Wedding Party

How to include 13yo niece

My fiancé has two nieces, one will be 4, the other will be 13. The 4 year old is going to be our flower girl, but idk how to include the 13yo. I feel as if asking her to be a flower girl as well could be awkward for her because she'll feel too old. I really want to involve her, but I already have all my bridesmaids whose ages range from 22-26. I want to have her help pass out the bubbles after the ceremony and help with the guest book and such but idk what kind of a title to give her. Please help!

Re: How to include 13yo niece

  • Passing out bubbles or helping with the guest book are crap jobs that no one wants to do. Really the only way to involve her in the wedding, other than as a BM or flower girl, is to have her do a reading. But you could just allow her to attend as a guest because that is an honor too.


  • Would it be weird to have her walk down with her sister as a flower girl? Obviously not with a basket of petals, but maybe with her own bouquet and just help her sister make it all the way down? And I love the idea of having her do a reading, I hadn't thought of that!
  • You could ask her if she wants to help her sister. Please don't have her "help" with the guest book. Nobody wants to do that, and nobody needs help signing a guest book. Passing out bubbles.....meh....could go either way. We had a 7-year-old who ASKED if he could do that, so sure, we let him. 


    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • Have her as a bridesmaid or a reader.

    But don't ask her to help with the guest book or pass out bubbles.
  • jessirayjessiray member
    First Comment 5 Love Its First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited January 2014
    You could add her in as jr. bridesmaid. When I was 10 or so I was the jr. bridesmaid in my aunt's wedding, and I loved it! I wore what the bridesmaids wore (just of course on a tinier size. They were pretty conservative to begin with, so there was no need to make it more appropriate for a younger girl). Don't make her a guestbook attendant. My sister had two girls she tutors be "guestbook attendants" and they did not do their "job". It was not a good thing...
  • jessiray said:
    You could add her in as jr. bridesmaid. When I was 10 or so I was the jr. bridesmaid in my aunt's wedding, and I loved it! I wore what the bridesmaids wore (just of course on a tinier size. They were pretty conservative to begin with, so there was no need to make it more appropriate for a younger girl). Don't make her a guestbook attendant. My sister had two girls she tutors be "guestbook attendants" and they did not do their "job". It was not a good thing...
    Kids tend not to like to be called "junior" - especially if their role is the same as an adult's.

    While a minor can't drink or go into certain places, the role of "bridesmaid" tends to be the same whether one is 10 or 30.  Just call anyone who is a bridesmaid a "bridesmaid" (and the same with groomsmen).
  • jessiray said:
    You could add her in as jr. bridesmaid. When I was 10 or so I was the jr. bridesmaid in my aunt's wedding, and I loved it! I wore what the bridesmaids wore (just of course on a tinier size. They were pretty conservative to begin with, so there was no need to make it more appropriate for a younger girl). Don't make her a guestbook attendant. My sister had two girls she tutors be "guestbook attendants" and they did not do their "job". It was not a good thing...
    Jeez, can you blame them? They were asked to do a crap "job" and they weren't even paid for it. And honestly, how stupid were your sister's guests that they couldn't figure out how to sign a guestbook and needed the expert tutelage of two young girls to help them figure it out?
  • jessiray said:
    You could add her in as jr. bridesmaid. When I was 10 or so I was the jr. bridesmaid in my aunt's wedding, and I loved it! I wore what the bridesmaids wore (just of course on a tinier size. They were pretty conservative to begin with, so there was no need to make it more appropriate for a younger girl). Don't make her a guestbook attendant. My sister had two girls she tutors be "guestbook attendants" and they did not do their "job". It was not a good thing...
    She says she already has enough bridesmaids. A "junior" (gag) bridesmaid is still a bridesmaid. It was lame of your sister to even HAVE guestbook attendants. And what, exactly, were they supposed to do? Stand there and say "Please sign the guest book"?  I'm curious what they DID do instead of their "job." 

    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
    image
  • A reading is probably the best way to have her in the ceremony if you don't want her to be a BM.
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