Dress code question

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

OK, y'all, this has stumped even me.

DH's brother and FI are getting married on V-Day at the MDJ. (MDJ = Courthouse wedding).

Ceremony is at 11.30 a.m.

Unclear what, if any, post-ceremony plans there are, or what they entail (other than we've been voluntold we're in charge of getting BSC grandma to and from the courthouse).

I know that we always say, "Judge the formality of an event by the formality of the invitation, the time of day, the location."

We got invited by text message. So someone tell me where that falls on the black tie/white tie/cocktail attire scale.

I'm tentatively planning to wear a nice pair of slacks and a nice sweater -- kind of like what I'd wear to church -- because the (10+ day) weather forecast says it's going to be cold, so I'd rather not wear a skirt, and having DH dress the same.

Thoughts? Am I in the right ballpark?

FWIW, DH had a massive struggle explaining to his brother that, no, jeans and your Dallas Cowboys jacket are NOT appropriate attire for a Catholic Mass, ESPECIALLY when you are a GM.

pumpkinsandturkeys · February 2014

Oh goodness.

Chances are, the bridal couple will be dressed more casually than desired. However, this is one of those rare situations in which you are permitted to be dressed more formally (and appropriately) than the bride and groom.

I think what you're planning to wear is perfectly acceptable. I would aim for dress casual -- like what you would wear to a Thanksgiving dinner with family, or similar event. Less formal than cocktail, but certainly more formal than jeans.

hlvonb · February 2014

@HisGirlFriday13

Last time I attended a court house wedding (it was in the winter) I wore some nice brown slacks and a nice sweater with nice boots that had maybe an inch heel.

I would have worn tan pants but that's what the bride and groom were wearing.

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

But if they're wearing jeans, should I wear jeans? I just...That doesn't feel right somehow.

pinkcow13 · February 2014

Your outfit sounds perfect. I would say business casual is perfectly fine for a winter courthouse wedding.

I went to a courthouse wedding (my first) when
My cousin got married like 7 or 8 years ago and I was definitely overdressed. I wore a little black dress with strappy (at least) 4 inch heels.

pumpkinsandturkeys · February 2014

HisGirlFriday13 said:

But if they're wearing jeans, should I wear jeans? I just...That doesn't feel right somehow.

I wouldn't feel right wearing jeans to a wedding, either, whether it's in a courthouse, church, on a beach or in a barn.

Everyone has different comfort levels, and expecting you to wear jeans and a t-shirt to their courthouse wedding would seem to be way out of your comfort zone, and rightfully so.

Besides, it's not as though you're showing up in an evening gown, dripping in diamonds (although that may be a couple of hops away from slacks and a sweater in their world, by the sounds of it). However, the real world supports you and your planned attire.

sarahufl · February 2014

Business casual is appropriate, IMO.

But really, a text? At least email....

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

DH will be relieved to know he's exempt from wearing a suit.

If it were summer, I could get away with wearing a cute sundress, and that covers a multitude of dress ranges.

pumpkinsandturkeys · February 2014

HisGirlFriday13 said:

DH will be relieved to know he's exempt from wearing a suit. If it were summer, I could get away with wearing a cute sundress, and that covers a multitude of dress ranges.

True. But then FSIL couldn't have the spectacular V-Day wedding she's been dreaming of for the last few weeks! Come on now, HisGirl -- you expect too much

climbingsingle · February 2014

I think you're spot on with what you're planning to wear.

RebeccaB88 · February 2014

I'd wear what you've planned. Especially considering the weather. I'd think people would be just fine with you dressing for warmth. If you're business casual, people will probably just think you came straight from work.

HisGirlFriday13 · February 2014

pumpkinsandturkeys said:

HisGirlFriday13 said:

DH will be relieved to know he's exempt from wearing a suit. If it were summer, I could get away with wearing a cute sundress, and that covers a multitude of dress ranges.

True. But then FSIL couldn't have the spectacular V-Day wedding she's been dreaming of for the last few weeks! Come on now, HisGirl -- you expect too much

You're right! I mean, three whole weeks of planning and a text invite. Who am I to interfere??

KeptInStitches · February 2014

I'd say slacks and a sweater are fine.

Cookie Pusher · February 2014

Yep, I've always done business casual to courthouse weddings. Although I'm a little surprised the special snowflakes didn't have a specific dress theme they wanted you to adhere to - maybe they just haven't gotten around to telling you.

Whatever you wear, you should incorporate red glitter, so it's extra Valentines-y!

jdluvr06 · February 2014

The last court house wedding I went to I wore jeans and a nice top. I would have worn something nicer but I literally got invited the day of. They called as they were headed to the courthouse and asked if we would be their witnesses. I think what you have in mind will be good.

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