers wear?

jordlwilk · August 2013

Like, mother of the bride, mother of the groom? long dresses? short dresses? wedding colors? or?

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

They wear whatever they want. Just explain to them the time of year, the location (indoors/outdoors), what the BMs are wearing, and the general vibe of formality (since they'll probably buy something before you send invitations).

My MIL asked me so many times what she should wear. What color, what fabric, how long/short, sleeveless..... I just told her the answers to the questions above and asked her to wear something she felt good in. She looked great.

KeptInStitches · August 2013

Whatever makes them feel beautiful. They're not in the WP, so it doesn't matter if they wear wedding colors or not. That's at their discretion.

Pepper6 · August 2013

They are not part of the WP, so they can wear whatever they want. I stressed this to both my mom and my MIL, but they both ended up choosing to semi-coordinate with the WP, which was not hard to do since most of our WP was in black.

MyNameIsNot · August 2013

Unless they are bridesmaids, they wear whatever they want. It's the same as all the other guests. Most mothers will want to look fantastic, so they'll choose their best styles and colors.

itzMS · August 2013

jordlwilk said:

Like, mother of the bride, mother of the groom? long dresses? short dresses? wedding colors? or?

This question gets asked here a lot. I always post my wedding as an example, because the outfits couldn't be more different...but all looked great in their own style. It really doesn't matter.

MOB: Grey pencil skirt and fuschia cardi set

MOG: Black and white geometric print form fitting cocktail dress

Step MOG: Floor length navy blue formal halter gown

AddieCake · August 2013

They wear whatever they want.

misssunshine17 · August 2013

They wear whatever makes them feel fabulous.

vk2204 · August 2013

Togas! But only if that is their choice! My mother wore a long purple dress and my MIL wore a short cream dress.

[Deleted User] · August 2013

I took my Mom recently shopping for her MOB dress. She didn't want one of the typical MOB dresses (beads, fish scale fabric patterns, etc.) and grabbed a modest BM dress made of chiffon. We added a 3/4 sleeve bolero of the same material and picked the color. She will look beautiful and she loves her outfit.

decembergrl2014 · August 2013

My mother knows how much I love blue, so she's wearing the floor length royal blue dress she wore when we celebrated my parents 40th anniversary. It's a more modest dress but she's going to bling it out with some nice jewelry. I couldn't be happier!

Tab2384 · August 2013

I do think they should wear what they want within reason. Our wedding is going to be formal, in the fall, and my soon to be MIL wanted to wear a short all sequenced dress in the same color as the BM. I asked her not to wear the same color as my BM and something a bit more formal. That was just my preference.

Jules0287 · August 2013

I think the best thing to tell them is to make sure they look like they belong. They shouldn't be dressed in something that matches the wedding party exactly but they should still mesh with them. If you are having a formal reception, a mother in a short summer dress would stand out like a sore thumb.

My bridesmaids are in long formal gowns that are dark brown and the groomsmen are in dark grey. Both of our mothers are wearing long formal dresses and both are in deep shades of purple. They will look nice in photos and look as formal as the wedding party but won't blend in or stand out to much.

Traditionally, the mother of the bride chooses her gown first and then informs the mother of the groom what she is wearing so that they can coordinate the formality of the gown. You definetly don't want one mother over or under dressed.

Viczaesar · August 2013

Jules0287 said:

I think the best thing to tell them is to make sure they look like they belong. They shouldn't be dressed in something that matches the wedding party exactly but they should still mesh with them. If you are having a formal reception, a mother in a short summer dress would stand out like a sore thumb.

My bridesmaids are in long formal gowns that are dark brown and the groomsmen are in dark grey. Both of our mothers are wearing long formal dresses and both are in deep shades of purple. They will look nice in photos and look as formal as the wedding party but won't blend in or stand out to much.

Traditionally, the mother of the bride chooses her gown first and then informs the mother of the groom what she is wearing so that they can coordinate the formality of the gown. You definetly don't want one mother over or under dressed.

No. You don't get to tell anybody who's not in your wedding party how to dress. If they want to wear something that doesn't "mesh" with the wedding party outfits, that's perfectly fine. Whether they are over or under dressed is their concern, not OP's.

MobKaz · August 2013

@Tab2384 said "I do think they should wear what they want within reason. Our wedding is going to be formal, in the fall, and my soon to be MIL wanted to wear a short all sequenced dress in the same color as the BM. I asked her not to wear the same color as my BM and something a bit more formal. That was just my preference."

I have been both the MOB and the MOG. I HATE wearing dresses. It was downright painful to shop for them. I am grateful that neither my daughter or DIL made ANY comments/restrictions/demands when it came to MY apparel. In particular, I would NEVER wear a long gown....I am short, could never find a long gown "quiet" enough in design....it would be a complete freak show. It should not, and is not, about YOUR preference.

@Jules0287 said, "Traditionally, the mother of the bride chooses her gown first and then informs the mother of the groom what she is wearing so that they can coordinate the formality of the gown. You definetly don't want one mother over or under dressed."

That "tradition" went by the wayside long ago. I can tell you right now that almost any person will be more dressed than I, simply because I lean toward clean, structured, non-embellished dresses. The mothers do NOT have to coordinate among themselves, nor with the bridal party. I was in a handful of photos with the bridal party, and in perhaps 2 with the other set of parents. There is no need or reason to match or coordinate.

There IS a strong argument, however, for the parents to dress to their liking, style, and comfort.

@Jules0287 also said, I think the best thing to tell them is to make sure they look like they belong. They shouldn't be dressed in something that matches the wedding party exactly but they should still mesh with them. If you are having a formal reception, a mother in a short summer dress would stand out like a sore thumb."

I do not need to "look" like I belong. I belong because I am the parent of the bride or groom. The focus will be on the bride, so no one will stick out like a sore thumb. And frankly, it someone wants to make judgments on what I am wearing, it's on them, not me.

what do the mothers wear?

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