Are my ideas tacky?

Re: Are my ideas tacky?

• emilyb213 member

  

  August 2013

  kvschwartz said:

  I grew up 3 hours away from where I live now and a good amount of my guests will be good friends that I only see once a year, if that. So I want my wedding to be more of a "party." All I care about is that everyone has a good time and stays entertained. Are these ideas of mine TOO tacky or out-there? (We are 26 years old.)

  
  

  - I want to hire a caricaturist, a fortune teller and magician

  The only one of these that I think is okay is the caricaturist, since I don't see this being much different than a photo booth. Fortune tellers and magicians are more along the lines of performers, and your reception should be a thank you for your guests, not a performance they have to sit through. Save your money on all of these and use it towards your honeymoon.

  - My friends are very musical and would be invited to bring their instruments to play tasteful songs for everyone

  Are you having a DJ or a band as well? If not, I don't think this is a good idea, since you'll basically be asking your friends to perform at your wedding for free, and back to my point in #1, the reception is a thank you to them.

  - I want to set up a little art station where guests can decorate their photo booth prints

  While this isn't my speed, I don't see anything that goes against etiquette with this...it just seems unnecessary and probably won't be well-used (in my experience at weddings, guests are mostly interested in eating, drinking, and dancing). This is something you'd be better off skipping and using the money for your honeymoon. Also, would you have a photobooth and a caricature artist? That seems like overkill.

  - I want to raffle off donated pieces of art - here comes the possibly tacky party...if every guests receives free tickets, can I give them the option of purchasing additional tickets for $1 to go toward our honeymoon?

  Why are you raffling off art? Who is donating this art? Who benefits? (I'm assuming you and your fiance will be the beneficiaries.) Nope, sorry, your wedding isn't a charity fundraiser, and no one should be donating raffle items or buying raffling tickets. This is tacky.

  - Is it tacky to give guests the option of bringing a bottle of liquor for additional raffle tickets?

  Yes.

  
  

  Thanks!

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• southernbelle0915 mod

  

  August 2013

  kvschwartz said:

  I grew up 3 hours away from where I live now and a good amount of my guests will be good friends that I only see once a year, if that. So I want my wedding to be more of a "party." All I care about is that everyone has a good time and stays entertained. Are these ideas of mine TOO tacky or out-there? (We are 26 years old.)

  
  

  - I want to hire a caricaturist, a fortune teller and magician This isn't "tacky" per se but it depends on the feel you want for your wedding. To me, it seems a little more like a high school post-prom or carnival and I would advise spending your money on better food or a live band.

  - My friends are very musical and would be invited to bring their instruments to play tasteful songs for everyone As guests, they should be entertained - not be the entertainers... even if they do enjoy playing. Host them by hiring entertainment.

  - I want to set up a little art station where guests can decorate their photo booth prints Not tacky - sounds fine.

  - I want to raffle off donated pieces of art - here comes the possibly tacky party...if every guests receives free tickets, can I give them the option of purchasing additional tickets for $1 to go toward our honeymoon? This is tacky. If you want to give people art, then just give it to them. Do not "raffle" it or sell anything. This sounds like a fundraiser and is tacky.

  - Is it tacky to give guests the option of bringing a bottle of liquor for additional raffle tickets? This is also tacky. As the host, you should provide liquor if you want to offer alcohol. Skip the magician, artist, photo booth, and fortune teller and host an open bar. 

  
  

  Thanks!

  People have the most fun if there's good food, good entertainment (provided by someone else) and open bar. Put your money in those places and your wedding will be a blast.

  *********************************************************************************

  
  

  

  Report0 Reply
• bunni727 member

  

  August 2013

  I don't want to say they are tacky, but some of the ideas are better and more appropriate than others.
  
  I would stick with the caricaturist, fortune teller, and art station. These are all optional fun things that can be set off to the side for guests to visit if they choose, whereas a magician and impromptu jam session would break up natural conversations or dancing, if you have it.
  
  The fundraiser things are best left to fundraisers for charities. Just put the money you would be spending on the magician toward the honeymoon, pay the rest yourselves, and anything you get in cards at the wedding can go for upgrades.
  

  

  Report2 Reply
• richter2 member

  

  August 2013

  kvschwartz said:

  I grew up 3 hours away from where I live now and a good amount of my guests will be good friends that I only see once a year, if that. So I want my wedding to be more of a "party." All I care about is that everyone has a good time and stays entertained. Are these ideas of mine TOO tacky or out-there? (We are 26 years old.)

  
  

  - I want to hire a caricaturist, a fortune teller and magician

  My feeling on this is that your guests will be more focused on dinner, drinks and dancing than these performers. And if you are doing a photo booth, isn't a caricaturist the same thing? I would pick one or the other, not both. I agree with emilyb213, save your money for the honeymoon.

  - My friends are very musical and would be invited to bring their instruments to play tasteful songs for everyone

  I don't see anything wrong with this, however, if these friends are going to provide the only music at your wedding, are you willing to offer to pay for their services? I am hiring a friend to play guitar and sing at my wedding during cocktail hour, but he will be paid for his performance and will also be invited to the reception as a guest.

  - I want to set up a little art station where guests can decorate their photo booth prints

  Same as above, your guests will likely not use this station much. Save your money for the honeymoon. Or instead, maybe have the photo booth print two copies of each photo, one for the guests to take home as a favor and one for them to put in a guest book for you. They can sign and decorate the pages of the guest book next to their photo print. This can be a wonderful keepsake to remind you of your wedding day.

  - I want to raffle off donated pieces of art - here comes the possibly tacky party...if every guests receives free tickets, can I give them the option of purchasing additional tickets for $1 to go toward our honeymoon?

  Contrary to the other posters, I don't think that asking for donations to your honeymoon is tacky. People do this all the time through traditions like the "money dance" and even "honeymoon fund" jars. I personally think the money dance is a fun way to do it, but if you feel your guests would appreciate taking home a piece of art, why not? 

  - Is it tacky to give guests the option of bringing a bottle of liquor for additional raffle tickets?

  This depends entirely on your venue. Most venues don't allow outside alcohol, but if they do, I say go for it!

  Thanks!

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• Gustafson28 member

  

  September 2013

  kvschwartz said:

  I grew up 3 hours away from where I live now and a good amount of my guests will be good friends that I only see once a year, if that. So I want my wedding to be more of a "party." All I care about is that everyone has a good time and stays entertained. Are these ideas of mine TOO tacky or out-there? (We are 26 years old.)

  
  

  - I want to hire a caricaturist, a fortune teller and magician

  The only one of these that I think is okay is the caricaturist, since I don't see this being much different than a photo booth. Fortune tellers and magicians are more along the lines of performers, and your reception should be a thank you for your guests, not a performance they have to sit through. Save your money on all of these and use it towards your honeymoon.

  - My friends are very musical and would be invited to bring their instruments to play tasteful songs for everyone

  Are you having a DJ or a band as well? If not, I don't think this is a good idea, since you'll basically be asking your friends to perform at your wedding for free, and back to my point in #1, the reception is a thank you to them.

  - I want to set up a little art station where guests can decorate their photo booth prints

  While this isn't my speed, I don't see anything that goes against etiquette with this...it just seems unnecessary and probably won't be well-used (in my experience at weddings, guests are mostly interested in eating, drinking, and dancing). This is something you'd be better off skipping and using the money for your honeymoon. Also, would you have a photobooth and a caricature artist? That seems like overkill.

  - I want to raffle off donated pieces of art - here comes the possibly tacky party...if every guests receives free tickets, can I give them the option of purchasing additional tickets for $1 to go toward our honeymoon?

  Why are you raffling off art? Who is donating this art? Who benefits? (I'm assuming you and your fiance will be the beneficiaries.) Nope, sorry, your wedding isn't a charity fundraiser, and no one should be donating raffle items or buying raffling tickets. This is tacky.

  - Is it tacky to give guests the option of bringing a bottle of liquor for additional raffle tickets?

  Yes.

  
  

  Thanks!

  
  

  Ditto

  Report0 Reply
• SteffJay member

  

  October 2013

  everything is tacky to somebody. 

  
  

  do what feels right.

  
  

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• [Deleted User] member

  

  October 2013

  First let me say that I like the sort of carnival vibe that you seem to be putting out there.  You know your crowd, if you believe they would find the performers entertaining, then go for it.  I think most of it is fine, except for the last bits involving raffles/tickets/your guests purchasing anything.

  I would avoid that type of stuff because it can come off as money grubbing, even if that's not your intent at all.

  
  

  
  

  Report0 Reply
• Megusler member

  

  November 2013

  SteffJay said:

  everything is tacky to somebody. 

  
  

  do what feels right.

  
  

  
  

  My ditto vote goes here. It's your wedding and you decide what's tacky and not. 

  
  

  Report1 Reply
• kannf1982 member

  

  January 2014

  - The bottle of liquor thing - wouldnt ask for that.

  - All the caricature/music/art - offbeat yes, but fun and differen, NOT tacky

  - money for honeymoon - I am torn on this one.  In a general sense I feel this trend toward people having honeymoon funds is super distasteful.  Adults asking other adults for money toward a vacation just seems odd to me. BUT on the other hand i dont judge the people that choose to do it - i just wish it wasnt a "thing". It is true that wedding costs are just so absurd these days and many young adults and even couples in their 30s are struggling to do everythnig (weddings, houses, kids, keep their jobs, colleg costs, etc) so i understand why a honeymoon fund is starting to be seen more as practical/acceptable than it used to be. So i think i could go either way on that one.

  
  

  At the end of the day, its your wedding so its up to you!

  
  

  I am going to CA to get married and then were doing something similar - having a party at home.  Still torn on whether to get a Dj. 

  Report0 Reply
• kannf1982 member

  

  January 2014

  you are right - no matter what you do somebody will say it is tacky.  Hell, if someone who can afford it spends $100K on the classiest weddingo f all time and treats their guests like royalty, even then, someone will say its ostentatious and excessive and TACKY.  When it comes to big groups of people you arent going to please everybody!!!!

  Report0 Reply
• novella1186 member

  

  July 2014

  Totally agree

  

  Report0 Reply
• michellef2014 member

  

  July 2014

  I wouldn't do the fundraiser, but your friends playing music and the whole vibe sounds super cool.

  Report0 Reply