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Bachelorette party questions?

afterimageafterimage member
First Comment First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
in Wedding Party
This is waaaaay in advance because I am getting married in Jan 2015, but I was thinking about it the other day and I was wondering if anyone here has some advice!  My MOH and BM's are already throwing some ideas out there.

My first question is when do you have a bachelorette party?  Is 2-3 weeks before the wedding okay?  I though late december might be a good time since many people get time off over the holidays, which is just a few weeks before my wedding.

My second question is: who should be invited?  One idea is to have a weekend trip away (rent a cabin or something) in which case, I feel like it would be best just to invite my closest friends.  If we do something more low-key - an event in town, I'd want to consider inviting more people, but I feel like it gets complicated then.  For example:  I would like to invite FI's cousin.  But if I invite her, do I have to invite his other female cousins who I don't know as well, or my own cousins who I'm just not really close with? 

Thanks in advance for any advice.  It's not a really pressing matter since it's still far away, I just feel a bit clueless.



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Re: Bachelorette party questions?

  • artbyallieartbyallie mod
    First Anniversary First Comment First Answer 5 Love Its
    Everyone invited to your b-party must also be invited to the wedding. Your MOH and bridesmaids should be determining their budget and deciding what they can afford to host. I dislike the trend of weekend trips for b-parties, since those get expensive real fast. My b-party was super low key, though, and didn't even involve going out.

    Overall, it's really way too soon to be thinking about this, for you or for your wedding party.
    image
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  • delujm0delujm0 member
    First Anniversary First Comment 5 Love Its Name Dropper

    2-3 weeks before the wedding is normally fne...however, i would be cautious of booking a destination bachelorette party over the holidays.  Many people have standing holiday plans with their families that they won't be able to skip.  If you wanted to just do a night out in town over the holidays, that would probably work better.

     

    How many people would be coming from out of town for the bachelorette?  if it's a lot, doing your B-party so close to the wedding might be an issue...people may not be able to afford to travel twice in such close proximity.  They also may not be able to travel aroun the holidays due to family commitments.

     

    I had a destination B-party in Disney World.  It was a trip that several of my girlfriends and I make almost annually anyway.  One of my BMs planned everything out, but we used my time share to save everyone the cost of lodging.  We just invited the BMs and a few other close friends who we knew would be interested.  We didn't want anyone to feel obligated to travel for it.  It was more like "I'd be taking this vacation anyway, do you want to come?"  I covered all of my own expenses for the trip, aside from the "main event" where my guests took turns buying rounds for everyone. 

     

    As far as guest list goes, there are no rules.  You don't have to invite your cousins just because you invite his or anything like that.  Just invit your closest friends - the people you most want to hang out with.  In my opinion, too many people make it too chaotic anyway.  I had 7 people plus myself fofr my B-party, and it was perfect.

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  • farram19farram19 member
    Name Dropper First Comment

    I am having my bachelorette party 3 months before my wedding because that is when the weather is best where we are going.  I think you can do it whenever you want but personally I wouldn't do it 6 or more months before the wedding.

    In terms of guests, I think you can include whoever you want but yes, all of your bridesmaids should defintely be invited. 

    Beyond that, let your MOH handle your bachelorette party :)

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  • mlg78mlg78 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    My BP was 3 weeks beforehand but in your situation, I'd almost say mid-November would be better, especially if you're going away for it. MANY people cannot afford to go away for a BP though, especially if they've already attended your shower, are attending your wedding, paying the expenses to be in your wedding for some of them, possibly getting a hotel room for your wedding, etc. Yes, it's fine to invite only one cousin as long as it's clear your relationship with that cousin is different. I invited just one person from my husband's side of the family to my BP. But right now, you need to STOP. Sit back, make wedding plans, not BP plans, and enjoy being engaged.
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  • afterimageafterimage member
    First Comment First Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    Thanks all

    To those who are expressing concern that it is too soon - don't worry. I am not trying to plan my Bachelorette party 11 months in advance - I promise I am not that crazy! I was just a bit curious and wanted some answers.  I am totally enjoying being engaged and making wedding plans.

    @delujm0 -  nobody who will be invited to the Bachelorette party is from out of town so that will not be a concern.

    I think it makes sense what everyone is saying about out-of-town b parties being more expensive, and if we do go that route I'm sure we wouldn't go far, and I would invite 8 or less people.  But I guess that can all be decided later on.

    Thank you again everyone for helping to answer my questions!

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