People adding children to RSVP

Chrissyp84 · July 2013

We made the choice to limit children invited to immediate family as our friends and coworkers all have multiple children and we would've blown our budget and venue max quickly. We made sure to clearly address the outer and inner envelopes with the names of those invited but people are RSVPing and adding children. Do we wait and see if more people do this and then make phone calls? I do feel bad because our response cards include a line for children's entrée for 12 and under, but we needed to include it because some out of town family we don't have other contact information on have children around the cut off age to and adult entrée.

Jen4948 · July 2013

I'd call the RSVPers for children immediately and tell them: "I'm sorry for the confusion, but the invitation is only for you and SO. We can't accommodate the children. That's why they weren't listed on the invitation." If they threaten not to come without the children, don't give in, just say, "I'm sorry to hear that-we'll miss you."

HisGirlFriday13 · July 2013

Chrissyp84 said:
We made the choice to limit children invited to immediate family as our friends and coworkers all have multiple children and we would've blown our budget and venue max quickly. We made sure to clearly address the outer and inner envelopes with the names of those invited but people are RSVPing and adding children. Do we wait and see if more people do this and then make phone calls? I do feel bad because our response cards include a line for children's entrée for 12 and under, but we needed to include it because some out of town family we don't have other contact information on have children around the cut of age to and adult entrée.

Ditto PP about calling and explaining this NOW. If you wait, what are you going to do, allow some local people to bring their kids and not the others? If you've drawn a line, you have to stick to that line.

Also, you should never have put a line for 'children's entrees' on the RSVP card. That's the source of confusion for your guests, and rightfully so. You said you feel badly, but you're about to cause a boat load of hurt feelings.

Chrissyp84 · August 2013

Luckily there were only a few people that we had to call and no hurt feelings.

LDubHawksFan · August 2013

Definitely call right away.

I know you can't do anything about this now, but for lurkers, I actually intentionally left our kids meal option off our RSVPs because we were limiting the kids to just immediate family, and wp kids (which covered all OOT), and I then added a handwritten note with their invitations about the kids meal option to those specific parents. We still had one couple without kids invited write in a kids meal "if they are an option", so it's not foolproof.

Chrissyp84 · August 2013

Hindsight.

People adding children to RSVP

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