My SO and I have been together a long while (Yes, I have really lost count, because I'm horrible at keeping track of anniversaries. He could tell you, if you asked him...) and we do consider ourselves engaged (Though sort of ringless, due to brokeness- He gave me the silver band that he normally wears as a promise that he'll get me something 'better' one day). We're both having issues with our families because despite being committed to each other and considering ourselves engaged, both families are throwing fits about a ring not being present. We're both in our 20's, and both working shit jobs to make ends meet. He can't even afford to move out of his parents house, so we can't even live together. We see each other once a week because of work and school schedules (He's almost done with his bachelors, I'm still working on my associates), if we can manage that. Make no mistake, these issues don't make us want to give up- if anything, it makes the few hours we do get together all the more special because they're so few and so perfect. We have spent extended amounts of time together before, so we do know we can, we just never have the chance right now.
We both know where we want to be- since I was about 13 I've wanted to move to Montana because of the cold and the mountains, and his whole life he's wanted to be somewhere with open fields and cold weather- so Montana is perfect for both of us. We know we want a big house with a wrap around porch, a stable with horses, and adopted children (because I cant conceive and he's sterile) running around. We know what we want, but the issue is getting from HERE to THERE. I don't mind waiting for a ring, waiting for a wedding, waiting for that life, but sometimes it feels SO FAR AWAY and right here feels so...stuck. Don't get me wrong, I love him, he loves me, and we're going to get there, but sometimes we both feel stuck in ruts- I'm a preschool teacher and he's a mechanic, and neither of us are where we want to be. I get it, we're young, there's time, and we are so very happy to have each other during the hard times we're both having right now. I fall in love with him all over again every time I see him, and everything we've done in our lives has been a build up to THERE. Our daily lives are all about finding ways to get closer to the dream- saving money, picking up side jobs, texting or talking on the phone late at night when we're both exhausted, and the one day a week that we see each other is all about catching up, talking about the future, talking about each other, and sharing our hopes.
I guess I just need to know how to...Deal with being where I am, instead of where I want to be? I don't know. It feels like we're crawling, and we enjoy the now, but we want to enjoy the future. How do I deal with being stuck, and what can I tell him to help him deal with it too? Is this normal? Or is this a "you're young" thing? (Remember, we are both in our early 20's)