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Asking for RSVPs before your due date

Kpan123Kpan123
First Comment
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
Would you find this strange/rude because I kind of did. I was invited to a wedding with an RSVP date not for another week. I got asked today by the host for my reponse because they needed to give the headcount in. I was confused because why would you make the RSVP date after you need the headcount? I felt bad but I didnt miss the deadline, so I really shouldnt feel like a RSVP-offender. Would you find this strange?
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Re: Asking for RSVPs before your due date

  • davisse3davisse3 member
    25 Love Its 10 Comments First Answer First Anniversary
    You shouldn't feel bad - they gave you a specific deadline for the RSVP and you haven't missed it. 

    Sure, it would be lovely if everyone RSVP'd immediately, but if they were worried about not getting a headcount in time, they should've made the date earlier. 
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  • misssunshine17misssunshine17 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    It is rude to call before the RSVP date. You're not in the wrong. We tell people wait 2-3 days before calling. 
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  • Kpan123Kpan123
    First Comment
    I thought so. I feel bad thinking this, but maybe they want an early count to B list?
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  • harper0813harper0813 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Anniversary First Answer
    It sounds like they were just itching for an answer. It was rude of them.

    That being said, both sets of our parents did that with their RSVPs because it was down to the 3 days before our RSVP date and 10% of their lists had RSVP'd and they were really annoyed. They just sent out a reminder and most of their guests then came forward and confessed they had lost or thrown away the RSVP card. I didn't know they were asking their guests to RSVP or I would have tried to stop it.

    We're a week past the RSVP date and we still haven't received answers from two dozen guests who already have hotel rooms booked. I'm about ready to feed them vegetarian meals.
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