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Wedding Woes

Are non-profits always a hot mess of crappy people?

Dear Prudence,
I am a twentysomething who has been working for a nonprofit less than a year. In my very small department, there is a large disparity in age between myself and most of my colleagues, save for one. “Mary” has been working for the organization for five years and is considered a star. She’s just a few years older than I am. She is constantly praised for her helpfulness. Recently, I was given project work with her. Unfortunately it has not been the learning experience I had hoped for. Small oversights are treated as if I am lacking in general common sense. She rolls her eyes and speaks to me in a patronizing manner. Finally, she came over to my desk, asked me to open up one of the documents I had been working on, leaned over and proceeded to ask me condescending questions like, "When you look at this, does something look wrong?" She then made me play a game of "try and find the mistake." I was so upset by the tone and the manner in which she spoke to me, I had to fight back tears. I know I come off as rather meek, but I'm not sure if this is why she takes liberties with me. I have a lot of work left to do with her, and I'm dreading it. It reminds me of being bullied in high school. Am I being overly sensitive? Should I talk to my boss? Should I address the issue with her directly? If so, how?

—Intimidated

Re: Are non-profits always a hot mess of crappy people?

  • I have worked for two international non-profits and my experience was enough to write a couple books about -- too much corruptness, pride, and not enough accountability.  With that said, if you're seriously disturbed by her treatment, I suggest talking to someone in HR (not your boss). Also keep in mind though, if this experience with her is intended as a "learning one" - take it as such, finish it, and if offered another project with her, respectfully decline. 

    Word to the wise, after 3 years of junk I finally left the "industry" and have been happy ever since -- this goes for any job you do not find life in, life is too short to be miserable no matter the "cause."
  • I worked with an extremely efficient and reputable non-profit: nope, never encountered anything like this.  If they paid enough money to live comfortably where I live, I'd probably still be working for them.
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    "I'm not a rude bitch.  I'm ten rude bitches in a large coat."

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