Be my cheap self on the registry or class it up a little?

jenna8984 · January 2014

So I'm an accountant and I have no problem calling myself cheap. I keep an excel spreadsheet of my credit card expenses and categorize them for cryin out loud. I've always been a bargain shopper my whole life, getting clothes on clearance or places like TJ Maxx/ Ross. I literally won't spend more than $20 on a shirt or $40 on pants. Don't get me wrong I'm not rocking Walmart clothes but I've gotten some $198 dress pants for $29 at TJ Maxx so I'm kind of anti-retail. I always get sticker shock when I see prices in places like Macy's.

So I'm wondering- should I put things on the registry that I would buy for myself or do I put things that are nicer/more expensive because it's my one chance to get high end items? I feel like $20 for one dinner plate is outrageous but I feel like most guests aren't cheap like me and don't see a problem buying these items. I've seen people gift Kitchenaide stand mixers ($300) at showers and that's something I would never splurge on for myself.

What do you think?

AprilH81 · January 2014

I get where you are coming from, but I think if you try to be your normal "cheap" self you will have trouble with your registry because most of the places you shop at have limited stock that rotates frequently.

Up front Macy's looks expensive, but they have frequent major sales and for those who have the Macy's credit card they get constant coupons for 20% off (usually 15% for home goods). Most people who shop at Macy's know to wait for a sale.

Bed Bath & Beyond doesn't have sales, but they do have 20% off a single item coupons that are mailed out all the time. Their non-coupon prices is usually around the same price as Macy's during a sale.

Crate & Barrel has nice items at a variety of price points (including some really inexpensive dishes that get great reviews).

Finally there is always the option of a Target or Walmart registry although those tend to get mixed reviews since their stock turns over frequently as well.

With your viewpoint of being cost effective I would fill your registries with QUALITY (but not necessarily expensive) items that will last you a long time. Also consider the "cost per use" for the more expensive items, that will help keep things in perspective.

If you can do it without feeling guilt go ahead and put a few spurge items (Kitchen Aid mixer, Keurig, etc.) on there and see what happens. No one will blink an eye for items like that.

majesty318 · January 2014

jenna8984 I could have written your post! My FI tells me I should go on Extreme Couponing, LOL.

But here is what I decided: as long as I have been living on my own, when I needed something for kitchen/ bath/ etc., I went to Target and bought the cheapest possible thing. Now, I think it would be nice to have higher quality things, and we plan to donate all the Target stuff to charity after our wedding. I am one of the last ones of my friends to get married and every single one of them registered for nice stuff. My turn now. And yours too

AprilH81 · January 2014

@majesty318 FI and I donated a bunch of stuff when he moved in and I am already going through the kitchen again and donating things that we will have duplicates of since I've already had my shower and wedding presents are starting to show up at the house.

My mom, sister and FMIL also bought from the registry for Christmas (with my full blessing and approval since that is all stuff I want) so I made room in the cabinets for those as well.

We've already made a few stops at donation centers and I'm happy the stuff I have will be going to help someone else out.

jenna8984 · January 2014

thanks ladies- great points!!

csuave · January 2014

I hear you since I too have spreadsheets

We were combining two established houses into one and only creating a small registry for my family shower. We picked Target and Bed Bath and Beyond. My first goal was to come up with the things that we could use. After I had that list I worked on what brands and quality to get.

For most items I looked for good quality but not necessarily the highest price. For example, we entertained the idea of getting a Dyson but after reading reviews decided on a Shark Navigator. The reviews indicated it was a great quality vacuum but also a couple hundred less than the Dyson...but overall much nicer than the vacuums it was replacing. I put it on the BBB registry since I expected someone would use a 20% coupon to get it. I also put the $350 Kitchen Aid mixer on BBB and the person that bought it used a coupon and there was a rebate both taking about $100 off the price. DH already had a couple Hotel Collection towels from Macy's. We found the Fieldcrest Luxury at Target that were a great price and quality. I can't tell the difference between the Macy's and Target towels. And then there is the $100 trashcan that I would have never bought myself but am so happy we got it as a gift because it is great.

There were some areas where I went "cheap" mainly because they weren't important enough for me to get the higher price and quality version. I have never been a person that notices much difference in sheet sets so the sheets we picked were not very expensive.

I recommend reading the reviews and investing in quality where you think you will use it. Don't worry about prices and don't be afraid to splurge because you will have guests that spend in a range including the higher end.

zizibet · January 2014

Remember though, that many higher end brands of home appliances, china, etc. are genuinely better quality. My KA mixer is 15 years old. Still works great-I bake a lot. In that 15 years, one of my friends has gone through 5 cheap mixers. Did she really save that much? I don't think so.
High quality dishes can often be oven, freezer, microwave and dishwasher safe. You cannot say that about the inexpensive stuff.

netskyblue2 · January 2014

I don't think anyone's going to side-eye you for having a few expensive (but quality) items on your registry. If your whole registry was filled with expensive things, that would be different...

You're probably not ever going to have another opportunity to "ask" for the more expensive things that you'd like.

And it's not unheard of for people to "go in together" on a gift - my two sisters and I have on multiple occasions all chipped in on a birthday gift for our mom, when we know she'd rather have a particular item that's more expensive.

At the very least, you may be able to get completion discounts if no one buys it off your registry and you want to use some of the money you received to buy it yourself.

clanager03 · January 2014

I am in the same boat as you I feel awful putting one dinner setting place for 40 dollars on my registry then asking for 8 of them! or 100 bucks for spoons and forks. My fiancé and I already have a house together we are young so we don't have high end stuff so what I did put on there was nice stuff that I wouldn't buy for myself like a dyson vacuum or a kitchen aid those kinds of things but the things I use everyday or really want I tried to find the cheapest price I even figured coupons in there to. I registered at bed bath and beyond target and kohl's so everywhere has everything I would like and all different prices from 5 dollars to 500 dollars so it gives everybody a different range of prices they can choose from.

chibiyui · January 2014

I recommend registering for "nice" stuff, just because it will last longer.

That said if you don't like something, dishes,cookwate,etc. Don't register for it. Wait until after the wedding and get them at places like Tj maxx and homegoods. a lot of my accent pieces and serving pieces came from those places and they're great.

hoffse · January 2014

Class it up.

I'm extremely - EXTREMELY - cheap also.

But I think most people go into purchasing a wedding gift with a price point in mind, and it's a PITA to string together 8 things that all sort of fit a theme, but not really, to make it look "good" enough. If I'm shopping from your BBB registry, I also want to be able to use a 20% off coupon (which only works on one item at a time, by the way) and have that coupon give me $20 off instead of $4 off because I have to buy you a bunch of stuff to hit my price point.

H and I typically spend around $100 on a wedding gift. So did most of my wedding guests, just based on my general impressions of the gifts we received. I do this because I think a wedding is an incredibly significant event in life. A lot of people feel this way too. So I will go to your registry and try to find the most efficient way to spend $100. Please don't make me buy you a can opener to hit my price point.

Another thing: people poo-poo things like china as being "too expensive" on these boards, but there are a lot of ways to get deals on it if you need to complete your set. I literally have a spreadsheet set up for my H so he can buy the remaining pieces of my crystal, silver, etc. for birthday or holiday gifts without paying more than I would pay... I tell him where to look and a maximum dollar limit I would be willing to spend, which is normally less than half retail. And my H has found some spectacular deals on it. I'm talking, $20 for a new, extra place setting of my china (we actually received all of our china - including the $300 coffee pot - but I decided later I wanted an extra place setting in case of breakage). My china retails for $140 per place setting. So $20 was a hell of a deal. Ebay is an amazing place to buy china or crystal. So is replacements.com. As it turns out, we don't have a huge amount to complete because our wedding guests bought us most that stuff for us. It hits desired price points, it's something you "keep forever," and it feels more special than a can opener.

I promise you that your bargain hunters won't go over their designated budget for your wedding. And most of us will take advantage of the sales, coupons, etc. to get you something nice. But the point is, we want to get you something nice, not something cheap.

SandK14 · January 2014

I can relate- 75% of everything I own comes from a thrift store or clearance rack! So when I created my registry, I felt odd looking at all of these "full price" things and asking people to buy them for me! What I tried to do was find a balance, registering for smaller ticket items (like individual utensils, bowls and platters, etc), and splurges (Kitchenaid Mixer, etc). Plus, I registered at a high end retailer, and a lower end retailer, so everyone has an option for their budget. Good luck!

ElcaB · January 2014

Girl, we're two peas in a pod. My boss & I always laugh about how we practically never pay full price for an item. We are definitely Maxxinistas!

When it comes to registering, register for the things you want. As PPs suggested, it'd be near impossible to register at discounted retailers like TJM because of rotating stock. Remember, places like BBB and Kohls almost always have 15-20% discounts available. If a guest can't afford it, they won't buy it. Simple as that!

JoanE2012 · January 2014

jenna8984 said:

So I'm an accountant and I have no problem calling myself cheap. I keep an excel spreadsheet of my credit card expenses and categorize them for cryin out loud. I've always been a bargain shopper my whole life, getting clothes on clearance or places like TJ Maxx/ Ross. I literally won't spend more than $20 on a shirt or $40 on pants. Don't get me wrong I'm not rocking Walmart clothes but I've gotten some $198 dress pants for $29 at TJ Maxx so I'm kind of anti-retail. I always get sticker shock when I see prices in places like Macy's.
So I'm wondering- should I put things on the registry that I would buy for myself or do I put things that are nicer/more expensive because it's my one chance to get high end items? I feel like $20 for one dinner plate is outrageous but I feel like most guests aren't cheap like me and don't see a problem buying these items. I've seen people gift Kitchenaide stand mixers ($300) at showers and that's something I would never splurge on for myself.
What do you think?

Your other post says you're not having a shower. You said it's too gift grabby. So why are you registering?

http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1006999/bridal-showers-and-baby-showers-are-so-boring#latest

jenna8984 · January 2014

JoanE2012 said:

jenna8984 said:

So I'm an accountant and I have no problem calling myself cheap. I keep an excel spreadsheet of my credit card expenses and categorize them for cryin out loud. I've always been a bargain shopper my whole life, getting clothes on clearance or places like TJ Maxx/ Ross. I literally won't spend more than $20 on a shirt or $40 on pants. Don't get me wrong I'm not rocking Walmart clothes but I've gotten some $198 dress pants for $29 at TJ Maxx so I'm kind of anti-retail. I always get sticker shock when I see prices in places like Macy's.
So I'm wondering- should I put things on the registry that I would buy for myself or do I put things that are nicer/more expensive because it's my one chance to get high end items? I feel like $20 for one dinner plate is outrageous but I feel like most guests aren't cheap like me and don't see a problem buying these items. I've seen people gift Kitchenaide stand mixers ($300) at showers and that's something I would never splurge on for myself.
What do you think?

Your other post says you're not having a shower. You said it's too gift grabby. So why are you registering?

http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1006999/bridal-showers-and-baby-showers-are-so-boring#latest

I'm not having a shower but we are registering for some small things only because older guests (grandparents and aunts) prefer to give a physical gift and not cash. So we are just giving a few choices for them that's all, no shower

JoanE2012 · January 2014

jenna8984 said:

JoanE2012 said:

jenna8984 said:

So I'm an accountant and I have no problem calling myself cheap. I keep an excel spreadsheet of my credit card expenses and categorize them for cryin out loud. I've always been a bargain shopper my whole life, getting clothes on clearance or places like TJ Maxx/ Ross. I literally won't spend more than $20 on a shirt or $40 on pants. Don't get me wrong I'm not rocking Walmart clothes but I've gotten some $198 dress pants for $29 at TJ Maxx so I'm kind of anti-retail. I always get sticker shock when I see prices in places like Macy's.
So I'm wondering- should I put things on the registry that I would buy for myself or do I put things that are nicer/more expensive because it's my one chance to get high end items? I feel like $20 for one dinner plate is outrageous but I feel like most guests aren't cheap like me and don't see a problem buying these items. I've seen people gift Kitchenaide stand mixers ($300) at showers and that's something I would never splurge on for myself.
What do you think?

Your other post says you're not having a shower. You said it's too gift grabby. So why are you registering?

http://forums.theknot.com/discussion/1006999/bridal-showers-and-baby-showers-are-so-boring#latest

I'm not having a shower but we are registering for some small things only because older guests (grandparents and aunts) prefer to give a physical gift and not cash. So we are just giving a few choices for them that's all, no shower

Fair enough!

kannf1982 · January 2014

I think that people shouldn't go above and beyond their price range as in, registering for $150 place settings, if they themselves don't normally live like that (and if they themselves do not have family and friends who are wealthy). BUT even though you're cheap, you can still go with macy's, target, crate and barrel, etc. Those are very middle-class standard price ranges for decent items.

erinlin25 · January 2014

I'm right there with you girl! There were plenty of expensive things we just could not justify putting on the registry... I would hold back and say internally "if they want to buy me a $200 item I'd rather them give me $200 cash." I would not spend that much on something... BUT as in the wedding industry there are many people who want to purchase the nicer things and are happy to do it. This is a time you can make a wish list and not feel totally guilty about it. Especially since sometimes those bigger ticket items make a great group gift. Just as long as you have a good variety of price points no one is going to judge you for upgrading your list a bit from your everyday purchases. I did not register for the $300 mixer because I simply would not use it enough in everyday life to justify someone spending that on me as a gift. If I were into baking and thought I would use it a lot, I would have probably put it on there. Same with the Vitamix--my MIL was so mad we did not register for one. We said "we were very happy with blender system we selected, we do not need a $500 blender." But we were excited to put the $200 wine bar on there, and happy when we received it. We get to use/look at it daily and know it was money well spent.

Be my cheap self on the registry or class it up a little?

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