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Just a quick whine:/

Sembree1Sembree1 member
10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
in Wedding Party
I have 5 people in my bridal party, and none have offered to help with any sort of planning:/ I know it is not their job and I don't expect them to take time out of thins the need/want to be doing, but I was hoping to spend time with them and everyone help me get stuff ready. (Huge DIY wedding). I'm not going to ask them or drop hints or anything, just keep wishing they'd help:/ But the most important part is they will be standing up there with me to celebrate an extremely special day and I am extremely grateful they have all made arrangements to be free for that when I'm sure at least one of them is going to have to reschedule or  give up something to be there.  Thanks for letting me whine:)
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Re: Just a quick whine:/

  • mlg78mlg78 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    I hate doing crafty stuff so I certainly wouldn't be stepping up and offering even if I were a good friend in your wedding...  My girls didn't help me with anything other than going dress shopping with me.  Nobody is more excited about your wedding than you are.  It sucks others may not share that excitement...but it is what it is...
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  • vk2204vk2204 member
    1000 Comments Third Anniversary 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    I didn't ask anyone for help, but when they would ask how I was doing with planning I would let them know I had to do xyz and some would offer at that point when they knew exactly what it was that I needed help with. I put out a broad "if you need help let me know" message to a bride before and oh boy did that get me in trouble lol. I am far from crafty and I got in way too deep!
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  • OliveOilsMomOliveOilsMom member
    Tenth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Sembree1 said:
    I have 5 people in my bridal party, and none have offered to help with any sort of planning:/ I know it is not their job and I don't expect them to take time out of thins the need/want to be doing, but I was hoping to spend time with them and everyone help me get stuff ready. (Huge DIY wedding). I'm not going to ask them or drop hints or anything, just keep wishing they'd help:/ But the most important part is they will be standing up there with me to celebrate an extremely special day and I am extremely grateful they have all made arrangements to be free for that when I'm sure at least one of them is going to have to reschedule or  give up something to be there.  Thanks for letting me whine:)
    I'm sorry your not getting the help you want from your BMs.   But you are doing it the right way!  Don't ask for help, let them offer it.  Also, is your FI helping?  I know my H helped with all my little DIY projects, including assembly invites, making the favors, helping with programs and place cards!  Ask your FI for help if you are feeling overwhelmed!
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  • itzMSitzMS member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers First Anniversary
    My eyes honestly glaze over when brides of weddings that I'm in start talking about their DIY projects.

    I work all week. The last thing I want to do after work or on the weekend is stuff that she and her FI should do themselves (or shouldn't have decided on the DIY project if they couldn't handle it).
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  • SJM7538SJM7538 member
    250 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    itzMS said:
    My eyes honestly glaze over when brides of weddings that I'm in start talking about their DIY projects. I work all week. The last thing I want to do after work or on the weekend is stuff that she and her FI should do themselves (or shouldn't have decided on the DIY project if they couldn't handle it).
     
    Stuck in the box!
     
    Ditto to all of this. I hate crafting and DIY stuff makes me crazy.... keeping it organized and buying everything. I would rather pay someone else to do it. If it wasn't for my mom I wouldn't have any center pieces or favors. My only decorations would be my flowers. I am grateful for everything that she did but I never ever would have done it myself.
     
    I've told all my friends that I will gladly help them if they need any DIY help for their weddings but don't expect it anytime Monday through Friday.

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  • Sembree1Sembree1 member
    10 Comments Name Dropper 5 Love Its
    I would never ask them to help. Only if they offer:) I love the DIY aspect, as do 2 of my bridesmaids. My sister who is my MOH had a very DIY wedding last year and we made everything but her wedding dress:)
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  • KeptInStitchesKeptInStitches member
    5000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 5 Answers
    I love DIY and crafting, but I got burned in the past by a bride. It makes me a lot less likely to offer anything now. Some of that could be coming into play, too.
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  • smalfrie19smalfrie19 member
    Ninth Anniversary 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Combo Breaker
    I have a FI to help me with DIY. I am not a craft oriented person, so when things get frustrating for me..he steps in and helps..
    Anniversary
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  • Majelin86Majelin86 member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    Even though my bridesmaids offered to help I didn't have them help me at all, I think I would've felt selfish taking up their time to do things for my wedding. I did the DIY stuff myself, and only had my bridesmaids come dress shopping with me :)
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  • Dreamergirl8812Dreamergirl8812 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary First Answer
    I haven't gotten any "help" from my BMs and I haven't "helped" my BM who's getting married next month. That's what fiances are for!



    Anniversary
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  • Blue_BirdBlue_Bird member
    Sixth Anniversary 500 Love Its 500 Comments First Answer
    Sembree1 said:
    I have 5 people in my bridal party, and none have offered to help with any sort of planning:/ I know it is not their job and I don't expect them to take time out of thins the need/want to be doing, but I was hoping to spend time with them and everyone help me get stuff ready. (Huge DIY wedding). I'm not going to ask them or drop hints or anything, just keep wishing they'd help:/ But the most important part is they will be standing up there with me to celebrate an extremely special day and I am extremely grateful they have all made arrangements to be free for that when I'm sure at least one of them is going to have to reschedule or  give up something to be there.  Thanks for letting me whine:)
    I'm sorry you feel like you're in this alone. It looks like you took on much more than you could handle. I have a habit of doing this and end up staying up late the night before events to add extra details that no one notices but me. I knew I'd do this for my own wedding, so I tried to pare down the D.I.Y. projects to really simple necessary items. Probably a lot of these projects could be eliminated or made simpler (and probably more cost-efficient) if you just shopped around.
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  • ei34ei34 member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers

    I did my DIY stuff with my fiancé, not my bridesmaids. Is your FI able to help at all?  Because you're right to whine, it stinks to have a lot on your plate and have to do it alone!

    As a bridesmaid, I've always helped my brides a lot.  Brides I was close to, like my sister, I loved every minute of it.  Brides that I wasn't too close to/I wish I'd declined being in their WP, it felt more like a chore. 

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