Is it terrible to ask my bridesmaids to order a dress they can't firs try on?

Re: Is it terrible to ask my bridesmaids to order a dress they can't firs try on?

• AddieCake member

  

  November 2013

  vlglennon21 said:

  I'm having a huge dilemma when it comes to my bridesmaid dresses.  It's very important to me that my bridesmaids look and feel beautiful.  I have yet to see a "traditional" bridesmaid dress that I find flattering/like.  Sorry, I don't mean to offend anyone it's just my personal preference. I have found a gorgeous bridesmaid dress by Mackenzie Michael. It's perfect and absolutely what I want.  My bridesmaids live in two different states and I'm currently living out of the country with my fiancee.  It is impossible to coordinate all of our schedules so that we can go try on dresses together, so I asked them to go in groups. I found the shops that carried the Mackenzie Michael's line and sent all the info to my girls.  The problem now is that none of the shops carry the specific dress I want.  Am I terrible for wanting my bridesmaids to buy the dresses anyway without trying them on? 

  
  

  Thanks in advance for recommendations  

  What if they don't fit?  Are they returnable? You'll just be back in the same boat needing dresses if they don't fit or look good, and if they are not returnable, I would not order it. 

  
  

  
  

  What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14

  

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• msuprincess04 member

  

  November 2013 edited November 2013

  Do the stores carry a similar style? The color isn't a problem, but the dress really should be tried on before ordered, unless it's returnable. Have you considered a department store? My girls ordered dresses from Nordstrom without trying them on. But, since it's returnable it wasn't a problem. Luckily, they loved their dresses and it didn't end up being an issue. 

  "There is always some madness in love. But there is also always some reason in madness." -Friedrich Nietzsche, "On Reading and Writing"

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• saric83 member

  

  November 2013

  Do any of the shops happen to carry one that is kind of similar that they could try?  Otherwise, I think it's pretty risky depending on the dress style.  Some dresses lend themselves to varied body styles much better than others, but it would suck for them to pay a lot of money on a dress that alterations still can't make look good.  

  
  

  Will you share the link with the dress, so we can see the style?

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• mysticl member

  

  November 2013

  
  

  CatholicWife13 said:

  Agree with Addie.  If there is a customer friendly return policy, I say go for it.  If not, then choose a different style.  

  That's fine if it's just an issue of size, but if the style doesn't work on one then they all need to return their dresses and start over looking for one that does work.  Unless the bride is ok with everyone in a different style.  

  

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• PrettyGirlLost member

  

  November 2013

  I'd never order a dress I couldn't try on 1st unless I could return it.
  

  
  "Love is the one thing we're capable of perceiving that transcends time and space."
  
  

  
  

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• netskyblue2 member

  

  November 2013

  Ask your bridesmaids.  Some people care, some don't.
  
  I was a bridesmaid in both my sisters' weddings last year and ordered dresses online without ever seeing them.  Didn't bother me, but it would some.  One, my mom took in at the bust, but the other fit perfect.  (This, after Mom telling me she thought the size I was ordering might be too SMALL.  Ha.  I am an accomplished knitter and design my own sweaters.  I know my measurements, Mom :P)
  
  One set of BM dresses wasn't the exact color we were expecting, but since the bride was not upset by it, we bridesmaids didn't worry about it, either.
  

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• cowgirl8238 member

  

  November 2013

  There are a few factors that one needs to consider in this situation.

  1.  Is this dress within ALL of their budgets.  If they buy and return does that cost them anything out of pocket?  Any fees shipping in either direction is part of the budget.

  2.  Are all of your girls similar in body type...as in a single style would look good on everyone, if not (and in general) I would highly recomend picking a color, length and fabric type and letting the girls choose their own styles based on what they are comfortable with.

  3.  Find out if the girls would be comfortable with the idea of ordering the dress online...I know I wouldn't be.

  Good luck!

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• vlglennon21 member

  

  November 2013

  Thanks everyone for all your advice, I figured everything out, and have selected a dress that is returnable in the event that it doesn't fit appropriately or look nice on  

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• clg1213 member

  

  November 2013

  I was in two weddings last year and in both I ordered the dress w/o having tried it on or seen it in person.  In both cases, the dresses worked out fine.  I guess it doesn't strike me as a big deal since it is what I've seen (only in one other wedding, same deal there). 

  As for my wedding, one BM came and looked at the dress with me, but they didn't have one in/near her size.  The other two ordered it with just the online pic and talking to the dress shop lady about sizes.  They haven't come in yet, but it isn't on my worry list.

  IMHO, it is awesome if BMs love their dresses, but ultimately the only thing that really matters is they are comfortable enough to wear it on one day.  I wouldn't expect a BM dress to be my dream dress and would just order what the bride asked me to and have alterations done if there's a major fit issue

  

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