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Does it matter?

hlvonbhlvonb member
500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
in Wedding Etiquette Forum
I have a question. I hope it's not confusing....

I have been told that traditionally bridal party members do not get save the dates / invites. How do I go about doing the invites for "split" families? Example: Tony is married. Tony is a groomsman. Do I send the save the date and invitation to his wife only or to both of them anyway? Another example: Alexandria and her husband live with her mother. Would the save the date and invite be for the husband and mother only? Does it matter if I include the bridal party members on the save the dates and invites or not?
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Re: Does it matter?

  • hlvonbhlvonb member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary 5 Answers
    @Viczaesar

    Thanks!
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  • Ven&RadioVen&Radio member
    1000 Comments 250 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    Only children under 18 should be included on a parents invitation. Adult children living with parents should get a separate invite for themselves + SO
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  • southernbelle0915southernbelle0915 mod
    Moderator 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary
    hlvonb said:
    I have a question. I hope it's not confusing....

    I have been told that traditionally bridal party members do not get save the dates / invites. How do I go about doing the invites for "split" families? Example: Tony is married. Tony is a groomsman. Do I send the save the date and invitation to his wife only or to both of them anyway? Tony and his wife get invited on the same invitation, just like any other married couple (e.g. Mr. and Mrs. Smith). Another example: Alexandria and her husband live with her mother. Would the save the date and invite be for the husband and mother only? Alexandria and her husband will get an invitation and Alexandria's mom will get a separate invitation addressed only to her. Yes - they are going to same address but since they are adults part of two separate social units (they just happen to be co-habiting), they get invited separately. Does it matter if I include the bridal party members on the save the dates and invites or not?
    Wedding party members are honorary guests - they're still guests. They get an STD/invitation just like any other guest. 

    Does that answer your question?
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  • InkdancerInkdancer member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    Wedding party members need the information on invites and STDs just as much as anyone else. Don't leave them out.
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    eyeroll
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  • mysticlmysticl member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary First Answer
    Whoever told you that is clueless.  Imagine you sent an invitation addressed to only Tony's wife.  That means Tony is not invited.  So now they might think there is a problem with Tony and you didn't have the decency to address it.  
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  • CLI242009CLI242009 member
    250 Love Its 500 Comments First Answer Name Dropper
    edited October 2013
    My FMIL also told me this when I was getting my StDs & Invite count. I don't understand why they wouldn't get one. I don't even know where this notion came from? Does anyone know? 

    Not on here but I have read in bridal magazines and on other forums bridal horror stories, where bridal party members completely forget the date and planned for something else. Especially in the summer time. 

    Sorry I just wanted to comment, I am still learning about etiquette so I'll let the more experienced gals answer ^_^ 
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