The same thank you cards?

Onceinalovetime · October 2013

Is it rude to send out generalized thank you cards with the same message in each, instead of personalizing each one?

It was a very sweet message on the inside, I'm just wondering if this is socially acceptable. We are also going to include a professional picture of us.

KeptInStitches · October 2013

You should personalize each one. After all, they took time to personalize a gift for you - even if they bought it off the registry, they bought it because they thought/knew you'd like it. It's only right to take 2-3 minutes to acknowledge that.

Onceinalovetime · October 2013

Thank you for the reply

Also, we had a couple of guests that left the reception very early on. These guests also didn't give a gift and left nothing in their cards. We are perfectly not bothered by it, we are just wondering what we would say in the thank you card? Would you even send one?

KeptInStitches · October 2013

I would only send thank-you cards to people who gave you gifts and/or cash. Otherwise it can come across as passive-aggressive.

itzMS · October 2013

KeptInStitches said:
I would only send thank-you cards to people who gave you gifts and/or cash. Otherwise it can come across as passive-aggressive.

This. Gift=thank you note. Personalized and handwritten

The reception was the "thank you" for coming.

HisGirlFriday13 · October 2013

Onceinalovetime said:

Is it rude to send out generalized thank you cards with the same message in each, instead of personalizing each one?

It was a very sweet message on the inside, I'm just wondering if this is socially acceptable. We are also going to include a professional picture of us.

Unless you told your photographer you needed one of the pro pics early -- as in, within two weeks after the wedding -- please don't do this. People care far more about timely notes than notes that include a professional photo of you two. If you have to wait more than 2-3 weeks to get the pro pics, skip them, and include them in your Christmas cards.

mimiphin · October 2013

Onceinalovetime said:

Is it rude to send out generalized thank you cards with the same message in each, instead of personalizing each one?

It was a very sweet message on the inside, I'm just wondering if this is socially acceptable. We are also going to include a professional picture of us.

My Little sis (Sorority) did something like this. It was a postcard type thing and was a beautiful general thank you card that had a picture of her and her new hubby which is now displayed on my fridge. BUT she also included a hand written card as well thanking me for the glasses I got her. So to be technical she sent 2 thank you notes in the same envelope.

The Handwritten one means the most to me but I like having her wedding picture on my fridge.

HisGirlFriday13 · October 2013

alisonmarie658 said:

Unpersonalized thank you cards are beyond lazy. Don't be that couple.

Also this. They took the time to give you a gift, you take the time to hand-write a real thank-you note.

Majelin86 · October 2013

Our photo card has a general "thank you for being part of our special day" on the front and then we are handwriting a personal message to each guest/couple on the back. I think it means more when it's personalized to each person. Though time-consuming I think people will definitely like that more than a generic message!

grumbledore · October 2013

Onceinalovetime said:

Is it rude to send out generalized thank you cards with the same message in each, instead of personalizing each one?

It was a very sweet message on the inside, I'm just wondering if this is socially acceptable. We are also going to include a professional picture of us.

Yes it's rude, no it's not socially acceptable.

Thank you notes that aren't personalized show no gratitude whatsoever.

climbingsingle · October 2013

alisonmarie658 said:

Unpersonalized thank you cards are beyond lazy. Don't be that couple.

Ditto. And a personal story about that. I went to a christening party for one of my best friend's kids. This girl and I have been best friends since Kindergarten (28 years). I picked out a very nice gift and had it engraved. I got back a picture with a printed message. No hand written note. No mention of my gift. Just a general "Thanks for coming!". I was really put off by that, as was my mother who also sent a very nice gift.

RedJacks25 · October 2013

Every.single.wedding I have attended in the last 2 years that I got a thank you card from, there was only a generic type message inside, or nothing at all. It pisses me off every time. I would almost rather not receive a card then just get the same one that gets sent to everyone.

I get junk mail all the time; I would consider something that wasn't personally directed towards me junk, as well. Hell, our apartment complex frequently sends us a generic "thank you" postcard, thanking us for being residents. I expect more from my friends and family.

MrsRadke · October 2013

I am glad you asked for advice (and will hopefully take it) before doing something like that. Sadly, not everyone runs their bad decisions past fellow knotties first.

mbrooke2008 · October 2013

RedJacks25 said:

Every.single.wedding I have attended in the last 2 years that I got a thank you card from, there was only a generic type message inside, or nothing at all. It pisses me off every time. I would almost rather not receive a card then just get the same one that gets sent to everyone.

I get junk mail all the time; I would consider something that wasn't personally directed towards me junk, as well. Hell, our apartment complex frequently sends us a generic "thank you" postcard, thanking us for being residents. I expect more from my friends and family.

Not sure if I am understanding what a generic type message is. Does that mean it was typed into the actual stationery/card? Or that it was hand written and just seemed generic? I don't have a problem with template based, hand written thank yous that call out your name, the gift given, etc.

bunni727 · October 2013

mbrooke2008 said:

RedJacks25 said:

Every.single.wedding I have attended in the last 2 years that I got a thank you card from, there was only a generic type message inside, or nothing at all. It pisses me off every time. I would almost rather not receive a card then just get the same one that gets sent to everyone.

I get junk mail all the time; I would consider something that wasn't personally directed towards me junk, as well. Hell, our apartment complex frequently sends us a generic "thank you" postcard, thanking us for being residents. I expect more from my friends and family.

Not sure if I am understanding what a generic type message is. Does that mean it was typed into the actual stationery/card? Or that it was hand written and just seemed generic? I don't have a problem with template based, hand written thank yous that call out your name, the gift given, etc.

Pretty much. The cards that say something like "Thank you for sharing in our special day!" or "Thanks for the gift!"

Though I can count on one hand the number I've received, I really think that a completely personalized, handwritten note on every individual card is the only proper way to do it.

Never heard of it, but using a template where you just fill in the name and gift sounds only marginally less lazy and marginally more demonstrative of appreciation than fully pre-printed.

photokitty · October 2013

RedJacks25 said:

Every.single.wedding I have attended in the last 2 years that I got a thank you card from, there was only a generic type message inside, or nothing at all. It pisses me off every time. I would almost rather not receive a card then just get the same one that gets sent to everyone.

And I thought I was lazy for hand writing a similar opening line on each of my thank you notes! How does one just sign their name (if even) and call it a day???

wajohnson09 · October 2013

mimiphin said:

Onceinalovetime said:

Is it rude to send out generalized thank you cards with the same message in each, instead of personalizing each one?

It was a very sweet message on the inside, I'm just wondering if this is socially acceptable. We are also going to include a professional picture of us.

My Little sis (Sorority) did something like this. It was a postcard type thing and was a beautiful general thank you card that had a picture of her and her new hubby which is now displayed on my fridge. BUT she also included a hand written card as well thanking me for the glasses I got her. So to be technical she sent 2 thank you notes in the same envelope.

The Handwritten one means the most to me but I like having her wedding picture on my fridge.

-----------------------------------------------------

My cousin did the same thing- note and a pic. I really like getting wedding picture from the couple, but it's so nice when someone takes the time to write an actual thank you note. It doesn't have to be much, I know your writing 200 of these but I appreciate the effort.

Everyone else complaining about generic thank you's- at least you got an acknowledgement. My childhood friend (since we were babies, 26 years !!!) got married three years ago. I sent gift for bridal shower, attended wedding and gave gift, and after she had baby sent gifts for not one but two baby showers. Have not received a thank you note for any of it! Not impressed.

ETA: rant continued.... I am however on friend's Christmas letter list. Yep, take the time to send me your annual brag letter but don't stamp and address a crappy card for all the stuff I've given you.

Ok, Sorry about the rant, I'm done folks

mbrooke2008 · October 2013

bunni727 said:

mbrooke2008 said:

RedJacks25 said:

Every.single.wedding I have attended in the last 2 years that I got a thank you card from, there was only a generic type message inside, or nothing at all. It pisses me off every time. I would almost rather not receive a card then just get the same one that gets sent to everyone.

I get junk mail all the time; I would consider something that wasn't personally directed towards me junk, as well. Hell, our apartment complex frequently sends us a generic "thank you" postcard, thanking us for being residents. I expect more from my friends and family.

Not sure if I am understanding what a generic type message is. Does that mean it was typed into the actual stationery/card? Or that it was hand written and just seemed generic? I don't have a problem with template based, hand written thank yous that call out your name, the gift given, etc.

Pretty much. The cards that say something like "Thank you for sharing in our special day!" or "Thanks for the gift!"

Though I can count on one hand the number I've received, I really think that a completely personalized, handwritten note on every individual card is the only proper way to do it.

Never heard of it, but using a template where you just fill in the name and gift sounds only marginally less lazy and marginally more demonstrative of appreciation than fully pre-printed.

I don't know I am too concerned about complete personalization. I have never received a thank you that wasn't 100% hand written, while they weren't extremely personalized (mentioned my husband and I, and mentioned the gift we gave them) it was fine by me. I think someone taking the time to hand write me that thank you, even though it may be template based, is good enough for me.

mbrooke2008 · October 2013

wajohnson09 said:

Onceinalovetime said:

Is it rude to send out generalized thank you cards with the same message in each, instead of personalizing each one?

It was a very sweet message on the inside, I'm just wondering if this is socially acceptable. We are also going to include a professional picture of us.

My Little sis (Sorority) did something like this. It was a postcard type thing and was a beautiful general thank you card that had a picture of her and her new hubby which is now displayed on my fridge. BUT she also included a hand written card as well thanking me for the glasses I got her. So to be technical she sent 2 thank you notes in the same envelope.
The Handwritten one means the most to me but I like having her wedding picture on my fridge.
----------------------------------------------------- My cousin did the same thing- note and a pic. I really like getting wedding picture from the couple, but it's so nice when someone takes the time to write an actual thank you note. It doesn't have to be much, I know your writing 200 of these but I appreciate the effort. Everyone else complaining about generic thank you's- at least you got an acknowledgement. My childhood friend (since we were babies, 26 years !!!) got married three years ago. I sent gift for bridal shower, attended wedding and gave gift, and after she had baby sent gifts for not one but two baby showers. Have not received a thank you note for any of it! Not impressed. ETA: rant continued.... I am however on friend's Christmas letter list. Yep, take the time to send me your annual brag letter but don't stamp and address a crappy card for all the stuff I've given you. Ok, Sorry about the rant, I'm done folks

THAT is one of my biggest pet peeves - the Christmas card that turns into a novel of accomplishments and brags! Ugh, I receive a few that I just can't help but laugh at.

photokitty · October 2013

mbrooke2008 said:

wajohnson09 said:

Onceinalovetime said:

Is it rude to send out generalized thank you cards with the same message in each, instead of personalizing each one?

It was a very sweet message on the inside, I'm just wondering if this is socially acceptable. We are also going to include a professional picture of us.

My Little sis (Sorority) did something like this. It was a postcard type thing and was a beautiful general thank you card that had a picture of her and her new hubby which is now displayed on my fridge. BUT she also included a hand written card as well thanking me for the glasses I got her. So to be technical she sent 2 thank you notes in the same envelope.
The Handwritten one means the most to me but I like having her wedding picture on my fridge.
----------------------------------------------------- My cousin did the same thing- note and a pic. I really like getting wedding picture from the couple, but it's so nice when someone takes the time to write an actual thank you note. It doesn't have to be much, I know your writing 200 of these but I appreciate the effort. Everyone else complaining about generic thank you's- at least you got an acknowledgement. My childhood friend (since we were babies, 26 years !!!) got married three years ago. I sent gift for bridal shower, attended wedding and gave gift, and after she had baby sent gifts for not one but two baby showers. Have not received a thank you note for any of it! Not impressed. ETA: rant continued.... I am however on friend's Christmas letter list. Yep, take the time to send me your annual brag letter but don't stamp and address a crappy card for all the stuff I've given you. Ok, Sorry about the rant, I'm done folks

THAT is one of my biggest pet peeves - the Christmas card that turns into a novel of accomplishments and brags! Ugh, I receive a few that I just can't help but laugh at.

DITTO! I hate the mass produced "look how awesome we are" Xmas letter.

Me - I send Xmas postcards from VistaPrint. You can see how awesome we are instead of us telling you all about in a letter you don't/won't want to read! (and it's cheaper postage) ;-p

RedJacks25 · October 2013

photokitty said:

RedJacks25 said:

Every.single.wedding I have attended in the last 2 years that I got a thank you card from, there was only a generic type message inside, or nothing at all. It pisses me off every time. I would almost rather not receive a card then just get the same one that gets sent to everyone.

And I thought I was lazy for hand writing a similar opening line on each of my thank you notes! How does one just sign their name (if even) and call it a day???

We got one recently that had a picture of the wedding cake on the front with a "Thanks!" underneath it. When you turned it over, the space on the postcard where you're supposed to write, was blank. WTF.

ETA: We apparently just know some very lazy, ungrateful people. FI and I have vowed to be as personalized as humanly possible when writing our thanks yous. Luckily it pisses him off as much as it does me.

climbingsingle · October 2013

Christmas letters are the worst! I used to get one where the girl broke down each month.

January: We went bowling!

Um. No one cares.

The same thank you cards?

Re: The same thank you cards?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards