this is the code for the render ad
Destination Weddings Discussions

Why is my grandmother making me feel bad about being excited for my wedding?

So Im having a destination wedding in Key West next year. Ive been planning for a while with my mom and trying to include my dad's mom in my planning. I showed her pics of the venue and the lodging and the STDs that im mailing out tomorrow (YAY!) but shes being mean to me! I designed the STDs myself with photoshop and created boarding passes with cool handmade envelopes with the all the info printed on the inside sleeve with a cute little picture of south Florida and everything. Grammy keeps saying everything is stupid. "Getting married in Key West is stupid. You're going overboard. The wedding isnt until next Sept why are you planning now?" and my personal favorite, every time I try to get her opinion or gush about the great deal I got for our cruise reception she says, "I dont want to talk about it." She literally gets angry and changes the subject! Its not like the woman is in her 80's and doesnt get it. Shes only 67! It makes me feel bad about being excited. Am i going overboard? Everytime I leave her house I get in this funk like everything im planning or choosing isnt nice or isnt right or maybe it was too early or maybe it was stupid to get married at the beach. :sigh: 

Re: Why is my grandmother making me feel bad about being excited for my wedding?

  • I'm sorry you are going through this. It sucks. And I can really relate to you. There are some people who only want to talk to me about my wedding, and there are some who make me feel like I'm super boring when I talk about my wedding. It took a while to get the hint: some people really don't want to hear about it. 

    This is the best piece of advice I got about two months into feeling crappy about it: Don't bring it up. Let her bring it up if she wants to talk about it, but it probably seems to her right now that it's all you are talking about. She might want details, but let her ask for them. 

    In the meantime, talk to us about it. your StDs sound AWESOME. I, for one, would love to see them. And it sounds like your mom is also really involved. What I'm saying is, it's not like you don't have people to talk to, bounce ideas off of. Let Grammy be Grammy. When all is said and done, she will probably have a great time and brag to all of her friends about how amazing your Key West wedding bash was. 
  • great advice! I didnt think I was talking about it so much but i probably was. Attached pics of the STDs the outside reads Save the Week with a Starfish and wrapped with twine and a silver starfish charm. super easy! Got the template online for the boarding passes and envelopes for free
  • @twiggy327 ...  They look amazing!!!  And do not worry some people just act that way, even family...

    I think most of us on this board have had it one way or another.  I had friends do that to me to the point of I lost a best friend because she didn't like the fact I got engaged before her.  

    You are just going to have people like that.  I really hope as it gets closer she gets happier!!! 


    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • They look lovely! And so much information. You should be proud and want to talk about them. 

    I loved our save the dates. My sister designed them, beautifully. I expected for people to call and at least say that they got it and they were excited, maybe even tell me they were pretty. We never got one. single. compliment. I'm telling you this just in case the same thing happens to you. It doesn't mean they aren't excited. It actually means that you put enough info on them that they don't have any questions.
  • Weddings bring out the strangest emotions in people - 10 months until you're wedding is not that much time to plan, especially since it's a destination wedding.  If you're having all the details and aspects in the wedding that you absolutely love, then you aren't going overboard.  You're supposed to have fun with it!
  • @twiggy327--Those are awesome!!!

    Please feel free to come in here and chat with us as much as you would like :) 
  • Try to take whatever she says with a grain of salt.  Even though she's a younger grandma, she's certainly still from a generation where weddings were much more simple and planned in a much shorter time frame, certainly not a year or so which is the norm now, so any kind of DW will seem overboard.  

    My parents initially kind of thought that too, but once I explained to them the approximate costs for a local wedding with our extended family and friends versus the costs for a DW with a smaller group, they all of a sudden realized that it wasn't nearly as crazy as they first thought. :)  So for the invites, she might think that all of the extra detail you put into it cost a lot and wasn't necessary, but in reality you making them yourself was probably much cheaper than getting even rather plain ones done. 
  • Remember Grandma is from a different generation....maybe she is afraid to fly to the destination? She is probably annoyed she has to travel for a wedding. Who knows? 

    The Save the Dates look awesome! 

    I am getting married in October of next year and I have come to the conclusion that I will only talk about the wedding when someone else brings up the subject.  Every time I talk about my wedding plans, someone has a negative comment.  My mom asked me the other day, "why don't you just wear a suit"?  Really?  Suits are fine but my wedding is formal...a suit would not be appropriate.  Then she says she is spending only $50 for something to wear.  I just say to myself, "WHATEVER"! End of conversation.  
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards