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Is it silly or okay...

cncanderson2014cncanderson2014 member
10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I know I have to take everyone's opinion with a grain of salt, but now I'm thinking a lot about what another board member said and I'm wondering if it's silly or okay.
We are having a wedding with 100 invited. I wanted it to be half sit down and half buffet. The first and second course were sit down and the main menu a pasta bar is buffet and the dessert table buffet. Is it silly to split it half and half like that? I didnt' want our guests to stand up for every course, but I also didn't want them piling appetizers and salads, etc on their main plate. Pasta bar to me, means you choose the items you want. Not very easy to do when you are seated. As for dessert, after the cake cutting ceremony, I wanted everyone to feel ready to get dessert when they were ready - not force those to have some that weren't planning on it. We have quite a few friends and family that don't have a sweet tooth.
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Re: Is it silly or okay...

  • KDM323KDM323 member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 500 Comments Name Dropper
    Yeah, it is fine!

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  • NYCBruinNYCBruin member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    Sounds fine to me
    Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
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  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    Not a problem at all.
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  • GypsyWife_GypsyWife_ member
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    I would like it but it sounds like the pasta station would be crowded and a huge line. Can you have more than one attendant or 2 pasta stations?
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  • KatWAGKatWAG member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    It sounds great to me. I would make sure you have enough people wrking the buffett to ensure it moves fast.
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  • StephJean83StephJean83 member
    500 Comments 100 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    A lot of weddings where I live do plated salads with buffets. @GypsyBridetobe, usually what they do is bring the salads out and everyone starts eating. Than the attendants "release" a table or two at a time to the buffet line. That way it isn't a clusterf*ck at the buffet line.
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  • GypsyWife_GypsyWife_ member
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    Oh that's a great idea then. Thanks for explaining @stephjean83
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  • AjulianaAjuliana member
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    At first I thought you meant half your guests will be served and the other half get up to go to the buffet. Honestly, most weddings I've been to had plated salads and cske served, and then buffet dinners. It always worked out fine.
    image

    Previously Alaynajuliana


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  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I have been to a few weddings like this.  The salad is typically plated and served and the main course is buffet.  This is completely fine and usually works out well.

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  • GlassButtonGlassButton member
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    Yup it's fine.
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  • jessicabessicajessicabessica member
    2500 Comments Third Anniversary 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    That's what we did.  There was cold soup at the tables when people sat down, then plated salad, and then tables released to the buffet (we had two identical buffets set up).  We also did a dessert buffet so people could take what they wanted when they were ready for dessert.  I agree with you, OP, that I don't like having to take everything at once off of a buffet.
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  • cncanderson2014cncanderson2014 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Thank you all ladies. That's what I thought, but I guess when one person calls it silly, you begin to freak out. Yes, we are doing one table at a time with three servers and two stations. It's not a ton of people anyway, but having a ton of people standing in line while others are seated with their back close to the buffet table and trying to eat, is no fun.
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  • allispainallispain member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    We did a plated salad that was all set-up and ready when everyone entered the reception so people could start eating if they were hungry. Once we had entered and eaten briefly, they started releasing tables one at a time (we only had 10 tables for 85 guests so it went fast). Totally fine.
    image
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  • harper0813harper0813 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    I see nothing wrong with this. Sounds tasty!
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  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary

    @cncanderson2014

    I think you're referring to me calling it silly.

    The reasoning was that your buffet main courses seemed quite limited (pasta with 3 sauces, correct?). So I thought it would make more sense for guests to be able to grab more of an appetizer or a larger salad if that appealed to them more than pasta. I know quite a few people who don't "do" white carbs/pasta.

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  • lauralee1723lauralee1723 member
    100 Comments Second Anniversary 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    A lot of weddings where I live do plated salads with buffets. @GypsyBridetobe, usually what they do is bring the salads out and everyone starts eating. Than the attendants "release" a table or two at a time to the buffet line. That way it isn't a clusterf*ck at the buffet line.
    I think this sounds like a really good idea, exactly like @StephJean83 said, that way the buffet line won't get super out of hand. But other than that, if I went to a wedding like this, I wouldn't think anything of it!
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  • cncanderson2014cncanderson2014 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Yes, Ms. itzMS, I was referring to your comment. Thank you for clarifying, because you must have miscommunicated what you meant because you wrote:
    "Are the appetizers and salads plated, and then the guests have to get up to go to the pasta bar? That seems a bit silly to me."

    As I mentioned in my other post, I have TONS of allergists, vegans, glucose intolerant and the list goes on and on. I wrote pasta bar and put the three sauces, but will have add ons. For those that can't eat pasta, I am sure I'll find out and for the gluten free side, I'm having gluten free noodles or rice noodles made. I can only please so many. I don't care how much salad they eat, but as I mentioned, I do plan on having a limited amount of appetizers, such as shrimp cocktails shooters and don't want it standing out for everyone to grab; so that some will grab 20 and others get none. I'm not going to overbuy food so that some can hog the food (and I can think of a few that would do so). An appetizer is an appetizer, not a meal. I may even have a salad with chicken breast added as a meal for. I'll have the stuff already, so it's just a matter of incorporating it. Or my future MIL may want to make a dish or two that will satisfy all glucose intolerant. She's already planning on making dessert for them.

    Anyway, thanks for clarifying.
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  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary

    Like I said on your post over on the Food and Cakes board...That seems like A LOT of work.

    And it kind of concerns me that you're worried about people "hogging" food versus just letting them have a good time. Part of a wedding is, sometimes, having too much food so the guests are satisfied.

    I understand budgetary constraints, but having a sort of stingy mindset (like "I am only allotting FOUR SHRIMP PER GUEST OR ELSE") going into it maybe isn't the best approach. Find some different apps (less expensive) or try not to worry about it. 

    *insert peace offering rainbow here*

     

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  • cncanderson2014cncanderson2014 member
    10 Comments 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited August 2013
    but having a sort of stingy mindset (?) - I'm sorry, I don't consider it stingy. People don't' need to gorge themselves; we aren't teenage children here. We talk about etiquette all over this board and rudely grabbing food and not saving for others, in my mind is just rude. However, we have a few in our group that would do that. Sad but true. As you know from my other post: I'm having pre-ceremony food, a four course meal and late night food (I don't consider that stingy). I'm not going to tell them how much shrimp they can or can't take (that would be rude), but we'll have a glass in front of them and if someone else cares to share with them (maybe a dear girlfriend or wife), then kudos to them.

    *insert peace offering rainbow here*
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  • doeydodoeydo member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Another option, for making sure guests get the type and amount of pasta they want, is to have the meal be family style or table side service.
    image
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  • MDbride1012MDbride1012 member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    Sounds good to me.
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