My fiancé has had a very rocky past with his family. He went for many years, including the four that we have been together, without speaking to his mother. He does have a relationship with his father and step-mother. All of a sudden, he has felt this longing to have his mother involved in our wedding planning. I have been fully supportive and told him to do what he is comfortable with, and that I would back him up. His mother, however, seems to create a fight and berate him every chance she gets. When he called her to say that we should have dinner and discuss her involvement, she tried to yell about how he was punishing her for things she never did (including a very recent drug charge). I have tried to gently ask him if he really wants his mother there (when he never has before) or if he is enamored with the IDEA of his mother being involved. He is never able to give an answer.
Personally, his mother has been very, very awful to him. She is abusive, an alcoholic... you name it. It deeply hurts me every time I see how she makes him feel about himself. He's worked so hard to get over her mental abuse. I honestly don't want her involved because she loves fights and goes out of her way to ruin things my fiancé loves. But, I want to support him. I just know that if we invite her, she will come, and she will make it her purpose in life to ruin the event. She's even stated as such.
We are making a guest list, and I don't know the best way to handle this... HELP!