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anyone else having problems w/ their GROOMZILLAS!?!?!

christin83christin83 member
5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
in Wedding Woes
i am going crazy!!!! i never envisioned my groom wanting to be SOOOO involved in the wedding planning!  he is a damn bridezilla....groomzilla!  i'm sorry to anyone religious but we have to get married at his church cuz he is greek orthodox and thats where his family was all married so i have come to terms w/ that...but then we found a reception location that is (yes offering discounts here and there but...) charging an arm and a leg still, i think.  its also not really what i had in mind or my taste...its kinda gaudy just like the church is.  i found an american legion venue nearby that is beautiful (and way cheap!)...all hardwood everything but we have to bring everything in unlike the other all inclusive (all expensive) place.  and then he has the nerve to say that maybe we should find a place that we can rent our centerpieces even though he knows i am and have been working on them.  i always thought wedding planning would be fun, but he is just making it stressful and i kinda wish he'd turn into most of the other uninvolved grooms!!! thanks for listening...i just needed to rant!
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Re: anyone else having problems w/ their GROOMZILLAS!?!?!

  • hlvonbhlvonb member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer First Comment
    @christin83

    Feel free to rant any time. I think it is great that he wants to be involved and I am sorry it is stressing you out. Have you sat down and talked to him about it. Say something like "I love that you're wanting to be involved but ......" and explain how you feel. You could also think about dividing the planning. Like he is in charge of XYZ and your in charge of ABC and you both agree on LMN
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  • PolarBearFitzPolarBearFitz member
    First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2013
    hlvonb said:
    @christin83

    Feel free to rant any time. I think it is great that he wants to be involved and I am sorry it is stressing you out. Have you sat down and talked to him about it. Say something like "I love that you're wanting to be involved but ......" and explain how you feel. You could also think about dividing the planning. Like he is in charge of XYZ and your in charge of ABC and you both agree on LMN
    This sounds like excellent advice to me. And poor girl sorry you guys aren't seeing eye to eye! Vent away!
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  • kerbohlkerbohl member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its First Answer
    I'm getting married in my FI's church as well, and it has been the biggest headache.  I'm sorry for the stress - I hear you!  Wedding planning is not fun for everyone, believe me.  I think that is a myth from the wedding industry - whoever saied this is the "happiest time of your life" was either missing something or lying if my experience means anything. 
    Hlvonb has great advice - talk to him about it.  And divide things up according to your strengths!  If you are doing centerpieces, obviously you like doing that and have it covered - so he isn't needed for that.  You don't have to do everything together, but it is good to run things by each other as a heads up.  As in "I'm doing centerpieces like this", and then proceed unless he has a reasonable reason to not like it.  Like if you were doing swastikas and he is Jewish (extreme examples, but so that you get my drift.  I know you aren't doing that for centerpieces . . . )

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  • MearBMearB member
    First Comment 5 Love Its
    My fiance is helping me out with the wedding planning as well. I found it funny when we talked about china. He wants china dishes to entertain guests and I come from a family were we didn't entertain with fancy dishware. So we go back and forth on adding china to the registry. Hopefully you guys can sit down and talk cause relationship, along with marriage, is about compromise. My compromise was I would let him pick the china and put it on the registry but if we don't get a matching whole set then REFUND!
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  • christin83christin83 member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    thank you for all the advice! our original compromise was that since he is getting the church and the religious ceremony that i never wanted that i got to pick out the reception venue....but it felt more like i kinda gave in cuz i'm not really thrilled about the venue.  he just wants to give me all that i want (which is sweet) but i do wanna have a honeymoon, a house....a marriage....after this ONE day is over =p  it is cute that he wants to be so involved and is excited but i told him it kinda feels like a little over involvement...ive been dreaming about this day for friggen ever and he's been thinking about it since he proposed! ugh...frustrations!
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  • AnaelseaAnaelsea member
    5 Love Its First Comment First Anniversary
    wow, maybe just let him do the planning? Is he paying? LOL? 
    I would get two lists, one for each of you, and write Must Have, Want have, and Dont Mind, and then write whats most important to you: of reception meal, reception decor, flowers, colors, music, flavors, ceremony music, style, games etc, have you both sit down and write out what you want, whats most important to you- OR each circle three things that you WONT Budge on, then trade lists and talk about what youre going to do instead of handling just the flowers then just the reception space and having him decide in the end, it needs to be a mutual agreement. Its alot harder to deal with things one at a time, and if he wants to rent centerpieces instead of use yours that means he doesnt like yours and he should just say so instead of blaming his family or whatnot.
    Ours were:
    Me: Live Musicians at Ceremony, Victorian Venue, Hot Springs
    Him: Open Bar, Open Bar, and Me(the bride- he wrote my name)
    albeit mine has no say about colors or flowers because he doesnt care- LOL- good luck, and remember it goes by so fast, dont fight over tiny details
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  • hyechica81hyechica81 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment First Answer
    you hate the venue but does he like the alternative venue bring everything with you nothing included?

    what about if you went online and found  a venue that included everything but was less expensive than the venue you hate.



    i have put most of the deposit down flowers, limo, dress, he put down a deposit on the venue but we need to put an additonal deposit next month plus we are seeing the photo guy this friday so i said to him you need to come up with this deposit
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