Walking the bride down the aisle.

devdalberts · January 2014

So, long story short, I don't talk to my dad, I don't have any grandparents, and my older brother is just...ugh. My mum is re-married, but I'm not really comfortable with my step-dad, and I'm not even sure they'll still be married when the big day comes. Is it normal for a bride to walk down the aisle herself, or should I ask my mum?

phira · January 2014

It's entirely your decision. It sounds like the two big options for you are either ask your mother to walk you down the aisle, or to walk yourself down the aisle. Another option, which I know isn't a really common one, especially among more traditional folks, is to enter with your partner (instead of walking down the aisle to them).

You should make the choice that you're the most comfortable with. You shouldn't feel pressured to pick a male relative just because That's How It's Done. And you shouldn't feel pressured to ask your mom if you'd rather walk alone.

I was going to walk alone, but my mother REALLY wants to walk me down the aisle, and my partner has actually told me he wants his parents to walk him down the aisle. When it was just me being walked down, I felt really irritated (like, why doesn't HE have to be escorted? Why doesn't HE have to be "given away?"). But with his parents walking him down, it feels much more like we're just honoring our parents, and acknowledging the families we came from as we officially become our own family. So maybe if it's not just YOU being escorted, but your partner being escorted by their parents as well, it might feel better to ask your mom.

Drewsgirl31 · January 2014

I've seen both and neither one seemed odd

whichever you prefer, but I bet your mom would love the honor

Blergbot · January 2014

You could have your mother walk you down the aisle, or just walk by yourself. Either way is perfectly acceptable.

OliveOilsMom · January 2014

Also, a few brides on here walked down with their best friend. But whoever you choose, the choice is yours alone!

emmyg65 · January 2014

As PP said, you can do whatever's right for you, and none of the options will look odd. My now-husband and I walked down the aisle together. We liked the symbolism of walking into our marriage side by side.

ei34 · January 2014

I've seen brides walk down the aisle solo and I've also seen the bride walking down with her mother. Both are terrific options- I'd go with whichever makes you more comfortable.

minskat30 · January 2014

I walked myself down the aisle and it was just fine once I locked eyes with H. Do what feels right for you.

JennyColada · January 2014

I've always imagined walking side by side with Fi. I can't imagine going on any important life journey without him!

mbross3 · January 2014

You should do whatever you like! If you like the idea of walking with someone down the aisle, you can choose anyone- it doesn't have to be a family member. One of my very good friends walked down the aisle with her best friend. My BF walked his step-neice down the aisle because they are very close. At a friend's wedding this winter, he walked down the aisle with his partner. Of course you can always strut your stuff on your own! That's the great thing about it being your wedding- you can do whatever you like!

phira · January 2014

Jennycolada said:

I've always imagined walking side by side with Fi. I can't imagine going on any important life journey without him!

I wanted to do this SO badly and my partner immediately said no

I hope you're able to do this so I can live vicariously!

Bubblegum5586 · January 2014

phira said:

It's entirely your decision. It sounds like the two big options for you are either ask your mother to walk you down the aisle, or to walk yourself down the aisle. Another option, which I know isn't a really common one, especially among more traditional folks, is to enter with your partner (instead of walking down the aisle to them).

You should make the choice that you're the most comfortable with. You shouldn't feel pressured to pick a male relative just because That's How It's Done. And you shouldn't feel pressured to ask your mom if you'd rather walk alone.

I was going to walk alone, but my mother REALLY wants to walk me down the aisle, and my partner has actually told me he wants his parents to walk him down the aisle. When it was just me being walked down, I felt really irritated (like, why doesn't HE have to be escorted? Why doesn't HE have to be "given away?"). But with his parents walking him down, it feels much more like we're just honoring our parents, and acknowledging the families we came from as we officially become our own family. So maybe if it's not just YOU being escorted, but your partner being escorted by their parents as well, it might feel better to ask your mom.

We both had both our parents escort us down (which is a Jewish tradition - we had various Jewish traditions but it was not a "Jewish wedding" as hubby is not Jewish). And once we were all together by the Chuppah we had a "parent's blessing" about their support of our marriage and becoming our own family vs me being "given away".

phira · January 2014

@bubblegum1309 Yeah, we're having a secular Jewish wedding, since I'm Jewish and my partner is not. Having both parents walk both people down the aisle (e.g. groom being walked down by his parents, bride being walked down by her parents) is one of the traditions that I don't really mind other people incorporating, even if they're not Jewish. It just seems like good sense to me!

Bubblegum5586 · January 2014

@phira - most of the Jewish traditions we had were because they are just nice traditions - Jewish or not!

JennyColada · January 2014

phira said:

Jennycolada said:

I've always imagined walking side by side with Fi. I can't imagine going on any important life journey without him!

I wanted to do this SO badly and my partner immediately said no

I hope you're able to do this so I can live vicariously!

Sometimes it weirds me out the wedding things we have I common.

phira · January 2014

@Jennycolada Maybe we're long lost twins.

jdluvr06 · January 2014

My best friend is walking me down the aisle. You can have whoever you want do it. I think it would be lovely if your mom does it. I asked my mom first but she said she just wanted to sit and watch.

HaileyDancingbear · January 2014

Don't worry about it. I know weddings seem lie they have to be a certain way, and that there are a million rules, but really a lot of it- like who walks you down the aisle- is entirely up to you. You can walk alone or have anyone you feel close to walk you down the aisle. Do whatever you want with little details like this, as long as you host your guests properly and are respectful towards them, your wedding will be fine and your guests will be happy.

wrigleyville · January 2014

I think of it more as being "escorted" rather than "given away", as the bride has a position of honor. (In that vein, I think it's nice when the groom is escorted too, since he also has a place of honor.)

I've seen brides escorted by their best male friend, a cousin, even a professor, and I think it's incredibly sweet.

Walking the bride down the aisle.

Re: Walking the bride down the aisle.

Choose Another Board

Search Boards