You can't win for trying

Re: You can't win for trying

• itzMS member

  

  August 2013

  Ahhhh. MOG-zilla. Nice.

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• MayDay513 member

  

  August 2013

  HisGirlFriday13 said:

  So, I RSVP'd promptly to my cousin's up-coming wedding for me and FI. (I had to write in "declines with regrets," because the only options were to pick fish or chicken entrees, but that's beside the point).

  
  

  My aunt (cousin's mother/MOG/married to dad's brother) called my father and told him how rude we were to decline so quickly and we couldn't have possibly considered it and, oh btw, the MOB is going to B-list people and us RSVP'ing early allows her to B-list and we are therefore facilitating rudeness.

  
  

  They sent out STDates in January. FI and I knew then that we couldn't attend this wedding. I thought that RSVP'ing promptly would have been appreciated.

  
  

  My brother and SIL, on the other hand, failed to RSVP at all. So then my aunt called my father and told him how rude my brother was for not RSVP'ing and didn't my brother know they needed a head count and what was wrong with him.

  
  

  Meanwhile, my parents are (bafflingly) planning to attend this wedding. I have no idea why, but I look forward to the stories they have from it!

  I love stories from weddings like this. I would attend for the stories or to find another way of being "rude"
  

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  August 2013

  Well, I promise to update you all with whatever stories I learn from my parents. At this point, I kind of wish we could go, but we're already committed to a friend's party that weekend, so we couldn't have gone.

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• hlvonb member

  

  August 2013

  Some people just have this switch in their brain that makes them think they can treat people like crap and that it is ok when a wedding is involved. *Sigh* I too am looking forward to some funny stories though.

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• elizabetheleven member

  

  August 2013

  I feel bad for your dad!! Having to deal with all the phone calls... Geez
  
  I would think sending your decline immediately would be appreciated as well.
  

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• Simply Fated member

  

  August 2013

  I expect updates! Make your parents tell you everything!

  
  

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• Ajuliana member

  

  August 2013

  @alisonmarie658 please fix those links so I can enjoy!
  

  
  

  
  Previously Alaynajuliana

  
  

  
  

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• WonderRed member

  

  August 2013

  Wait, so  it's your fault they have a B-list?!
   
  
  
  
  

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  August 2013

  Apparently, it's our fault that the MOB is going to be able to B-list. Because if we had responded later, she wouldn't have been able to send out the B-list invites.

  
  

  My aunt's logic is that apparently if people RSVP'd on the RSVP date, the MOB wouldn't then send out invites with RSVPs for a date that had passed. I think you can't apply that level of logic to rude people who think B-listing is OK.

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• J9lawrence member

  

  August 2013

  Seriously!?!?  I would appreciate a quick response like that!
  

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  August 2013

  Got it on a Monday, mailed it back on Tuesday. They got it Wednesday, and my father got the phone call Wednesday night.

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• SBmini member

  

  August 2013

  Is it too passive aggressive to send her an etiquette book as an apology? 

  
  

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• MissMolly member

  

  August 2013

  HisGirlFriday13 said:

  So, I RSVP'd promptly to my cousin's up-coming wedding for me and FI. (I had to write in "declines with regrets," because the only options were to pick fish or chicken entrees, but that's beside the point).

  
  

  My aunt (cousin's mother/MOG/married to dad's brother) called my father and told him how rude we were to decline so quickly and we couldn't have possibly considered it and, oh btw, the MOB is going to B-list people and us RSVP'ing early allows her to B-list and we are therefore facilitating rudeness.

  
  

  They sent out STDates in January. FI and I knew then that we couldn't attend this wedding. I thought that RSVP'ing promptly would have been appreciated.

  
  

  My brother and SIL, on the other hand, failed to RSVP at all. So then my aunt called my father and told him how rude my brother was for not RSVP'ing and didn't my brother know they needed a head count and what was wrong with him.

  
  

  Meanwhile, my parents are (bafflingly) planning to attend this wedding. I have no idea why, but I look forward to the stories they have from it!

  Sorry, wouldn't the person getting married be a niece or nephew to one of your parents? In which case, why wouldn't they attend? And, I don't understand why someone would RSVP in the negatory, just because their only choices are fish or chicken, unless you and your FH are allergic to both entrees.
  

  

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• ashleyep member

  

  August 2013

  Aleshad1978 said:

  HisGirlFriday13 said:

  So, I RSVP'd promptly to my cousin's up-coming wedding for me and FI. (I had to write in "declines with regrets," because the only options were to pick fish or chicken entrees, but that's beside the point).

  
  

  My aunt (cousin's mother/MOG/married to dad's brother) called my father and told him how rude we were to decline so quickly and we couldn't have possibly considered it and, oh btw, the MOB is going to B-list people and us RSVP'ing early allows her to B-list and we are therefore facilitating rudeness.

  
  

  They sent out STDates in January. FI and I knew then that we couldn't attend this wedding. I thought that RSVP'ing promptly would have been appreciated.

  
  

  My brother and SIL, on the other hand, failed to RSVP at all. So then my aunt called my father and told him how rude my brother was for not RSVP'ing and didn't my brother know they needed a head count and what was wrong with him.

  
  

  Meanwhile, my parents are (bafflingly) planning to attend this wedding. I have no idea why, but I look forward to the stories they have from it!

  Sorry, wouldn't the person getting married be a niece or nephew to one of your parents? In which case, why wouldn't they attend? And, I don't understand why someone would RSVP in the negatory, just because their only choices are fish or chicken, unless you and your FH are allergic to both entrees.
  

  Yeah I kind of rolled my eyes at that. I'd attend my niece's (or cousin's) wedding, even if she did have poor etiquette.

  
  

  You RSVP so the B&G doesn't save a seat for you. So they don't have to track and call you to find out if you're going or not. The RSVP should have an option for Yes, Attending and No, Not Attending and then an option for food. Or chicken, beef, not attending options.

  

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• MoxieMickie member

  

  August 2013 edited October 2013

     ,l

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• laylasaurus member

  

  August 2013

  She meant that she declined because they simply couldn't attend, and that there was no space allotted for the decline, only spaces for specifying which entree you preferred.  It had nothing to do with the food offerings, she was just commenting that she had to write in "not attending".  Reading comprehension for the win.

  
  

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  August 2013

  @laylasaurus #FTW. I didn't care what the dinner options were, and they weren't why we declined; I was smh at the fact the RSVP card didn't have a line for regrets. I thought that was pretty standard on RSVP cards -- are you coming or not?

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• laylasaurus member

  

  August 2013

  Yeah, it is weird not to leave a line for declines.  A little presumptuous that everyone will definitely be coming.  

  
  

  And it definitely isn't rude to RSVP right away, whether you are attending or not.  Most people appreciate getting them sooner rather than later.  

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• HisGirlFriday13 member

  

  August 2013

  This aunt also un-invited me, my mother, and my SIL from the bridal shower, so the level of rudeness is just staggering, really. We all got invites, and even before we had time to figure out if we could go, she was on the phone to my dad, saying, "They weren't supposed to get invitations. They weren't meant to be invited. I don't want them to come."

  
  

  Welllll, OK, then. That's mostly why I'm amazed my parents are attending the wedding. 

  

  
  

  
  

  I'm gonna go with 'not my circus, not my monkeys.'

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• laylasaurus member

  

  August 2013

  wow, just, wow.  I would avoid this wedding as well.  

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• SBmini member

  

  August 2013

  Let me guess- after the wedding they are going to complain that you didn't send a gift.

  
  

  
  

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