Wedding Etiquette Forum

BP Showers/parties for me

I have a great gaggle of gals in my BP/life in general who have talked about hosting showers/bachelorette, etc for me-which is so kind and lovely of them.

However, I work on Sundays, and I heard a Sunday date being tossed around for my shower. As I work solo on Sundays because no one else at my  job really can do that shift, I may not be able to get a day off. Additionally, as FI and I are saving for a honeymoon/other wedding expenses, losing a shift isn't really appealing to me-even if I could find someone to cover. I do have evenings and Saturdays off, FWIW.

Is there ANY polite way to let them know that Sundays aren't a great option for me? 2 of the 3 adult BMs work traditional schedules, and the other has a flex schedule she's in charge of. Maybe my mother could loop them in? I don't want to be rude, but I'd really hate to miss something they'd planned.

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Re: BP Showers/parties for me

  • Thank you! I'm probably worrying needlessly, as the original convo came up in November 2013 when we ordered their dresses, but everything feels so close now that I'm four months out!
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  • I basically think that the bride gets to control one thing during her shower/parties: the date. When one of them brings it up, just slide the comment in.
  • Yeah, they really need to coordinate with your schedule, because the bride actually has to be at her shower.  When I planned my sister's shower, there was like only 3 weekends we could do it, because of her schedule.
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  • They shouldn't be planning a shower without clearing the date with you. I wouldn't worry too much about it.

     

    Also, you say you're saving for your honeymoon/wedding - i hope you just said that so that we would know why you didn't want to lose a shift at work, and not because you are planning to ask for monetary gifts at your shower.  Just in case, do be advised that a bridal shower is an event intended to shower the bride with physical gifts - so make sure you have a physical gift registry made if you are having a shower.  Nothing is more awkward than attending a cash/honeymoon fund shower, since the main event at these parties is watching the bride open her gifts, and no one wants to watch anyone open up cards with money in them.

  • delujm0 said:

    They shouldn't be planning a shower without clearing the date with you. I wouldn't worry too much about it.

     

    Also, you say you're saving for your honeymoon/wedding - i hope you just said that so that we would know why you didn't want to lose a shift at work, and not because you are planning to ask for monetary gifts at your shower.  Just in case, do be advised that a bridal shower is an event intended to shower the bride with physical gifts - so make sure you have a physical gift registry made if you are having a shower.  Nothing is more awkward than attending a cash/honeymoon fund shower, since the main event at these parties is watching the bride open her gifts, and no one wants to watch anyone open up cards with money in them.

    #1) This.

    #2) So awkward. 

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