Dress shopping big blow to self esteem!

Megan&KyleH · January 2014

I found my dream dress and I am very happy. However, after the seamstress took my measurements, they encouraged me to order the sample size I was wearing, which was a 12! I have never worn a 12 in my life. I am usually a 4-6. As I thought about it after my bridal appointment, it has made me increasingly nervous and self conscious. I have been working my butt off on the elliptical and in Zumba class and yet they make me order a 12? I know it will be taken in but it made me feel kind of crappy. It's like what am I killing myself working out for? I just want to look and feel perfect and confident on our big day. How do I get feeling better?

hikebikebemerry · January 2014

Megan&KyleH said:

I found my dream dress and I am very happy. However, after the seamstress took my measurements, they encouraged me to order the sample size I was wearing, which was a 12! I have never worn a 12 in my life. I am usually a 4-6. As I thought about it after my bridal appointment, it has made me increasingly nervous and self conscious. I have been working my butt off on the elliptical and in Zumba class and yet they make me order a 12? I know it will be taken in but it made me feel kind of crappy. It's like what am I killing myself working out for? I just want to look and feel perfect and confident on our big day. How do I get feeling better? Get a paper bag and breathe into it. Have you calmed down? Good. If you *can't* have a certain size, when you get the dress, cut the tags out. If you let this super minor detail be a big deal, you need to take a step back to work on priorities.

Really don't think about the size they ordered your dress in- bridal gown sizing is usually very different than street clothing.

Also, it's super fucking insulting to people who are a size 12 that you're THAT unhappy about it. Did you know that people live their lives perfectly happy, and a size 12?

FWIW, I give zero fucks what size my dress is, because I feel good in it.

QueerFemme · January 2014

Bridal sizing is often dramatically different than street clothes. You are stressing over something that has no impact on what size you really are.

I'm a 14 in street clothes. My gown was a size 20. Who cares what's on the label?

QueerFemme · January 2014

PS. I agree with hikebike that it's pretty offensive that you say "size 12" like it's the worst thing that could happen to you.

coronado11 · January 2014

Ditto this post was a big blow to my self esteem! JK im a 22 and my dress rocks on me.

AddieCake · January 2014

Wow. I'm a size 12, and I looked smoking hot in my dress.

hyechica81 · January 2014

omg bridal sizing is totally different than normal street clothes jeans and tees. the dresses run extremely small so unless you are shopping at Alfred Angelo or Davids bridal who's dresses more run true to street clothes size. you are going to need a larger size

i am between a 20-22 in bottoms and anywhere from a 18/20-22/24 in tops. my wedding dress i bought, the sample was a 22 that i tried on but did not fit quite right. i was measured 3 sizes larger than the sample but my waist and the sample were only 5 inch difference so my gown was ordered in a 26. it came in and fits like a glove except the bust has to be taken and the length hemmed, other than that the dress makes me look slimmer and amazing

think about it this way you insisted they order the 4 or the 6 the order the 6 but they warn you it might not fit at all and you were the one who insisted you sign off on it fully knowing its a huge risk. the size 6 comes in and it does not fit you at all you can get it up your hips but the top does not lay flush with your bust and it wont even come together to zip up or lace up. the structure of the dress will only allow 2 inches to be let out lets say its zip up they now have to order extra fabric and convert the dress to corset in order for it to fit you..

a good bridal salon knows what they are doing and will order according to your measurements and the size chart for that particular designer

hyechica81 · January 2014

heatheremanderson · January 2014

All of the OP are right. bridal dresses always run significantly larger than your street clothes.

A lot of dress designers also have very small seam allowances which is why a lot of seamstresses suggest to size up to allow room to have adjustments made.

manateehugger · January 2014

My dress size is 2 sizes above my street size. Also, you do realize (despite what stores would have you believe) your body is not a cookie cutter? Like most women, your hips, waist, and bust probably belong in totally different size ranges.

You need to relax here. It's just a number - it's not like the number says anything about how you look. Relax! This is a nonissue and you're sounding like a jerk for stressing about it so badly.

firebabe6519 · January 2014

Relax. Its not a big deal. I wear a size 2 and my wedding dress is a size 8. Different brands run different sizes, especially from normal clothes to wedding attire. All that matters is that you love the way you look in your dress. Who cares what the tag says...

speedyblazer11 · January 2014

Relax, the size on the tag doesn't matter if the dress fits. I had to go up 3 sizes when I bought my dress at David's. They have to order the dress for the "biggest" part of you, the rest can be fixed.

And I agree with some of the other posters on here, you just made being a size 12 in real life sound like the end of the world. Trust my size 10 (dress size 16) self it's awesome to be this size.

How do you feel better about yourself? Well I guess you could go get a gym member ship and eat kale until your wedding so that you will be your magic size 4. But me, I'll have a cookie and be happy with myself.

Stop worrying I'm sure you will be beautiful, size 4 or size 12.

smalfrie19 · January 2014

AddieL73 said:

Wow. I'm a size 12, and I looked smoking hot in my dress.

Here here!!! MY dress is a size 12...I don't think I have ever felt so insulted...guess 12 = fat ..now.... uggh

MollyandD · January 2014

I don't know what my dress size is. I ordered it with custom measurements and never learned the size. I assumed it was a 6, since that's my size, but really it doesn't matter. I'd rather get a size that's bigger than what I usually have so that everything fits correctly. No bride wants a dress too small, because then you WILL look bad. Forget the number. Remind yourself that bridal dresses size differently.

tammym1001 · January 2014

@meganandkyleh - What the other pp's said is definitely true about wedding dress sizes. They are almost always a couple of sizes bigger than your regular clothes. The salon probably should have told you that.

I just wanted to add, please don't let anybody tell you that you can't feel bad about a size on a dress. How you feel about your body is your own business and whether you are a size 2 or a size 20, it is possible to feel bad about your size. I'm sure you didn't mean to insult anyone. Just keep doing what you're doing with exercising and eating healthy. You will look great on your wedding day!

Maggie0829 · January 2014

The size does not matter. The only people that even need to know what size you order is yourself, the bridal shop and God (or whoever you may believe in).

My friend freaked out because the shop told her she had to order a 16. She was pissed so she ordered a 14 to make herself feel better. Guess what? The dress didn't fit and they had to rush to get her a new one.

Remember that dress sizes are based off model measurements where the models are size 0 stick figures. Now unless you want to look like a q-tip (which is not a good look) realize that the size means nothing. What matters is how you feel in the dress. If you think you look hot and awesome and amazing then a number on a tag means shit.

mimiphin · January 2014

I am fairly small and all bridal consultants freak out when I come in since I am pretty much a size 2-4 "OMG DON'T look at the Number!!!!!". What you need to remember is that bridal gowns are not made like the rest of the worlds clothes, some dresses fit me in a 2, others fit in an 8, some even in a 10-12.

If they recommend to get a 12, do it. No one looks at the number when you are wearing it, If you do order it in a 12 and it is too big you can always take it in, it is more difficult to let the dress out than take it in.

But what sucks for me is that my waist is 2 inches lower than the rest of the world's and most dresses don't fit me. I hate clothing shopping!

grumbledore · January 2014

Yeah you're being ridiculous. My dress is a bigger size than my normal clothes. No one but me and the shop that sold it to me knows that.

grumbledore · January 2014

Yeah you're being ridiculous. My dress is a bigger size than my normal clothes. No one but me and the shop that sold it to me knows that.

CrazyCatLady3 · January 2014

I'm a size 12 and I had to order my bridal gown in *gasp* a 16!!! And I work my butt off at the gym and am running a half marathon this weekend with my size 12 self.

princessleia22 · January 2014

Yeah, like others said, bridal sizes are completely different than street sizes. I wear size 6 in real life, but I measured between 10/12 for my bridal gown.

Honestly, I would think the wedding industry would want to do the opposite. You want women to feel perfect and beautiful on their wedding day, so I would think that if they were going to skew the numbers, they would want to make you feel good by putting you in a smaller size. I'm sure a lot of women would be more tempted to buy a dress that said they were 2 sizes smaller than one that says they are 2 sizes larger. But, that's just my thinking. It's kind of stupid either way... there really should be standardized sizes across the board regardless of type of clothing or design.

Dress shopping big blow to self esteem!

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