Want to have a Potluck reception?!

PolarBearFitz · January 2014

Don't. It's rude to ask your guests to provide food for your event. Please take care of your guests properly by providing the food yourself by managing your budget properly and not being selfish.

'Find out how much money you can spend per guest on food at the reception, and use that amount to determine the number of guests you can invite. After all, the head count at your reception is the biggest expense in your wedding budget. Establish your budget, and stick to it.'

Do not invite a ton of guests you cannot afford to feed and do not splurge for a designer dress and then expect your guests to feed each other. A potluck wedding reception is completely rude. Don't do it.

*Added note: Your reception is a thank you to your guests not a party just for you.

Inkdancer · January 2014

PolarBearFitz · January 2014

@Inkdancer I cannot see your image

Inkdancer · January 2014

Oh no! :C

It is a cat in a Pope hat and it says "Bless this post"

climbingsingle · January 2014

Not to mention, potlucks are the worst when you have dietary restrictions (i.e. - FI is allergic to mangoes, my MOH is allergic to shellfish, I have a wheat allergy). How do you know what Aunt Susie put in that pasta salad? Or how long has that chicken dish been sitting out? Has the food gone bad? What if someone gets sick? I imagine most potlucks are just dishes sitting out with no kind of temperature control.

rajahmd · January 2014

Ugg. One of my many cousins had a potluck wedding. Since we were coming from out of state, they specifically requested that we bring a cooler with ice and sodas. We weren't happy about it, but we went. When we got there, it was horrible. The appetizer line had chips and dip, bagel bites, and all sorts of other messy finger food you don't wanna eat while dressed up. The entrée line had about 5 or 6 giant pots of baked beans, fried chicken, and again other various informal foods. This was a relatively dressy wedding, in a hotel. We got really annoyed when we walked into the room and saw that they had a 2 tier wedding cake with at least two other non - connected cakes. Oh, and the favors were expensive chocolate lollipops. Even as a teenager I judged being asked to bring food and drinks to a wedding where they splurged on multiple cakes and fancy favors.

MobKaz · January 2014

But.....my guests will show their love for me in this way. And, they will feel honored to do this. And I will appoint a special friend, who is not special enough to be a bridesmaid, who will have the job of organizing the side dishes as guests bring them in to the reception. And she will feel special and honored to do it.

And I have suggested, with a clever and cute little poem, how they can bring their side dish in a dish, pan, or vessel that can be doubled as a gift to me as well. I am bending over backwards to be helpful, see?

My invitations to the special people I've honored to be on my clean up crew are totes adorbs! You can see all my wedding plans and ideas on my Pinterest board titled, "Totally Tasteless and Tacky", with the subtitle, "It's All About Me".

kmmssg · January 2014

It is sooo easy to avoid this.

Determin these 3 things in order:

1. What is my budget?

2. Who is on my guest list:

3. At what venue can I properly host the number of people I have on my guest list? Sign a contract with said venue and never ever ever ever have a potluck reception.

rajahmd · January 2014

mobkaz said:
But.....my guests will show their love for me in this way. And, they will feel honored to do this. And I will appoint a special friend, who is not special enough to be a bridesmaid, who will have the job of organizing the side dishes as guests bring them in to the reception. And she will feel special and honored to do it.

And I have suggested, with a clever and cute little poem, how they can bring their side dish in a dish, pan, or vessel that can be doubled as a gift to me as well. I am bending over backwards to be helpful, see?

My invitations to the special people I've honored to be on my clean up crew are totes adorbs! You can see all my wedding plans and ideas on my Pinterest board titled, "Totally Tasteless and Tacky", with the subtitle, "It's All About Me".

I ♡ you!

Amyzen83 · January 2014

I didn't know they were rude before coming to TK, and I think it's because I've heard people doing them. I definitely thought they were tacky! I'd never do one especially when some people are known for cat hair making their way into their dishes! Gross!

firebabe6519 · January 2014

@Amyzen83 I shudder at the thought! Bleh!

There are so many easier ways to feed your guests. FI and I are going to have about 75 people at our wedding and we have food prepared for 125 and it still isn't going to cost us more than $500 for full entree with an appetizer and dessert. It may not be steak and lobster, but it works. We have FI's favorite dish from a local mom n pop shop plus a vegan option for our guests so inclined.

Aside from cultural practices there are always other options to choose from than adding more to your guests plate.

PolarBearFitz · January 2014

mobkaz said:

But.....my guests will show their love for me in this way. And, they will feel honored to do this. And I will appoint a special friend, who is not special enough to be a bridesmaid, who will have the job of organizing the side dishes as guests bring them in to the reception. And she will feel special and honored to do it.

And I have suggested, with a clever and cute little poem, how they can bring their side dish in a dish, pan, or vessel that can be doubled as a gift to me as well. I am bending over backwards to be helpful, see?

My invitations to the special people I've honored to be on my clean up crew are totes adorbs! You can see all my wedding plans and ideas on my Pinterest board titled, "Totally Tasteless and Tacky", with the subtitle, "It's All About Me".

Don't forget to assign a friend to cut and hand out your cake at your reception. Only special non-bridesmaid friends get to be assigned this job. You want them to feel included!

RebeccaB88 · January 2014

And yes, we know none of your friends and family would do anything to make people sick. They wouldn't *intentionally* do that. However, shit happens. My cousin is a sweet but sometimes clueless girl who accidentally gave 40 people food poisoning at her daughter's first birthday party via a pasta salad with vinaigrette. Who knew that pasta isn't safe to be above a certain temperature, even when vinegar is involved? (The problem was the pasta itself, not the dressing.) She felt horrible, but honestly didn't know. There's a lot of food safety rules that nobody knows unless they've worked in foodservice. ETA: food poisoning can be very dangerous. This happened almost 7 years ago, and my mom passed out in the bathroom from throwing up, fractured her hip, and is still dealing with the orthopedic effects of that to this day. All from something unintentional.

RebeccaB88 · January 2014

DP

MobKaz · January 2014

aefitz29 said:

mobkaz said:

But.....my guests will show their love for me in this way. And, they will feel honored to do this. And I will appoint a special friend, who is not special enough to be a bridesmaid, who will have the job of organizing the side dishes as guests bring them in to the reception. And she will feel special and honored to do it.

And I have suggested, with a clever and cute little poem, how they can bring their side dish in a dish, pan, or vessel that can be doubled as a gift to me as well. I am bending over backwards to be helpful, see?

My invitations to the special people I've honored to be on my clean up crew are totes adorbs! You can see all my wedding plans and ideas on my Pinterest board titled, "Totally Tasteless and Tacky", with the subtitle, "It's All About Me".

Don't forget to assign a friend to cut and hand out your cake at your reception. Only special non-bridesmaid friends get to be assigned this job. You want them to feel included!

Oops....did I forget to mention that the cake is only for the bridal party? My bad. Feel free to bring a sweet for yourselves!

PolarBearFitz · January 2014

mobkaz said:

aefitz29 said:

mobkaz said:

But.....my guests will show their love for me in this way. And, they will feel honored to do this. And I will appoint a special friend, who is not special enough to be a bridesmaid, who will have the job of organizing the side dishes as guests bring them in to the reception. And she will feel special and honored to do it.

And I have suggested, with a clever and cute little poem, how they can bring their side dish in a dish, pan, or vessel that can be doubled as a gift to me as well. I am bending over backwards to be helpful, see?

My invitations to the special people I've honored to be on my clean up crew are totes adorbs! You can see all my wedding plans and ideas on my Pinterest board titled, "Totally Tasteless and Tacky", with the subtitle, "It's All About Me".

Don't forget to assign a friend to cut and hand out your cake at your reception. Only special non-bridesmaid friends get to be assigned this job. You want them to feel included!

Oops....did I forget to mention that the cake is only for the bridal party? My bad. Feel free to bring a sweet for yourselves!

NP I'll bring it with my flask since it's a cash bar you are having at this PPD. >_<

AddieCake · January 2014

You have to look at it like this: Would you call these people up (or include a note in the invitations) saying, "Hey, would you mind giving us $20 to help us pay for our reception?" Surely not. Asking them to bring food to it is pretty much the same thing.

buddysmom80 · January 2014

I don't really know why people would have a potluck wedding. My cousin's wedding was potluck, I got food poisoning and to this day, I will not eat food made by strangers (restaurants are okay). Hosts your guests accordingly.

MrsDeRuyter87 · January 2014

AddieL73 said:

You have to look at it like this: Would you call these people up (or include a note in the invitations) saying, "Hey, would you mind giving us $20 to help us pay for our reception?" Surely not. Asking them to bring food to it is pretty much the same thing.

YES!!!!!!! THIS!!!!!!!

Belthil · January 2014

I dislike potlucks normally and as the scale grows so does my dislike of them. How do I know that the person preparing the food washed their hands before handling the food? Icky.

Also, if I liked them and actually went to a potluck wedding I would totally count the food I brought as my gift to the bride and groom, so if you're looking to save money while cashing in on a gift you'd be disappointed.

Lily9911 · January 2014

I was once invited to a first birthday party for a friends child. IN the invitation it noted "Please bring chairs, drinks and a meal of your choice to share with the other party guests."

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!?

Your guests are supplying everything for a party YOU wanna throw? **face palm**

Inkdancer · January 2014

Lily9911 said:

I was once invited to a first birthday party for a friends child. IN the invitation it noted "Please bring chairs, drinks and a meal of your choice to share with the other party guests."

Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat!?

Your guests are supplying everything for a party YOU wanna throw? **face palm**

!!!! No way!

I can understand asking people to bring a drink, or an extra lawn chair. But that's an or, definitely not and.

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