Wedding Party

So I'm not a bridesmaid

So I know this is going to sound really dumb, but I just need to vent and I get it out. I'm a bit hurt because one of my closest friends since elementary school didn't ask me to be a bridesmaid. Though she couldn't attend my wedding, I had asked her to a be bridesmaid at my wedding. And even when she couldn't attend and sent her blessings, I sent her a gift anyway and thanked her for being a great friend and best far-away bridesmaid I could ask for. She was really grateful for the gift and the kind words. 

When she got engaged, I was one of the first people she called. I helped her pick her wedding gown, took her to bridal shows, and even gave her advice on etiquette. We even had a conversation about her picking bridesmaids and how this girl we were both acquaintances with expressed interest in being a bridesmaid even though they hardly ever talk. We also had a conversation about how hurt she was when her other close friends didn't ask her to be a bridesmaid and how it hurt her because it really forces you to analyze her relationships. I comforted her by telling her that some people pick bridesmaids for different reasons and it doesn't mean that they aren't still friends. 

That's why I feel so dumb now that she is getting married and she never asked me to be her bridesmaid. One of the main reasons is because she asked the same girl that only talks to her when convenient to be a bridesmaid. She also complains about this girl to me all the time. The second reason it hurts me so much is because of the value she puts on having close friends in your bridal party. I haven't been in a close friend's bridal party before and was fine about it, but knowing how important close friendships and bridesmaids are to her based on previous conversations, it really hurts because it seems that maybe we're not as close as I thought we were. 

Anyway, I just wanted to get this sentiment out here since I know I can never say anything to my friend about it and just be happy for her. Thanks for reading. Hope you all have a great new year. 
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Re: So I'm not a bridesmaid

  • That sucks. I understand being disappointed. My brother was in my wedding and I'm not in his and it definitely stings. Based on what you're saying about previous conversations, it does sound like maybe you're not as close as you thought you were and I would guess that makes you even more sad than not being a bridesmaid. 

    Good for you for not throwing a tantrum! 

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