Inviting kids, not offering a 'kids meal'

lennonkdc · August 2013

My FI and I are having our wedding catered by one of our favorite restaurants, and they're not exactly 'kid friendly'. We're offering a buffet with options that we know our adult guests will enjoy.

The issue is kids. We haven't been able to figure out a good 'cut off' so it looks like we're stuck inviting guests with kids. My worry is that we HAVE to proved a kids meal. I know that the kids on my FI's side who are older (5-8) and will eat whats on the buffet and the infants will be BFing or not be on solid foods yet. My question is what about the handful of 2-4 yr olds, or the 'picky' eaters on my side? Is it 'rude' if we don't provide chicken fingers and fries?

FWIW, the buffet we're planing right now will be a roasted pork loin, grilled chicken breast, a pasta in evoo/gralic with zucchini/ summer squash/ mushrooms, a starch TBD, a veg TBD and a salad.

TheBaysideBride · August 2013

I think grilled chicken and a pasta salad is fine for kids. If they're really picky, M&D probably know to pack a PB&J just incase. Kids palates are not your responsibility!

kefryar · August 2013

I don't think it's rude at all, we aren't even including the younger kids in out guest head count, as I know they won't be eating the food.

I've talked to the parents, and they fully agree that they won't eat the buffet food, and if they do-they will probably just be picking off of their parents plates.

I am, however going to put together snack bags for the little ones, consisting of child friendly snacks, like godfish, fruit, juice boxes, etc.

If the kids want to eat the buffet food, fine, but I don't really think it should be up to you to worry about if people's kids are picky.

WildMagelet · August 2013

Ditto Bayside. The parents I know of small children/picky eaters always come prepared with plenty of snacks JIC. You don't have to have a kids meal, it's just a courtesy.

lennonkdc · August 2013

Gawd u ladis is soooo rude, y u so mean i just wanted advise... HAHAHA Just kidding.

As always, thanks for the advice. I'm not 100% thrilled over having to invite kids (more butts=more chairs/table to rent...) but between that and risking some VIP's not coming, I can suck it up. Thank god most of them are well behaved.

southernbelle0915 · August 2013

I think you're fine. Chicken and pasta are pretty palate neutral. It's not "rude" to not offer a kids' meal. Your options are kid-friendly enough.

Simply Fated · August 2013

I'm biased because as a kid I always enjoyed the adult entrees more. I think the chicken and pasta will be fine. Worst case scenario? One of the parents asks if they can have a plate of chicken with no sauce on it or something.

TheBaysideBride · August 2013

simply fated - that is so funny - i was at a party this weekend and pizza bagels came out and I was psyched! Until i realized they were specially-made for the kids

not enough for hte adults to have.....

kefryar · August 2013

Simply Fated said:

I'm biased because as a kid I always enjoyed the adult entrees more. I think the chicken and pasta will be fine. Worst case scenario? One of the parents asks if they can have a plate of chicken with no sauce on it or something.

I agree with this-my parents were friends with a couple when I was growing up that would serve the adults steak and the kids hotdogs. Obviously, I ate what I was given, but I always wanted the steak.

Simply Fated · August 2013

TheBaysideBride said:

simply fated - that is so funny - i was at a party this weekend and pizza bagels came out and I was psyched! Until i realized they were specially-made for the kids not enough for hte adults to have.....

Pizza bagels are amazing.
I worked at a catering hall where they would set up mini hotdogs and burgers for the kids during cocktail hour. I promise you, the adults ate more of it than the kids did lol.

harper0813 · August 2013

Pizza bagels would make the BEST 10 PM drunk food at a wedding. What was I thinking?!!?

Jen4948 · August 2013

What you have in mind sounds fine.

ErinMQue · September 2013

Not rude at all.

If these children are picky eaters than the parents are probably well aware of it and will plan accordingly by bringing food for their child.

Jen4948 · September 2013

ErinMQue said:

Not rude at all.
If these children are picky eaters than the parents are probably well aware of it and will plan accordingly by bringing food for their child.

Many venues don't allow this. The child will have to be fed outside the wedding reception.

mommapizano · September 2013

We are offering a kids choice (we don't have many kids coming) and all of the kids actually wanted an adult meal, the filet! So we had a mac and cheese and chicken finger option but I guess we didn't need it.

I think chicken is pasta is plenty good for kids anyways.

lfk2013 · September 2013

If you're having a buffet with that many options, I don't think you should be expected to provide an additional kids only meal. Regardless of a kid's age, they will find something to eat.

For ours, since it's a brunch reception, it's fairly standard brunch fair...no separate kids options since they eat everything an adult would eat anyway. If it was plated, then that's a different animal.

LizM61409 · September 2013

There is no requirement that the kids need to eat fried food. What you're offering sounds perfectly reasonable.

phira · September 2013

My older brother is definitely one of the adults who'll try to steal kids' meals at weddings. Well, not steal so much as try to convince kids to give him their chicken nuggets.

Anyway, you're not rude for not providing kids' meals. It's much harder to do that with a buffet than with a plated meal, and your food options sound excellent. As a kid, I was very picky, but I would have eaten a couple of the dishes you mentioned; my parents would have just expected me to be mature and eat SOMETHING. In contrast, I have some super picky cousins whose parents pretty much cater to their pickiness. Because of that, though, my aunt and uncle nearly always bring extra food to family events (peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, yogurt, celery sticks).

If the kids you're inviting are as picky as my cousins, and their parents don't bring extra food for them (some venues prohibit bringing in outside food besides wedding cake, favors, or food from the caterer), remember that your wedding is not an obligation. Parents of such picky kids should know to ask you about the food that'll be served, and if they know their kids will be miserable without a kids' meal, they can leave their children at home. You are providing delicious, edible food that will satisfy your adult guests and most of your younger guests; you are not expected to cater (no pun intended) to each individual guest.

We are going to have a vegan + gluten-free entree option, and one of the meat options will also be gluten-free (I mean, it's not hard to have a meat dish be gluten-free). If my super-duper picky vegetarian + gluten-free friend doesn't like the vegetarian + gluten-free option because she's so darn picky, then what can we do? If my aunt, who's on a new weird diet every month is on a raw food diet at our wedding, then what can we do?

Same goes with child guests. So don't worry about it.

Inviting kids, not offering a 'kids meal'

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