• Images
  • Text
  • Find a Couple + Registry
GO
Etiquette

Specific Etiquette for Best Man's Date?

I've been dating my bf for a couple months and am going with him to his best friend's wedding, of which he is the best man. I'm wondering if there's anything that is expected of me or any specific etiquette I need to abide by, since he will be seated with the wedding party and I will be seated elsewhere.

Re: Specific Etiquette for Best Man's Date?

  • ohmrs2014ohmrs2014 Dirty Jerz mod
    Moderator 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary
    Well I for one think its rude that they are having the bridal party sit separately from their dates.  That is a big etiquette no-no and your BF should speak up about that.
    Anniversary



    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    doeydoKeptInStitchesBlue_Bird
  • Nope. It's rude of them to split you up, but all you need to do is be your typical polite party guest.
    Blue_Bird
  • doeydodoeydo Southwestern Ontario member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    During the reception, people in the wedding party should be seated with their significant others, whether that means having them all at the head table or at their own table(s) while the bride and groom are at a sweetheart table.  Whatever gifts/cards your bf gets for the couple should be from both of you.  I don't think anything is really expected of you; just have a nice time and mingle.
    image
  • Is your bf's family invited/attending the wedding?

    I was in a similar situation where bf was the bm and had to sit at a head table. (I didn't think it was rude, I guess I thought it was more or less expected of him as a bm). I sat with his family, stayed close to his sister, and tried to blend in until the point in the night where he was relieved of his duties.

    The biggest etiquette advice I have is not to be too much in your bf's face while he's busy with his duties as a bm. If you show you can be supportive from afar and let him enjoy this time with his best friend then he will take notice. Plus there will be time for you two to dance and enjoy each other after the festivities die down.
    jendemeyer
  • Is your bf's family invited/attending the wedding? I was in a similar situation where bf was the bm and had to sit at a head table. (I didn't think it was rude, I guess I thought it was more or less expected of him as a bm). I sat with his family, stayed close to his sister, and tried to blend in until the point in the night where he was relieved of his duties. The biggest etiquette advice I have is not to be too much in your bf's face while he's busy with his duties as a bm. If you show you can be supportive from afar and let him enjoy this time with his best friend then he will take notice. Plus there will be time for you two to dance and enjoy each other after the festivities die down.
    ehhh I disagree. His "duties" (and I use that term loosely) end after the ceremony is over and he takes a couple pictures. He shouldn't be seated apart from you at the reception and you shouldn't have to be hidden away. You both are there to enjoy the festivities, why go to the wedding at all as his date if you have to wait until after the festivities are over before you can even be with him?

    After 6 years and 2 boys, finally tying the knot on October 27th, 2013!

    Maggie0829
  • I've been dating my bf for a couple months and am going with him to his best friend's wedding, of which he is the best man. I'm wondering if there's anything that is expected of me or any specific etiquette I need to abide by, since he will be seated with the wedding party and I will be seated elsewhere.
    DON'T SCREW THIS UP!!! Just kidding! :) Nothing is expected for your role other than just be polite like you normally would as a wedding guest. Have fun!

    It's really rude of the B&G and to seat you apart from your SO - I'm sorry this is happening to you. Obviously don't gossip about it (it's against etiquette to call people out on their etiquette blunders), but you can rant here all you want. :)
    *********************************************************************************

    image
  • If you don't know these people at all, I'd do a little investigating into how people will be dressed...particularly if it may be a very conservative crowd...and be sure you'll blend in. Obviously avoid white, but I'd also avoid red and black, and make sure my shoulders could be covered if necessary, and it wasn't too sexy. 

    In addition to being just a generally polite party guest, I'd say your duties are to also look like you are having a grand old time, even if you're stuck talking to a racist uncle or crazy friend.
    melbelleupjendemeyer
  • I just went to a wedding because my fiancé was in the wedding party. I only knew the bride and groom.... It sucked. He had to sit with them through dinner I sat. Alone until old people felt bad and at with me (no assigned seating) I literally wanted to cry. I was worried about what to wear if I was over dressed or under (f was less than helpful) I hope you have a better experience than me I'm a shy person so I don't step out and talk to people unless I knew them
  • Of course, while it is rude to separate attendants from their dates, you also need to just kinda deal with it if they make the poor etiquette choice.  As folks often note, the ladies here will let someone know if a choice is poor etiquette, their guests usually won't since it isn't polite (well, sometimes it can be done politely in advance, but I don't see how this issue can be addressed in the moment) and two impolite choices don't make a proper one!  Not that I think anyone was saying they would advocate complaining, just thought it should be added in to be thorough.

    If you think you are getting a table full of strangers, I might look around for some general news topics...more like entertainment news than politics since you want to have some conversation starters, not debate starters! 

    Wedding Countdown Ticker
    melbelleup
  • Not etiquette advice, but if he's giving a toast at the reception it would be nice to offer yourself as a sounding board for it. Some people do them on the fly, but I like to practice what I'm saying before speaking in front of people.
    melbelleupjendemeyer
  • It's so rude when the bridal party has to sit together and their dates and friends are elsewhere!

    Your only requirement is to have fun at the wedding! :)

  • photokittyphotokitty where I want to be mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its
    eileenrob said:

    It's so rude when the bridal party has to sit together and their dates and friends are elsewhere!

    Your only requirement is to have fun at the wedding! :)

    True, but if this happens do not tell the bride of her faux pas ;-) If it happens smile and be gracious - since you're asking for advice - but I'm sure you could have figured that one on your own! :-D
    :kiss: ~xoxo~ :kiss:

  • I've been dating my bf for a couple months and am going with him to his best friend's wedding, of which he is the best man. I'm wondering if there's anything that is expected of me or any specific etiquette I need to abide by, since he will be seated with the wedding party and I will be seated elsewhere.

    I don't know why people insist on breaking apart coupls for seating at a head table.  I never even considered this as an option, and I planned since day one to seat our wedding party with their dates and friends at whatever table they would be comfortable at!

    To answer your main question, it sucks to be separated from your bf, so lets hope if there is asigned seating you know someone at your table.  As a guest your only "requirements" are to show up on time and not be disruptive.  I doubt you will have any problems with that.  If you want to blend in you could talk to your bf and his family and see what they are all wearing, and don't worry, you and bf should have plenty of time to dance and party together!

    Have fun!

This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards