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fight for Maid of Honor

Tchavon1984Tchavon1984 member
100 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
in Wedding Party
not even 10 minutes after getting engaged my sister and cousin were fighting over who would be maid of honor. I decided long before to make my best friend MOH but now I dont know why I feel bad... I'm close with all 3 so I honestly know someones feelings would be hurt... would it be normal if I didnt have a MOH or should I just choose one and the others just have to get over it? 
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Re: fight for Maid of Honor

  • allispainallispain member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    You are the bride. Therefore, you get to choose your MOH. Your sister and your cousin do not get to decide for you.

    Both options you mention are perfectly acceptable - you can choose the person you would like to pick (and potentially have to deal with hurt feelings, which they will just have to get over) or you can choose to not have a MOH (essentially going against what you want in hopes of not hurting their feelings as much). Keep in mind, they will both probably be hurt regardless, since they will want you to pick them.
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  • ViczaesarViczaesar member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    It's fine not to have a MOH, it's also fine to have more than one.  However, you shouldn't decide your wedding party (or at least tell them) until you're less than a year from the ceremony.  I suggest you tell them both that you're not even thinking about your wedding party yet and that you just want to enjoy being engaged right now. 



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  • mlg78mlg78 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    Your sister and cousin sound immature.  Quite honestly, I'd stick with your original plan of having your best friend be your MOH and have those two be bridesmaids.  I just foresee one becoming MOH and the other being all pissy pants about it and causing you more stress than it's worth.  Lastly, as it's been mentioned, wait to tell them until it's the appropriate time that you'd like them to be in the wedding party.
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  • Tchavon1984Tchavon1984 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    you ladies are right I have other things to focus on right now... the problem is they dont understand all that comes with MOH they just want the title the only one I can really depend on is my BF... but I'll focus on that later... Thanx Ladies 
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  • doeydodoeydo member
    Seventh Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Tchavon1984 said:
    you ladies are right I have other things to focus on right now... the problem is they dont understand all that comes with MOH they just want the title the only one I can really depend on is my BF... but I'll focus on that later... Thanx Ladies 
    You don't think it means that one has to plan parties and help you with planning and DIYs, right?  Just checking.
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  • Tchavon1984Tchavon1984 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    no not at all, I expect them all to help just the same but I feel the MOH would be the one you can rely on when you are freaking out about something or to maybe get the other girls together to help with something if I couldnt do it myself... it's beyond a title to me and I just dont see my cousin or my sister being there like that. but then again I've never been married so I dont know
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  • mlg78mlg78 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers

    A wedding party member's only role is to buy the dress and show up sober at the wedding to walk down the aisle.  Nothing more.  If they happen to offer to throw a party or help with decorations or whatever, that's great...but not required.  And you'd hope that any friend would lend an ear if you're flipping out because that's just what friends do.

    I still stand by what I said -- select your best friend.  The other two girls seem very immature.

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  • WildMageletWildMagelet member
    Knottie Warrior 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Combo Breaker
    Are you still getting married next December?  I would shelf this entirely and not think about it until March or April of next year.

    Pick who you want to pick because they're close to you, not because you'll think they'll do more work for your wedding. 

    Alternatively, obstacle courses, fear-factor styled eating challenges, laser tag, or mud wrestling all sound like fairly entertaining competitions. :)
    Formerly known as flutterbride2b
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  • wishin4ringwishin4ring member
    Fifth Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Love Its
    Your MOH is whoever YOU want it to be. Sounds to me like you've already thought about it and you know who would be best for the position. I would wait to ask anyone to join your bridal party until you and your FI start planning your wedding.
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  • Tchavon1984Tchavon1984 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    we've already started planning. I didnt keep my bridal party a secret bcuz I'm keeping it simple it's only the ppl close to me... my sisters, cousin and best friend but yeah I know who I'm going to choose I let the family card start to sway my choice but there is no question my BF def deserves the title
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