Honeymoon Registries

JWooTimes2 · October 2013

What sites have people used for Honeymoon Registries and what did you like/not like about them?

manateehugger · October 2013

I don't like that:

1. They ask your guest for cash - which is really tacky.

2. They are deceptive - your guest thinks they are buying you a couples' massage on the beach, but in reality the honeymoon registry site cuts you a check MINUS a service fee - so you get less money anyway.

3. You could just not register if you don't want household gifts and people will give you cash to use toward the honeymoon.

They're a bad idea all around. Just say no!

JWooTimes2 · October 2013

I personally think they are a good way for friends and family to give us what we want and wouldn't be able to get otherwise. I have gotten a lot of good feedback from our friends and family that think its a great idea. Really just researching for the site that has the most positive feedback for this service.

manateehugger · October 2013

JWooTimes2 said:

I personally think they are a good way for friends and family to give us what we want and wouldn't be able to get otherwise. I have gotten a lot of good feedback from our friends and family that think its a great idea. Really just researching for the site that has the most positive feedback for this service.

Look honeymoon registries give you cash - that's what they do. It might be cash toward a specific purpose, but it's still cash.

Just don't register, if people ask what you'd like, tell them you are saving up for a honeymoon.

And again, they might sound fine in theory, but start telling your family and friends that your honeymoon registry site is going to take a cut off their monetary gift and see if they still think it's a great idea.

ETA: I could write you a personal check for $100. Or I could "buy" you a massage - in which case you end up with a $97 check from honeyfund or whatever. Which sounds better?

Maggie0829 · October 2013

How about this. HM registries take a percentage from your gift as a fee for using their site. So say the site charges a 7% fee on each dollar given by your guest towards an "excursion" or "dinner" (I put them in quotations because what you are really getting is just a check from the site, nothing booked, nothing reserved, just a check). So lets say you invite 200 couples to your wedding. Each couple gives you $100 towards something on your HM registry. What you end up getting in the form of a check from the site is $9300. You are thinking "wow that is awesome." But think of this, without using a HM registry those same guests can give you $100 in a card and you get to keep the whole $10K instead of losing $700 to fees.

Wouldn't you rather have the full $10K then losing $700 to site just so that they will cut you a check and not book anything for your HM?

JWooTimes2 · October 2013

Thank you for your opinion, however again, not requesting your opinion on the actual idea, just looking for actual honeymoon registry sites that people have used and their feedback of them.

manateehugger · October 2013

JWooTimes2 said:

Thank you for your opinion, however again, not requesting your opinion on the actual idea, just looking for actual honeymoon registry sites that people have used and their feedback of them.

Ok seriously? You want to find a site that will cheat you and your guests out of money? I can't help you there.

ETA: And it's not an opinion - the service fees and check-cutting are cold hard facts.

Maggie0829 · October 2013

@JWooTimes2 - I would really like your opinion on my post. Are you really okay with giving up a chunk of money just to use a website? If you are, then by all means go ahead and use one. But for the life of me I cannot think of a single person who would be willing to fork over a portion of their gift just to get cut a check by a website.

Maggie0829 · October 2013

@PDKH - That is the second time I have given actual numbers to show what couples would potentially be losing by using a HM registry and both times neither bride comments on it. I mean, if I saw that I could potentially lose out on $700 I would be ditching that HM registry idea as quick as possible. I just don't get it. I really don't.

manateehugger · October 2013

Maggie0829 said:

@PDKH - That is the second time I have given actual numbers to show what couples would potentially be losing by using a HM registry and both times neither bride comments on it. I mean, if I saw that I could potentially lose out on $700 I would be ditching that HM registry idea as quick as possible. I just don't get it. I really don't.

I know! I don't get it either! You don't think honeymoon registries are tacky? I disagree, but ok fine. But yeah, why anyone would voluntarily lose money through a website instead of just getting a personal check is beyond me.

JWooTimes2 · October 2013

@Maggie0829. If you will refer to my original post, I am inquiring to see who has actually used these honeymoon registry sites and their feedback on them whether it be good or bad. I have done a lot of research on many sites and all have different feedback. I would like to get some personal feedback from brides that have used these and decide whether the fees were that big of a deal to them in the end. Yes, some sites charge fees, and it depends on the site how you work out the fees. I like the idea of the the actual registry that people can say, I would like for them to get to go to dinner at restaurant X, and then us being able to actually redeem that gift. I feel that is is less tacky to actually say these are the things that I want then to not register and hope for cash. If we did a traditional wedding registry and someone bought a gift online and mailed it to us, they would be charged shipping, depending on the site, that could be your "service charge".

manateehugger · October 2013

Why would you even be willing to accept the possibility of a fee???

How would the fee worth it when you could just get a personal check from the guest instead???

Why couldn't the guest call a restaurant up and say "I'd like a gift certificate please"???

Why would registering for cash be less tacky than not registering???

I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!!!

Maggie0829 · October 2013

JWooTimes2 said:

@Maggie0829. If you will refer to my original post, I am inquiring to see who has actually used these honeymoon registry sites and their feedback on them whether it be good or bad. I have done a lot of research on many sites and all have different feedback. I would like to get some personal feedback from brides that have used these and decide whether the fees were that big of a deal to them in the end. Yes, some sites charge fees, and it depends on the site how you work out the fees. I like the idea of the the actual registry that people can say, I would like for them to get to go to dinner at restaurant X, and then us being able to actually redeem that gift. I feel that is is less tacky to actually say these are the things that I want then to not register and hope for cash. If we did a traditional wedding registry and someone bought a gift online and mailed it to us, they would be charged shipping, depending on the site, that could be your "service charge".

@JWooTimes2 - You still aren't getting it. YOU DON"T GET THE ITEM YOU REGISTER FOR! All you get is a check, minus a fee that your guest may or may not know about, and maybe a letter saying "Sue bought this for you." Nothing gets booked. Nothing gets reserved. Nothing. So all you have is a check for less then what your guest was willing to get you and you still have to do all the work to book the damn excursion.

And as for someone buying you a physical gift and shipping it to you. Well the guest knows and accepts the fees and pays for those fees themselves so you don't lose out on anything. A lot of times with HM registries guests do not know that their $100 gift to you is actually only ending up to be a $93 because of the website fees. That is really deceptive. The guests should be fully aware of what fees are included in something when they go to purchase that product. They should also know that if they buy you that "swimming with the dolphins" excursion you registered for that you actually aren't getting that excursion but rather just a damn check which they could have given to you themselves with a note saying "use this on something fun on your HM."

And not registering is not rude. Registering is not a requirement. There is nothing wrong with saying "Oh we really don't need anything else for our home, it is just overflowing with things already. We are just focusing on saving up for our much needed HM to decompress and relax after the wedding is over with." People are not stupid. They know that cash is a gift that everyone under the sun wants.

And you never did answer my question. Are you really okay with losing out on possibly a few hundred dollars to use the HM registry?

manateehugger · October 2013

And your shipping/tax comparison doesn't make sense. Honeymoon registries give you LESS THAN THE TRUE VALUE of the original gift!

If I buy you a salt and pepper shaker set, and the store only gives you a salt shaker, then you could compare it.

JWooTimes2 · October 2013

I personally think both of you are being very rude about your responses. I am simply asking for actual opinions on specific sites not your opinion on the service. It doesn't matter why I want these opinions or my thoughts on them. I do fully understand the sites and the fees, so your statement about me "not getting it" is ridiculous. Everyone is of course entitled to their own opinions as I am and you are, but you aren't answering my question either. I don't know if I want to join a site with a fee or not, because I haven't researched all the sites as of yet. This was simply a post to see if anyone had used a site and if they liked it or not. Clearly, that isn't the responses that I will get for this, so I will look elsewhere, where actually I have already gotten some positive feedback about which sites people liked and what they liked about them.

Maggie0829 · October 2013

JWooTimes2 said:

I personally think both of you are being very rude about your responses. I am simply asking for actual opinions on specific sites not your opinion on the service. It doesn't matter why I want these opinions or my thoughts on them. I do fully understand the sites and the fees, so your statement about me "not getting it" is ridiculous. Everyone is of course entitled to their own opinions as I am and you are, but you aren't answering my question either. I don't know if I want to join a site with a fee or not, because I haven't researched all the sites as of yet. This was simply a post to see if anyone had used a site and if they liked it or not. Clearly, that isn't the responses that I will get for this, so I will look elsewhere, where actually I have already gotten some positive feedback about which sites people liked and what they liked about them.

@JWooTimes2 - Well I think you are very rude for not answering my question. Are you really willing to give up possibly a few hundred dollars in fees to use a HM registry website? And if you don't come back to answer this question them I am just going to assume that you really never thought about the actual math before and just don't want to admit that you are wrong.

Edit: And if it helps I will answer your question. No I did not use a HM registry because I did not want to be rude to my guests by asking them for money. So now that I answered yours, will you answer mine?

JWooTimes2 · October 2013

I am not wrong. I am simply looking for feedback on a particular service. And if you had done your research you would know that there are ways to use these services without the fees.

Maggie0829 · October 2013

JWooTimes2 said:

I am not wrong. I am simply looking for feedback on a particular service. And if you had done your research you would know that there are ways to use these services without the fees.

But I didn't want to do research on them because I didn't want to use them because they are rude to your guests.

And you still haven't answered my question. I answered yours now you should give me the same courtesy and answer mine.

manateehugger · October 2013

I need to become a travel agent and start my own honeymoon registry site.

"Oh you want a massage? Sure, here's a money left over from one of your guest's checks. Don't worry, I already took my cut - trip advisor has got a list of good spas. Good luck booking one!"

Best. Job. Ever.

Maggie0829 · October 2013

@JWooTimes2 - And I just did a quick search for HM registries that do not charge any fees. HoneyFund was the first one that popped up. Apparently to not have a fee charged to you or your guest the guest will just send a check or paypal payment (but doesn't paypal charge you a fee to use their site?) directly to you. So what is the point of the actual registry? I mean can't your guest just send you a check in the amount that they want with a note saying "use this on your HM" without the need of the registry? I really just don't get it.

Cokezerofreak · October 2013

After my fiance asked me to research it since the honeymoon travel agent mentioned one that would come with her service, I found that too, @Maggie0829. What's the point of the "free" stuff if they'll give you a check anyway? And HoneyFund wasn't the one she suggested so a big no from me.

As I've said in other posts, if people want to give you cash they will. If they want to get you a gift, they will. Say "Thank you" when you receive either.

jenniferurs · October 2013

I have a registry with my honeymoon hotel, where the money actually goes directly toward lunch/dinner/spa, etc.. In those cases, I don't think there's anything wrong with it; it's no different from asking for a tangible gift. But yeah, I don't understand why people would want to lose out to fees.

Maggie0829 · October 2013

jenniferurs said:

I have a registry with my honeymoon hotel, where the money actually goes directly toward lunch/dinner/spa, etc.. In those cases, I don't think there's anything wrong with it; it's no different from asking for a tangible gift. But yeah, I don't understand why people would want to lose out to fees.

That is the only type of HM registry I support. Because your guests are actually purchasing you something tangible.

L3Birdies · November 2013

I used Disney Honeymoon Registry which is operated by Honeymoon Wishes. DO NOT use them! Disney is awesome and has been super helpful through the process, but Honeymoon Wishes is a very unethical and unprofessional business. They tell you there is no fee then still charge PER GIFT a 7% fee. Also, when you call to sort it out, the representatives are rude and impatient. I do NOT recommend any company, product, or service operated by Honeymoon Wishes.

I do recommend Disney, though! They were polite, very helpful and accommodating of the losses I had from Honeymoon Wishes.

NYCMercedes · November 2013

I sent to the Sandals HM registry to see if I wanted to use it for a friend. The fee was $12.95! How stupid! Didn't use it. Both B&G each make well over $100K per year, not that that's relevant, but I thought, "Why are you asking for money?" And having me pay a fee. I just sent them a check.

NYCBruin · November 2013

Aside from the rudeness, I don't understand why couples want to throw money away.

Do these people also go out of their way to use ATMs of other banks so they get hit with fees?

I don't get it.

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