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private ceremony invitation wording

SJM7538SJM7538 member
250 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
in Wedding Etiquette Forum

I need some help for a friend who is trying to get the wording right for her wedding invitations.

She is getting married in the middle of the week and having a private ceremony. Just her, her fiance and their children. Then the following Saturday they are throwing a big party to celebrate their marriage. Right now her sample says.

"With Thanks and God's Bountiful Blessings

Jane Smith and John Doe will be married in a private ceremony

on X Date."

 

Please join us to celebrate our love and marriage on X date

and X location."

 

I think this will confuse people and make them think they are invited to the ceremony as well. Maybe I'm wrong.

 

 Any thoughts or suggestions would be appreciated?

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Re: private ceremony invitation wording

  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    Moderator 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    SJM7538 said:

    I need some help for a friend who is trying to get the wording right for her wedding invitations.

    She is getting married in the middle of the week and having a private ceremony. Just her, her fiance and their children. Then the following Saturday they are throwing a big party to celebrate their marriage. Right now her sample says.

    "With Thanks and God's Bountiful Blessings

    Jane Smith and John Doe will be married in a private ceremony

    on X Date."

    Please join us to celebrate our love and marriage on X date

    and X location."

    I think this will confuse people and make them think they are invited to the ceremony as well. Maybe I'm wrong.

     Any thoughts or suggestions would be appreciated?

    Yes - that does sound confusing. If I got that as a guest, I would probably call to clarify if we were invited to the ceremony or not. Since they're not already married they can't really use the canned "We got married! Come celebrate!" type language. Here's my best shot...

    "Please join  
    Her
    and
    Him
    to celebrate their marriage 
    with dinner and dancing (or whatever) on
    Date & Time
    Location"

    If I were them, I'd probably also include a link to a website where they can explain their story and plans. Might be less confusing for people.
    *********************************************************************************

    image
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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I like Southernbelle's wording.  At the very bottom of the invitation, I would put "John and Sue will be married in a private ceremony on x date."
    Report Reply
  • emmyg65emmyg65 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    I would just put one date on the invitation—the date of the celebration—to reduce confusion. They can always put their wedding date on their website or mention it later or whatever.
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  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I'd make the main invitation to the reception and use traditional wording with "at the wedding reception of" rather than "at the marriage of" or "as they are united in marriage."

    The date of the wedding can be announced at the reception itself or put on a separate insert.
    Report Reply
  • RebeccaB88RebeccaB88 member
    2500 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    The focus of the invitation should be on the party, because that's what guests are being invited to.  The information about the private ceremony should be downplayed. Like PPs said, either mention it on an insert card, or on a website, or by word of mouth.
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  • misssunshine17misssunshine17 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    edited August 2013
    Please join us in for a party celebrating the marriage of 
    XYZ
    Date & time
    blah blah info

    The couple will be married in a private ceremony on X date.


    Report Reply
  • tammym1001tammym1001 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers

    misssunshine17 said:
    Please join us in for a party celebrating the marriage of 
    XYZ
    Date & time
    blah blah info

    The couple will be married in a private ceremony on X date.


    I don't know if this is correct or not, but if they are worried about people thinking they are invited to the ceremony could they be more ambiguous about it? Just put "the couple will be married in a private ceremony".
    image
    Report Reply
  • Jen4948Jen4948 member
    Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    tammym1001 said:

    misssunshine17 said:
    Please join us in for a party celebrating the marriage of 
    XYZ
    Date & time
    blah blah info

    The couple will be married in a private ceremony on X date.


    I don't know if this is correct or not, but if they are worried about people thinking they are invited to the ceremony could they be more ambiguous about it? Just put "the couple will be married in a private ceremony".
    Limit what's on the main invitation card to just the reception information and make clear that the invitation is to the reception, not the ceremony.  By mentioning anything at all about the ceremony, people could get confused that they're invited to it when they're not-even if the line says "private."  (Some people don't understand or respect "private.")
    Report Reply
  • mumumommumumom
    Second Anniversary First Comment
    I am having a very small wedding ceremony and lovely dinner (24 guests, immediate family) on a Friday night. On Saturday we are having casual a party for 125 friends. The invitations for Saturday night say "please join us to celebrate to marriage of......" The 24 guests invited to both events got a matching insert card about the Friday wedding event with their party invitation. I don't consider the Saturday party to be a "wedding reception" as we will already be married. I will not wear wedding dress on Saturday, have a wedding cake, etc. I don't have any bridesmaids, didnt have a shower. Trying to keep it low-key. We are going to Spain and France the day after the party!
    Report Reply
  • LDubHawksFanLDubHawksFan member
    1000 Comments 100 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    da
    tammym1001 said:



    misssunshine17 said:

    Please join us in for a party celebrating the marriage of 
    XYZ
    Date & time
    blah blah info

    The couple will be married in a private ceremony on X date.



    I don't know if this is correct or not, but if they are worried about people thinking they are invited to the ceremony could they be more ambiguous about it? Just put "the couple will be married in a private ceremony".

    While I don't think having the date of the ceremony is confusing (I understand it is private, it doesn't have a time or location so I wouldn't know where to go) we have seen some crazy interpretations on this site. If you are worried, don't have the date or say "the couple will be married in a private ceremony at an earlier date". This may open it up to being side-eyed since you won't know HOW much earlier.

    On a side tangent, is there a way to use bold, italics and colors for text on a mobile? I didn't want to yell "how", but wasn't sure how to emphasize without the functions above. Thanks!

    image
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