Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Wedding Etiquette Forum
Wedding Etiquette Forum
New Discussion

Shower invite question!!

kissyourselfkissyourself member
First Comment First Anniversary
in Wedding Etiquette Forum

My fiance and I are having a very small private ceremony (15 people) in Niagara Falls,NY (we live in Mich but are going to NY because it's legal there for us) and then having a big reception the week after. My best friend's parents will be invited to the reception portion (they are great!) but since we are limiting the ceremony to closest family and best friends her parents aren't invited to the ceremony. Anyway my best friends mom wants to throw us our wedding shower (which she volunteered to do and is really excited about it) but now I feel obligated to invite them to the ceremony. Would it be ok to still not have them at the ceremony or is that rude? thanks!!

Report Reply to Post

Re: Shower invite question!!

  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    You can't invite anyone to the bridal shower that isn't invited to the ceremony. Given your circumstances, I would thank your friend's mom but decline the offer of a shower.
    Report Reply
  • Maggie0829Maggie0829 member
    Eighth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its 25 Answers
    I agree with KeptInStitches.  When you choose to have a very small destination wedding a lot of times you have to forgo the pre-wedding parties like showers and bach parties.  Even though it was a generous offer I would politely decline.

    Report Reply
  • misssunshine17misssunshine17 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    Only people who are invited to the actual ceremony should be invited to any pre-wedding parties including showers and bachelorette. 

    Do you think the mom thinks she's invited? I would probably make the room since she's doing such a nice thing for you. 
    Report Reply
  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary

    Agreed. Skip the wedding shower.

    I acknowledge that your situation is a bit different than the "norm", but having a wedding shower without inviting guests to the ceremony still wouldn't pass muster. Sorry!

     

    Report Reply
  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    kissyourself said:

    My fiance and I are having a very small private ceremony (15 people) in Niagara Falls,NY (we live in Mich but are going to NY because it's legal there for us) and then having a big reception the week after. My best friend's parents will be invited to the reception portion (they are great!) but since we are limiting the ceremony to closest family and best friends her parents aren't invited to the ceremony. Anyway my best friends mom wants to throw us our wedding shower (which she volunteered to do and is really excited about it) but now I feel obligated to invite them to the ceremony. Would it be ok to still not have them at the ceremony or is that rude? thanks!!

    Ditto PP.  You should decline the offer of the shower. 
    Report Reply
  • kissyourselfkissyourself member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    To be honest we don't want a shower! The wedding gifts are enough to us and people being there are enough to us. I think i will just tell her we aren't going to be having a shower at all but thank you for the offer. The input helps a lot though! Usually when I dont feel right about something it's because it's not haha.
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards