Wedding Woes

Four men in the world

Dear Prudie,
I have been seeing a really sweet guy for three months. He is intelligent, fun, considerate, and generous. My issue is that he is a virgin and doesn't seem very interested in changing that. We are both in our early 30s. I am recently divorced—my husband was a compulsive cheat—and have a 2-year-old son. I have discussed sex with “James” and he said that he originally wanted to wait until marriage for religious reasons, but now doesn't feel that is necessary, he just wants it to be with the right person. We were making out the other night and I whispered to him how much I wanted him. He said he wanted me, too, but he sounded awkward and unconvincing. He always tells me that we can't do anything because he doesn't have condoms, but he hasn't made any attempts to purchase some. I can tell he is aroused when we kiss, but I’m worried that he just isn't very interested in sex. That would be tough for me to handle long term. Is it wrong that I expect our relationship to be further along after three months? My friends say I need a man with more heat and passion but I am hesitant to pass up an otherwise great guy.

—Thirty-Year-Old Virgin

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