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Cousin who expects to be a Bridesmaid

brittierosebrittierose member
First Comment
in Wedding Party
So I have a cousin that I grew up with who seems to be expecting to be a bridesmaid in my wedding because she asked me to be in her's (which she ended up calling off). We were treated at times like sisters when we were younger but she drives me crazy! She is very unpredictable and talks a lot of smack behind your back. She has already said demeaning things about the reception site we have choosen behind my back but in front of my mother.  I don't really want to deal with her drama in my wedding party but I'm afriad of the drama she may cause if I don't put her in my wedding party. Help!?!?
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Re: Cousin who expects to be a Bridesmaid

  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    Any drama she causes is on her. It's probably best if you let it roll off your back.

    She won't change because you ask her to be a bridesmaid, but it sounds like you know that already. Is she one of your nearest and dearest? If so, ask her to be a bridesmaid; if not, don't.

    Sucky situation, though.
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  • KatWAGKatWAG member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    So dont ask her. And dont bring up anything realted to your wedding. If she starts to ask you something about the wedding, bean dip her.
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  • GlassButtonGlassButton member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Name Dropper
    If you're not comfortable asking her to be in your wedding then don't ask her. If she confronts you explain to her that while you love her and care for her that you just didn't feel it was right/ had others to ask/ etc.
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  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    Moderator 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    From what you've said of her behavior, it doesn't sound like you'd be happy having her as a bridesmaid even if she wasn't your cousin. Don't give in. Don't ask her. If she's like this all the time, you probably won't be buddy-buddy forever anyway. Ask the people you're closest to.
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  • amorrison340amorrison340 member
    10 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    I would skip asking her.  Just because she's family doesn't entitle her to being a bridesmaid.  If you decide not to ask her then try not to dwell on it, it will make you crazy and you can't control how she reacts.  It sounds like she would make trouble either way.  
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  • vk2204vk2204 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    Are you having a small WP? If she brings it up you can say that you are only having a few people on each side. Either way, you don't have to ask her. If she wants to create drama and be rude it is on her.
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  • brittierosebrittierose member
    First Comment
    Thank you everyone for all the advise. I am having a small wedding party and my fiance and I have been going rounds about whether or not we should include her. I understand that she is probably going through some things, calling off her own wedding, and all but I don't think I want to deal with her drama.  
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  • melbelleupmelbelleup member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary First Answer
    Ugh I understand this one big time. Just ignore her, especially when she talks about WP. My cousin actually brings it up to my MOH (SIL) and my MOH just walks away or changes topic lol My WP is though my brothers, fiance's brother, his best friend, my SILs, my 2nd cousin who I've known since 8th grade, even went to the same college, and my best friend. The end. I don't have time for drama ;)
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