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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Wedding Desserts

Spurred by ClimbingBrideNY's post on wedding cakes; I wonder if guests expect to have other desserts available at weddings in addition to a wedding cake?  I hadn't planned on having dessert options in addition to wedding cake, but man those sure sounded good.  Maybe I need to consider those options.  I'm not sure if this is exactly an 'etiquette-board' question, but what is expected in terms of desserts at a wedding, typically?  To open it up more and maybe make it applicable as a general etiquette question - at an evening wedding serving dinner, what extent of food courses and options would be expected to host appropriately?
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Re: Wedding Desserts

  • Coeur said:
    Spurred by ClimbingBrideNY's post on wedding cakes; I wonder if guests expect to have other desserts available at weddings in addition to a wedding cake?  I hadn't planned on having dessert options in addition to wedding cake, but man those sure sounded good.  Maybe I need to consider those options.  I'm not sure if this is exactly an 'etiquette-board' question, but what is expected in terms of desserts at a wedding, typically?  To open it up more and maybe make it applicable as a general etiquette question - at an evening wedding serving dinner, what extent of food courses and options would be expected to host appropriately?


    Cake OR Dessert is fine.

    Some couples prefer to do a ton of desserts because...they like dessert. ;-)

  • Sounds about right.  Sigh, I am totally in over-analyzing mode, haha, with so little time to go.
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  • Well I don't know what is considered proper but I will tell you what I have seen and everyone seemed fine with it.  Most weddings I have been to consisted of a starter or salad, main course and wedding cake and everyone seemed satisfied at that. I think that would be the typical dinner setup. 

    I've been to some weddings with several courses with starter, salad, soup and a main plus cake and desserts. But I don't think anyone expects that many courses. 

    As long as you have some food and drinks at cocktail hour and what a full entree and either cake or some sort of dessert at dinner, I think you a meeting your requirements as a host.
  • I've only been to two weddings that had cake PLUS more dessert. One had the full venetian hour which was incredible, and no one ate the wedding cake. The other one had an ice cream sundae bar which was a fun idea, but it was really messy and the ice cream was terrible.

    I've never heard anyone complain that they 'only' had cake. We just had cupcakes. 
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  • I'm serving a choice of sticky toffee pudding or a local cheeseboard for dessert, and then cake and/or cupcakes after that.

    Then for the late night snack, rice crispie treats.
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  • Coeur said:
    Spurred by ClimbingBrideNY's post on wedding cakes; I wonder if guests expect to have other desserts available at weddings in addition to a wedding cake?  I hadn't planned on having dessert options in addition to wedding cake, but man those sure sounded good.  Maybe I need to consider those options.  I'm not sure if this is exactly an 'etiquette-board' question, but what is expected in terms of desserts at a wedding, typically?  To open it up more and maybe make it applicable as a general etiquette question - at an evening wedding serving dinner, what extent of food courses and options would be expected to host appropriately?
    I wouldn't expect it as a guest.  That said, our caterer includes a selection of desserts and I still plan to have a cake.

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  • It is perfectly acceptable to have the cake as dessert.
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  • Do they expect it? No

     

    Is is fun and exciting to have a dessert bar? absolutely..but certainly not a requirement at all

  • We are having a cupcake tower with 4 different types of cupcakes, a candy bar with about 10 different types of candies, and at the venue bridal show, we won a chocolate fountain for our event The chocolate fountain comes with strawberries, marshmallows, vanilla wafers. I think I might bring some pretzels and/or pineapple to go with the fountain. 
  • We're doing a cake and at least one other kibd of dessert. The cake is very much my FI's thing, and what he wants needs to be all one flavor/filling. Since I'm not really a cake fan anyway, we're going to have a choice. Just not sure whether it'll be creme brulee or gelato.
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  • Just out of curiosity, is it bad etiquette to not serve dessert or cake?

    Live fast, die young. Bad Girls do it well. Suki Zuki.

  • I don't know that it's bad etiquette, but I know I would miss dessert. I'd never say anything, of course, but I would be kind of looking for it.
  • I expect some sort of food to be avalible when or shortly after I arrive at the reception, read if there is a cocktail hour, that there is food, if there isn't then either dinner is served shortly after the reception starts or there is something to nibble on in the mean time.  I expect some sort of full dinner.  For me that means generally some sort of meat, a starch and a veggie, but if it resembles something that might be in the "dinner" section of a restaurant, I'm good.  Lastly I expect some sort of dessert, cake is good, but anything sweet works.
  • I love the dessert portion of a wedding...I don't know it is necessarily wrong to not have dessert, but I would miss it for sure!  Also just a cake would meet this requirement but since both my fiancee and I (and our families) love dessert so much we are opting to add on some extras beside the cake!
  • AlexisA01 said:
    Just out of curiosity, is it bad etiquette to not serve dessert or cake?
    Probably not, but probably also a lot of people would be disappointed if there wasn't some kind of dessert.
  • It's not expected. It's just a nice extra option. I've been to weddings that had tons of desserts, and I just thought it was too much. I think couples visit wedding sites and watch wedding shows, and think they have to match or top them or they're being rude. Really, no one is disappointed with just a nice meal, good music, and somewhere comfortable to sit.
  • I expect dessert. I wouldn't be terribly upset if there wasn't, but I would pout to myself then eat a cookie when I got home. Major sweet tooth here, though.
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