Bridal Shower- What to register for?

manateehugger · December 2013

Girls, my BMs are throwing me a shower in a couple of months. So I need to think about registering. This might be a dumb question, but what kinds of items do you put on a bridal shower registry? And what is the difference between what you register for for your shower and for the actual wedding? We are doing a honeymoon registry for the actual wedding as well so I'm a bit confused what to put for the bridal registry, but my mother has said it's more so things for me, but I'm still unsure exactly what to put.

1. You usually just register at 2 to 3 stores for the whole shebang, but you might need to review your registries after your shower and add a few more items.

2. Well what household things do you need? That's what you register for. China, everyday dishes, serving ware, flatware, small decor, small appliances, kitchen gadgets, bar ware, etc. Click Here for a good list to get you going----> http://forums.theknot.com/discussion /281669/ultimate-wedding-registry-checklist#latest

3. DO NOT do a honeymoon registry. They are asking for cash (which everyone knows is a good gift anyway), are deceitful, and beyond tacky. You are telling guests they are purchasing you a couples massage, when really they are simply paying a company that will later cut you a check. Seriously. If you want spending money, do a small registry for your shower and then don't add items afterward. Guests get the hint. If you look a few more posts down, you'll get a better explanation for why honeymoon registries are considered very poor form. Do yourself a favor and delete that thing asap.

ohmrs2014 · December 2013

I registered at 2 stores for everything because FI and I are moving in together right before the wedding so we need everything. You usually put things like china, flatware, kitchen gadgets, and such on a registry. The link provided is a great one and plus when you go to a store, they give you a huge checklist to work off of.

And I agree with @PDKH, do not do a honeymoon registry for all the reasons that were listed.

Noratel14 · December 2013

chibiyui · December 2013

Noratel14 said:
We ended up doing a honeymoon registry because we already have everything we need. We live together and when I moved in, I had things too so we have A LOT of double of things. We literally couldn't think of anything to put on a registry when we thought about it. We will be selling our house in about a year so we will buy some new furniture and some decor, but that's pretty much it. And it's hard to get those type of things now since we don't know what our new home will look like, the space, etc. Our family seems to be perfectly fine with the honeymoon registry. They just encouraged us to do a regular bridal shower registry though.

"Encouraging" you to do a traditional regular registry is the polite way of saying "please don't do that tacky ass honeymoon registry"

Noratel14 · December 2013

Noratel14 · December 2013

Noratel14 · December 2013

manateehugger · December 2013

Why did you delete your post? I gave you solid advice and a well-considered answer. Don't post if you don't want advice.

You can always register for upgrades. I refuse to believe that couples who "already have everything" couldn't manage to register for new guest towels, another set of sheets, or an upgraded food processor.

Make a small registry for your shower and then don't add anything else to it after the shower. Guests will realize that you don't need a whole lot of things and probably hand you gift cards and checks. You don't have to deceive them into handing over money with a honeymoon registry.

Noratel14 · December 2013

It wasn't necessarily your advice. Everyone does have their own opinion and yes true we could do a small registry instead, so I do appreciate that. I more so got annoyed with some other people's responses because no matter what I posted as a reason behind a honeymoon registry, it didn't matter and I don't need to defend my reasoning because it is my wedding and not theirs so they don't need to be so rude. I simply wanted the question answered of what the difference is between a bridal shower registry and wedding registry because I've heard their a bit different than one another. To not even have that question answered properly by others and instead be bashed was a bit ridiculous.

photokitty · December 2013

I have never heard of a shower registry being different from a bridal registry. They are always one in the same. You don't register for each event, rather people choose items from the same registry for the different events.

Regardless of not wanting opinions on your honeymoon registry you will get them bc this is a public forum. Honeymoon registries are tacky and rude. If You want cash just don't register. People know cash is an appreciated present without you telling them and having a company charge them fees on thier cash present. You are correct You don't have defend your reading, it is your wedding, but that doesn't make what you are doing polite or proper. Telling you that honeymoon registries are rude is not rude,its just the truth. Sorry. GL!

Noratel14 said:
It wasn't necessarily your advice. Everyone does have their own opinion and yes true we could do a small registry instead, so I do appreciate that. I more so got annoyed with some other people's responses because no matter what I posted as a reason behind a honeymoon registry, it didn't matter and I don't need to defend my reasoning because it is my wedding and not theirs so they don't need to be so rude. I simply wanted the question answered of what the difference is between a bridal shower registry and wedding registry because I've heard their a bit different than one another. To not even have that question answered properly by others and instead be bashed was a bit ridiculous.

MobKaz · December 2013

photokitty said:

I have never heard of a shower registry being different from a bridal registry. They are always one in the same. You don't register for each event, rather people choose items from the same registry for the different events. Regardless of not wanting opinions on your honeymoon registry you will get them bc this is a public forum. Honeymoon registries are tacky and rude. If You want cash just don't register. People know cash is an appreciated present without you telling them and having a company charge them fees on thier cash present. You are correct You don't have defend your reading, it is your wedding, but that doesn't make what you are doing polite or proper. Telling you that honeymoon registries are rude is not rude,its just the truth. Sorry. GL!
It wasn't necessarily your advice. Everyone does have their own opinion and yes true we could do a small registry instead, so I do appreciate that. I more so got annoyed with some other people's responses because no matter what I posted as a reason behind a honeymoon registry, it didn't matter and I don't need to defend my reasoning because it is my wedding and not theirs so they don't need to be so rude. I simply wanted the question answered of what the difference is between a bridal shower registry and wedding registry because I've heard their a bit different than one another. To not even have that question answered properly by others and instead be bashed was a bit ridiculous.

I agree with this. However, a former "regular" poster used to differentiate the two showers. I am not sure whether it was a regional difference. (If I recall, she was from Texas.) She would insist that a wedding shower was the traditional "household" gifting shower, whereas a bridal shower was bride specific in gifts, such as lingerie. In this case, the registry items were absolutely different in nature.

photokitty · December 2013

mobkaz said:

photokitty said:

I have never heard of a shower registry being different from a bridal registry. They are always one in the same. You don't register for each event, rather people choose items from the same registry for the different events.

Regardless of not wanting opinions on your honeymoon registry you will get them bc this is a public forum. Honeymoon registries are tacky and rude. If You want cash just don't register. People know cash is an appreciated present without you telling them and having a company charge them fees on thier cash present. You are correct You don't have defend your reading, it is your wedding, but that doesn't make what you are doing polite or proper. Telling you that honeymoon registries are rude is not rude,its just the truth. Sorry. GL!
It wasn't necessarily your advice. Everyone does have their own opinion and yes true we could do a small registry instead, so I do appreciate that. I more so got annoyed with some other people's responses because no matter what I posted as a reason behind a honeymoon registry, it didn't matter and I don't need to defend my reasoning because it is my wedding and not theirs so they don't need to be so rude. I simply wanted the question answered of what the difference is between a bridal shower registry and wedding registry because I've heard their a bit different than one another. To not even have that question answered properly by others and instead be bashed was a bit ridiculous.

I agree with this. However, a former "regular" poster used to differentiate the two showers. I am not sure whether it was a regional difference. (If I recall, she was from Texas.) She would insist that a wedding shower was the traditional "household" gifting shower, whereas a bridal shower was bride specific in gifts, such as lingerie. In this case, the registry items were absolutely different in nature.

---------------------------------------------
Since op is asking about a bridal shower registry and what to register for "the actual wedding" I'm not sure that's the case. I think she wants to know what she should ask for since she only wants money and someone told her she needed a registry besides the honeymoon registry if she wants her bm to throw her a shower...just my guess tho...

MobKaz · December 2013

photokitty said:

photokitty said:

I have never heard of a shower registry being different from a bridal registry. They are always one in the same. You don't register for each event, rather people choose items from the same registry for the different events. Regardless of not wanting opinions on your honeymoon registry you will get them bc this is a public forum. Honeymoon registries are tacky and rude. If You want cash just don't register. People know cash is an appreciated present without you telling them and having a company charge them fees on thier cash present. You are correct You don't have defend your reading, it is your wedding, but that doesn't make what you are doing polite or proper. Telling you that honeymoon registries are rude is not rude,its just the truth. Sorry. GL!
It wasn't necessarily your advice. Everyone does have their own opinion and yes true we could do a small registry instead, so I do appreciate that. I more so got annoyed with some other people's responses because no matter what I posted as a reason behind a honeymoon registry, it didn't matter and I don't need to defend my reasoning because it is my wedding and not theirs so they don't need to be so rude. I simply wanted the question answered of what the difference is between a bridal shower registry and wedding registry because I've heard their a bit different than one another. To not even have that question answered properly by others and instead be bashed was a bit ridiculous.

I agree with this. However, a former "regular" poster used to differentiate the two showers. I am not sure whether it was a regional difference. (If I recall, she was from Texas.) She would insist that a wedding shower was the traditional "household" gifting shower, whereas a bridal shower was bride specific in gifts, such as lingerie. In this case, the registry items were absolutely different in nature.
--------------------------------------------- Since op is asking about a bridal shower registry and what to register for "the actual wedding" I'm not sure that's the case. I think she wants to know what she should ask for since she only wants money and someone told her she needed a registry besides the honeymoon registry if she wants her bm to throw her a shower...just my guess tho...

I see your point. I interpreted this.........I'm a bit confused what to put for the bridal registry, but my mother has said it's more so things for me, but I'm still unsure exactly what to put.........to mean that the OP should be registering for personal things for herself versus a household. It is hardly the most clear post to decipher. Hopefully OP will return again to clarify.

photokitty · December 2013

mobkaz said:

photokitty said:

photokitty said:

I have never heard of a shower registry being different from a bridal registry. They are always one in the same. You don't register for each event, rather people choose items from the same registry for the different events. Regardless of not wanting opinions on your honeymoon registry you will get them bc this is a public forum. Honeymoon registries are tacky and rude. If You want cash just don't register. People know cash is an appreciated present without you telling them and having a company charge them fees on thier cash present. You are correct You don't have defend your reading, it is your wedding, but that doesn't make what you are doing polite or proper. Telling you that honeymoon registries are rude is not rude,its just the truth. Sorry. GL!
It wasn't necessarily your advice. Everyone does have their own opinion and yes true we could do a small registry instead, so I do appreciate that. I more so got annoyed with some other people's responses because no matter what I posted as a reason behind a honeymoon registry, it didn't matter and I don't need to defend my reasoning because it is my wedding and not theirs so they don't need to be so rude. I simply wanted the question answered of what the difference is between a bridal shower registry and wedding registry because I've heard their a bit different than one another. To not even have that question answered properly by others and instead be bashed was a bit ridiculous.

I agree with this. However, a former "regular" poster used to differentiate the two showers. I am not sure whether it was a regional difference. (If I recall, she was from Texas.) She would insist that a wedding shower was the traditional "household" gifting shower, whereas a bridal shower was bride specific in gifts, such as lingerie. In this case, the registry items were absolutely different in nature.
--------------------------------------------- Since op is asking about a bridal shower registry and what to register for "the actual wedding" I'm not sure that's the case. I think she wants to know what she should ask for since she only wants money and someone told her she needed a registry besides the honeymoon registry if she wants her bm to throw her a shower...just my guess tho...

I see your point. I interpreted this.........I'm a bit confused what to put for the bridal registry, but my mother has said it's more so things for me, but I'm still unsure exactly what to put.........to mean that the OP should be registering for personal things for herself versus a household. It is hardly the most clear post to decipher. Hopefully OP will return again to clarify.

True, I guess OP should just ask the BMs what type of shower they are throwing if that's the case. I've never heard of the 2 different types.

I have heard of people registering for the bachelortte party - which I think it tacky as heck! I'll buy you a drink and maybe some embarrassing junk. But not a teddy from VS!

I would be horrified to have a personal items shower, but that's just me.

hoffse · December 2013

Traditionally a bridal shower was for the bride - this was the polite way of indicating things like lingerie, lotions, fancy robes, spa certificates, etc. were appropriate. The idea was you implied it without using the word "lingerie" on an invitation - because that might give grandma a heart attack.

A wedding shower was considered to be a shower for household items that both the bride and groom could appreciate.

These days the terms are used interchangeably, and usually the lingerie shower is called a lingerie shower. Most "bridal," "wedding," or "traditional" showers are intended to indicate household goods these days.

And as always, I agree that the honeymoon registry is tacky.

misssunshine17 · December 2013

Don't register if you don't need things for your home. Don't make people waste money on shit you don't need.

RebeccaB88 · December 2013

You can do just one registry for both shower and wedding. That's how it's normally done. If your towels are old, pick out new ones. If one of you doesn't like your sheets or they're old, pick new ones. Keep in mind that those things will wear out in time. Choose a flatware, glassware, and dish pattern that you both like (you don't need to do formal china and silver). Find some good quality cookware that will last you a long time. Choose a few fun things that you might not buy for yourself - an ice cream maker, a grill, candlesticks, a pretty vase. Do you want to have family over for holidays? Some nice serving pieces - a big platter, serving bowls, a bread basket, chafing dish, chip and dip set. Upgrade within your guests budgets and according to what you use - a crockpot with a timer, a drink blender, good cake pans, a heavy stockpot. If your outdoorsy people, you can register with REI for camping or sports gear that you both would use. Anything you upgrade or get new of, you can donate your old stuff to charity where someone will be thrilled and blessed with it.

RebeccaB88 · December 2013

double post

tabathafaye · December 2013

If you don't need anything, then you don't need a shower.

misshart00 · December 2013

Where I'm from, a wedding shower and bridal shower are interchangeable. A "personal shower" is for lingerie, etc.
But I agree, if you don't need anything, then you don't need a shower. And you deleted all your posts, so I couldn't see a good reason for your honeymoon registry.

lovesclimbing · December 2013

What I'm used to is a bridal shower is for household stuff while a bachelorette party is where you get the lingerie and stuff. I would never ever register for lingerie though. And my little sister didn't have a bachelorette so a couple of us (my sister and I) gave her lingerie at her regular bridal shower.

A bridal shower registry and a wedding registry are the same thing. I got stuff off the wedding registry at my showers.

And I agree with the previous posters that a honeymoon registry is not a good idea.

kgd7357 · December 2013

People attending your shower will either just get something off the bridal registry or they will get you something personal. If I go to a good friend's shower, I like to get them their favorite perfume. If I go to a relatives shower, I get something ~$50 off the bridal registry. My shower gift is usually a lot small than my wedding gift, so if you do a shower it's good to put lower ticket items on there.

JoanE2012 · December 2013

Noratel14 said:

It wasn't necessarily your advice. Everyone does have their own opinion and yes true we could do a small registry instead, so I do appreciate that. I more so got annoyed with some other people's responses because no matter what I posted as a reason behind a honeymoon registry, it didn't matter and I don't need to defend my reasoning because it is my wedding and not theirs so they don't need to be so rude. I simply wanted the question answered of what the difference is between a bridal shower registry and wedding registry because I've heard their a bit different than one another. To not even have that question answered properly by others and instead be bashed was a bit ridiculous.

Deleting posts because people don't agree with you? Very mature!

Bridal Shower- What to register for?

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