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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Interesting Advice from TK...

Did anyone see this "article" that was posted about the worst advice given to brides how TK's advice on how to handle it?  LINK

Bad Advice: "I was recently a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. I'm also engaged and was amazed when she told me I couldn't wear my engagement ring during her wedding because it was larger than hers…ridiculous!" Scarlet, Longview, TX
Our Advice: Being upstaged by a bridesmaid can be a very real fear for some brides. Handle the situation gently -- explain that you'd rather not take off the ring for personal reasons. If she persists, remove it to avoid more drama.

Why on EARTH would TK recommend removing your own engagement ring to appease a snotty jealous bride?  It's this kind of "advice" that makes bride's think they can treat their bridal party, family, and guests like unpaid labor and play into the whole "it's MY DAY I can do whatever I WANT!"  

On another notes, my FI would really have his feelings hurt if I went to a party without my engagement ring on (not that you could pry it off my finger without me beating you down)...

Re: Interesting Advice from TK...

  • why am I not surprised by TK's advice.

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  • Wow, that advice is embarrassing.

     

  • Did anyone see this "article" that was posted about the worst advice given to brides how TK's advice on how to handle it?  LINK

    Bad Advice: "I was recently a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. I'm also engaged and was amazed when she told me I couldn't wear my engagement ring during her wedding because it was larger than hers…ridiculous!" Scarlet, Longview, TX
    Our Advice: Being upstaged by a bridesmaid can be a very real fear for some brides. Handle the situation gently -- explain that you'd rather not take off the ring for personal reasons. If she persists, remove it to avoid more drama.

    Why on EARTH would TK recommend removing your own engagement ring to appease a snotty jealous bride?  It's this kind of "advice" that makes bride's think they can treat their bridal party, family, and guests like unpaid labor and play into the whole "it's MY DAY I can do whatever I WANT!"  

    On another notes, my FI would really have his feelings hurt if I went to a party without my engagement ring on (not that you could pry it off my finger without me beating you down)...
    Keeping my engagement ring on while I punch TK in the face. It will leave extra big marks. Honestly, insecure brides need to get over it. No one cares about the bridal party. Everyone knows who the bride is, she's wearing the fricking white dress.

    Side note: I was in a wedding wear the bride made all the bridesmaids wear flats because her husband (5'5) is short and she didn't want us too look any taller than him/them, day of the rehearsal we show up and the groomsmen are all 5'8 and up. Annoyed.
  • I hadn't read that before and I wish I could unread it. Oh my god! Who on earth would make that request? Who on earth would acquiesce to it? Even in my "spineless" days there's no WAY I would have followed that - I would have laughed in her face.
  • If it was really going to cause drama on her wedding, I would do it if I was a bridesmaid. I'd roll my eyes about it, but I would do it. 

    I'd probably cut off that friendship after the fact, but I'd do it if she made a stink about it.
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  • huynhette said:
    Did anyone see this "article" that was posted about the worst advice given to brides how TK's advice on how to handle it?  LINK

    Bad Advice: "I was recently a bridesmaid in a friend's wedding. I'm also engaged and was amazed when she told me I couldn't wear my engagement ring during her wedding because it was larger than hers…ridiculous!" Scarlet, Longview, TX
    Our Advice: Being upstaged by a bridesmaid can be a very real fear for some brides. Handle the situation gently -- explain that you'd rather not take off the ring for personal reasons. If she persists, remove it to avoid more drama.

    Why on EARTH would TK recommend removing your own engagement ring to appease a snotty jealous bride?  It's this kind of "advice" that makes bride's think they can treat their bridal party, family, and guests like unpaid labor and play into the whole "it's MY DAY I can do whatever I WANT!"  

    On another notes, my FI would really have his feelings hurt if I went to a party without my engagement ring on (not that you could pry it off my finger without me beating you down)...
    Keeping my engagement ring on while I punch TK in the face. It will leave extra big marks. Honestly, insecure brides need to get over it. No one cares about the bridal party. Everyone knows who the bride is, she's wearing the fricking white dress.

    Side note: I was in a wedding wear the bride made all the bridesmaids wear flats because her husband (5'5) is short and she didn't want us too look any taller than him/them, day of the rehearsal we show up and the groomsmen are all 5'8 and up. Annoyed.
    Well I'm just short of 5'11...guess I would have had to cut my legs off at the knee.  
  • That advice is extremely hurtful. Weddings are events to celebrate love, not to reward jealousy.
    ^ So much this.  I <3 Southern.

    "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."


  • TheKnot can be really hit and miss with its advice.  This was definitely a miss.
  • I hope the bride realizes that even if the BM indulges this horribly rude/mean request, it isn't going to make her own ring bigger.
    Don't worry guys, I have the Wedding Police AND the Whambulance on speed dial!
  • I don't think I'd want to be a bridesmaid for a bride that made that kind of request.

    Officially hitched as of 10/25/13

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  • ElcaBElcaB member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited August 2013
  • I'd be out of the wedding if the bride pushed that. Horrendous advice.
  • If a bride made that request of me, I'd drop out as a bridesmaid.

    I mean, to be fair, it's not difficult for me to not wear a ring. It's not like she's asking me to hide my my leg scars (which I do not do), or cut/dye my hair. A ring is not part of my body, and it's very easy to just leave it at home.

    But the absurdity of the request is the problem. I have some really insecure friends, and I doubt ANY of them would ever ask me to do that. In order to make that kind of request, a bride has to be incredibly self-absorbed, petty, and rude. I don't want to be friends with that kind of person.

    Of course, all this is moot because my engagement ring is quite small ...
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    now with ~* INCREASED SASSINESS *~
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  • So what about family members then who have bigger rings than the bride, do THEY have to take them off. This is the most ridiculous request I have EVER heard of from a bride!
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  • And this is why I have a hard time being upset over some etiquette lapses. At least in my social circles, The Knot has been one of THE go-to resources for over a decade. People read for ideas and advice. Some of it's great. Some of it's... this.
  • So what about family members then who have bigger rings than the bride, do THEY have to take them off. This is the most ridiculous request I have EVER heard of from a bride!
    Funny story. When my cousin got engaged and was showing us her ring at dinner one of my aunts seriously pulled out her ring to compare!
  • I wouldn't want to be a bridesmaid for her, either.

    I don't think that article is interesting, so much as horrendous. I'm tired of sites like this one pumping out terrible advice. I mean, I get that they want to make money and all that... but surely asking someone to remove their engagement ring shouldn't be encouraged.
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  • I wouldn't want to be a bridesmaid for her, either.

    I don't think that article is interesting, so much as horrendous. I'm tired of sites like this one pumping out terrible advice. I mean, I get that they want to make money and all that... but surely asking someone to remove their engagement ring shouldn't be encouraged.
    I meant interesting as in bizarre 
  • Pretty sure EVERYONE in my bridal party had bigger/nicer rings than me. I don't think anyone else seemed to notice. 
    Anniversary
  • I wouldn't want to be a bridesmaid for her, either.

    I don't think that article is interesting, so much as horrendous. I'm tired of sites like this one pumping out terrible advice. I mean, I get that they want to make money and all that... but surely asking someone to remove their engagement ring shouldn't be encouraged.
    I meant interesting as in bizarre 
    Oh I gotcha!



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